Does this violate the "Golden Rule"?

In the Gospel, Jesus said that we should do to others as we want them to do to us. This is also often phrased negatively, as in “Do NOT do to others what you would NOT want them to do to you.”

If I am interested in a woman, but I have a suspicion that she MIGHT already be dating someone else, would it be wrong for me to try to court her? I figured that if I had a girlfriend, I wouldn’t want some other guy to “steal” her away. Am I violating Jesus’ precept in this case, if I suspect (but am not certain) that she might already be dating someone else?
Thank you.

No, it does not violate the Golden Rule since you do not know that she has a boyfriend. You only suspect, and you could be wrong. Obviously you’ll want to “tread lightly” to avoid a potentially embarrassing situation but there’s nothing wrong with trying to gauge someone’s availability for dating.
Its only wrong if you know she has a boyfriend since you are not treating her or her relationship with any respect.

And just as an aside, no one can “steal away” someone’s boyfriend or girlfriend. The individual will make that decision all on his/her own. You, obviously, wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with someone who treats their relationships so cavalierly but the person can’t be “stolen” he/she can only choose to leave.

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit