Do you ever not have anything to talk to your spiritual director about?


Have anyone experienced meetings with their spiritual director where you just don’t know or can’t think of anything to talk about? What happens in this case? What if your spiritual director doesn’t get things going?


The last time I was taking spiritual direction, I just couldn’t get myself into it at all. I lasted about a year and a half, I think, but I just was not motivated to do my homework or to open up and talk about stuff. I don’t know why, but I just was feeling really “blocked up” all the time.

None of this was the fault of the person who was my spiritual director; it was just some inner part of me being very stubborn and very closed up, for reasons that I don’t even understand very well myself. :shrug:

When I can get myself to a place where I know I would do my homework, I’ll get into it again, but for right now, it just wouldn’t work, I don’t think.


Just as you examine your conscience before going to Confession, so too you should come up with something to speak about before you go to the man in whose hands your soul is entrusted. There is always something to talk about too, whether its recent defeats or victories in your spiritual life, devotions, prayers, meditations, or thoughts on God or His angels or saints.


I try to think about what I need to cover before our meeting, so I don’t waste his time.

At our first meeting several years ago, he suggested that we cover the following aspects of my life in our meetings:
*]Relationships (family, etc.)
*]Suffering (we’re both Passionists; it’s part of the spirituality of the order)
*]“Anything else” that I need to talk about
This outline helps me remember things to bring up.

That said, some meetings I simply have less to say than others. At least we touch base briefly and I go to confession.


Having nothing to talk it probably just waht you need to talk about. A good director would see that as an opening for exploration of your prayer life, if you are having blocks that you are not hearing God’s voice, to really explore what is happing in your life tht you have nothing at all going on.


I can’t imagine not having something to talk about, in part because I keep notes of things that have come up during my prayer time or things I’ve read, etc. But I think if I did show up and the best I could come up with was “nice weather we’re having” it would probably turn into a discussion of gratitude and whether I’m aware of the gifts and blessings in my life.


My problem is never having enough time to go over the things I want to discuss. My SD only allows 45 minutes every 6 weeks and often times, my appointment is canceled and rescheduled. So I usually have a session every eight weeks for 45 minutes. If you cannot have topic to discuss, maybe the interval of your sessions is too frequent.:smiley:


I try to keep a spiritual journal during the month and write down any insights or questions I’ve had during prayer, Mass, reading etc. Sometimes its just a bible verse. That helps me review my past month.

Other times when I am being good :smiley: I try to go to adoration 1 hour before SD and ready my journal very slowly.

I try to take it very seriously, preparing as for any other important meeting, not just show up in a hurry and go … hey! how’s it going?? :o

Hope that helps,



DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit