Divorce and Remarriage in your Church

I have noted on another thread many people expressed concern with the Catholic process of annulments.

That leads me to be interested in how various denominations handle the real issue of divorce and remarriage today in this society.

If a person is divorced and wants to remarry in your Church what process or what procedure would they need to complete to be remarried?

Is there an instance where your Pastor might say NO for reasons other than that person perhaps showed up and is not a convert to your religion?

Most of those expressing concern were in Churches where the Bible would prevail as authority so any Bible verses that correspond with this would be appreciated as well.

Thank you and God Bless,

Mary.

Cardinal Kasper also expressed concern.

How is this handled in your church, Tomdstone? Perhaps you feel your Church has a better answer to divorce and remarriage?

Mary.

I am Catholic, but perhaps not typical. I agree with what Cardinal Kasper has said about the Catholic annulment process.

In the Baha’i Faith the Local Spiritual Assembly …elected by a given community is involved in marriage and divorce issues… Baha’i marriages can occur for non-Baha’is… also divorce is reviewed by the Local Spiritual Assembly.

There is what is called a “Year of Patience” in which the couple agrees they will try to work toward resolving the causes of their divorce issues and agree to work toward reconciliation if possible… They may be referred for counseling services. If a Year of Patience is set the couple cannot have relations and must live separately… They must also refrain from relations outside the marriage until the end of the Year of Patience.

If the couple cannot arrive at resolving their difficulties during the Year of Patience a divorce is recognized and either person can remarry… there is no stigma regarding divorce as such in the Baha’i Faith.

If a Baha’i does not follow the laws of the Faith regarding marriage, divorce, remarriage it’s possible he/she could have their administrative rights removed as a sanction and they would not be considered Baha’is in good standing.

Thank you for the information.

The Year of Patience sounds like a good plan.

Mary.

In Anglicanism it needs the approval of the Bishop. Research is done to investigate the first marriage and he will take counsel from the Priest who brought the couple’s desire to him before making the decision.

In addition to looking at the Biblical considerations, they look at the reasons for the first marriage not working as well as making sure there is a very clear understanding on the dynamics which didn’t work in number one so as to minimize the chance in number 2 (should number 2 happen).

In other word, divorce and to remarry is allowed. We (in Catholicism) have lost many members due to them not being allowed to remarry and for that reason some get angry with the Church and left.

The Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod’s teaching on Marriage, Divorce and Re-Marriage is covered throroughly HERE.

Some excerpts from Divorce and Remarriage 1987:

“The creation of marriage as a permanent union of husband and wife in the one flesh
relationship remains the normative principle in the Old Testament. Although the
breaking of marriage through divorce is assumed as a present reality of the fallen world,
never is divorce and subsequent remarriage sanctioned nor the inviolability of the
marriage relationship compromised. Both in the legal code given to Israel for the
ordering of its communal and religious life, as well as in later prophetic
pronouncements, divorce is judged to be contrary to the will of God.”

“This revelation of the divine will stands in sharp contrast to every attempt to solve
marital problems by changing the law to accommodate sinful human behavior. In
Jesus’ day the application of the sixth commandment to the question of divorce
and remarriage had given rise to a large body of legislation that distorted God’s
original intention for marriage. Despite an occasional lament, [23] scribal
interpretations sought to legitimize, and thereby sanction, an evil for which no
provision was made in the beginning. Modern divorce law has accomplished the
same effect and the impression is wrongly gained, even in the Christian
community, that what has legal justification in the civil sphere also has divine
approval.”

“Divorce, destructive of what God has joined together, is always contrary to God’s
intention for marriage.”

"Divorce for unscriptural reasons, and remarriage involving such persons, are plainly
contrary to God’s will. The Christian pastor, for the sake of the spiritual welfare of those
whom he serves, must confront persons involved in such situations with the gravity of
their sin. Moreover, he may deem it necessary to warn such individuals of what may be
called “planned repentance.”

“In cases of the remarriage of persons divorced for reasons not Biblically sanctioned, true repentance would presuppose a genuine desire to reconcile with one’s estranged spouse. It is difficult to imagine, for example, how genuine contrition can exist or how absolution can be announced when there is present a refusal to seek healing. Where the refusal to reconcile and to seek healing is judged to be absent insofar as such a judgment is possible the pastor will be constrained to deny a request for remarriage.”

“Christian discipline in the congregation must be exercised in a firm, loving, and consistent manner, lest the offense of unrepented sin cause others to stumble.”

Still dreamn:

Thanks for the link and I looked through it but it was pretty comprehensive.

How does this work out practically?

A divorced person approaches your Pastor about remarriage ( A Member of the Church)
Now what?

Do they speak to the Pastor about their previous marriage and receive counseling.
How does the Pastor decide if they should remarry? Is it based on the Biblical passage that says to some remarriage may be ok with adultery. The Bible verse addressing adultery has been understood differently by different churches.

Do they contact the previous spouse to get their input?

If you know, I am interested.

Thanks,
Mary.

Each situation is carefully studied with loving, but objective, understanding.

Yes. This is standard for all couples who plan to be married. Similar to how the Catholic Church requires Pre Cana study. Every LCMS pastor require similar meetings. Some even use the same study books and questionnaires! (I know because I was married in a Catholic cathedral, and I’m familiar with the Confessional Lutheran process. The two are remarkably similar.)

In much the same way that a Catholic diocese would agree or deny a request for marriage. Where the Catholic Church calls the sad situation an “annulment,” Lutherans typically acknowledge it for what it is: divorce. And while we may use different lingo, the criteria for granting it are similar, as Stilldreamn quoted.

Usually.

Steido01 answered just as I would. In my case, I was already married to a man that was divorced and I had concerns which we discussed at length as part of a new member class before I was received into membership and received communion.

The process would not be so very different from the Catholic one, except that the determination is made at the pastor’s level instead of a bishop (or district, in our case).

Divorce is permitted in the our church for a various of reasons.
Divorce happens under the guidance of the spiritual director of the couple when all attempts at save their marriage have been exhausted.
When this occurs, remarriage is possible but there is a special rite for the second marriage which contains a penitential element for the dissolution of the first, which means that some of the more joyful aspects are removed.

Marriage is permitted up to three times in Holy Orthodoxy but each divorce necessitates a short period of excommunication.

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