My first post and I am a bit nervous as to the responses I will get!
Anyway, a bit of backplot…my husband and I have been married for 10 years. At the time, I was still in school and didn’t think the time was right for having children. However, in the ten years since, I have discovered that I have panic attacks around children (dizziness, hyperventilating, sweating, loss of rational thought, etc.). I just do not like children. I have been told numerous times “it is different when they are yours” statements. The problem with this statement is that, if it turns out to not be true, then I am on the hook for the rest of my life. And I have several very close female friends who have told me that they really hate their lives since having children. This is my biggest fear. What if I hate my life? :bighanky:
My husband has been very supportive of me and these fears, but recognizes that our decision to not have children has always come with the caveat: “for now.” I am 34 and am getting to an age where things become medically more difficult for both mother and child, so a decision needs to be made soon.
I guess I would feel better if I felt any support for my situation from the Church. However, I am really struggling because I don’t think the Catholic Church does a good job with DINCs. They are great with students and singles and families. But they really don’t provide any support for married couples who do not have children. Everything I get when I try to talk to people in the Church about my issues is “suck it up…this is your job as a Catholic female…so just forget about it and get on with making babies.” :eek: And honestly, this really does not help at all. In fact, I have been so upset by this treatment lately that I am thinking about leaving the Catholic Church for some place that can be more helpful to me.
So I am just looking for advice (beyond the “it is different when they are yours” philosophy…that one has not helped) from anyone who has been there. I am quickly coming up on the point where a decision needs to be made and don’t really have anywhere else to turn.
Thank you in advance for any suggestions you might have! :o