I have been asking alot of questions—put me down if you want, but I am just confused about the existence of God, and though I still go to church (I’m Catholic) I don’t feel any relief. To add to this confusion, I had come across some weird you tube videos about channeling, I am not sure if I am allowed to use people’s names, so I won’t–but it is about a South African cult called Desteni. One person involved heavily with it was targeting me with their propaganda on my account so I had to delete it , but they do have a way of getting under a person’s skin.
All the doubts I had about God’s existence before are nothing compared to the confusion I feel now. They are atheists who believe in channeling and demons, but don’t believe in God, which is STUPID I know. I am crying right now because I feel like such an idiot for getting mixed up with this. Read my other threads or questions, and you will know I **have **believed in our Faith, in God, and prayer. I am just going through some kind of strange crisis since my dad passed away. I don’t know if it is related to my dad’s death,
I am just so afraid they will not stop bothering me by finding my e-mail–I know I am paranoid, but I can’t help it. I don’t want to have anything to do with them. This person was telling me that my life is a lie, my family is a trap, my marriage is dishonest because ALL marriages are self-centered and dishonest, that God is a figment of my imagination— a “construct of our belief system”.
PLease just pray for me. I find it strange I want prayers. I want for God to be real. Please don’t make fun of me I am ashamed of myself