Hello, Francesca, I can totally sympathize. I revert to an emotional age of about 3 when I have to go to the doctor, esp. when I suspect that “something is wrong”, so I do feel for you.
I have had several scary events like this. Mammograms (my very first one even! :eek:) which resulted in more than one biopsy–I was a nervous wreck! Also just recently a blood test showed that something was amiss with my thyroid, so I had an ultrasound that worried the radiologist, so of course I went into full-on panic mode. I even had to go to an endocrinologist who is a specialist in thyroid disorders to have yet more tests!
You know what? ALL of these things, which I worried about so much I nearly sent myself into panic attacks, turned out to be completely benign and harmless!!
Anxiety is a perfectly normal response to these kinds of things. Just please keep reminding yourself that in the vast majority of cases the things we fear never happen, and that worrying never improved anything!!
I will be praying for you, and never forget that God is watching over you and keeping you safe!
You might find it consoling to re-read Luke 12: 22-29. I especially like these passages (verses 24-26): “Notice the ravens: they do not sow or reap; they have neither storehouse nor barn, yet God feeds them. How much more important are you than birds! Can any of you by worrying add a moment to your life-span? If even the smallest things are beyond your control, why are you anxious about the rest?”
You are doing the right thing to see your doctor–that takes both wisdom and courage, so you should be proud of yourself for forging ahead in spite of your fears!
And I bet you will soon be receiving some very comforting news!!