I learned it the hard way. It is simple really, but oh so easy to forget: Let go, and let Mama. And to do that is easy. As St. de Montfort said:
We should give ourselves up to the spirit of Mary to be moved and directed as she wishes. We should place and leave ourselves in her virginal hands, like a tool in the hands of a craftsman or a lute in the hands of a good musician. We should cast ourselves into her like a stone thrown into the sea. This is done easily and quickly by a mere thought, a slight movement of the will or just a few words as, “I renounce myself and give myself to you, my dear Mother.” And even if we do not experience any emotional fervour in this spiritual encounter it is none the less real. It is just as if a person with equal sincerity were to say - which God forbid! - “I give myself to the devil.” Even though this were said without feeling any emotion, he would no less really belong to the devil.
True Devotion to the Blessed Virgin, Chapter 7, paragraph 259
That’s it. Just a quick thought or even (as I usually do) a mental sigh of “Mama, it’s all up to you” would suffice.
If you want to make this second nature, then there is no other way to do this but with practice. Pray to Mama Mary frequently, and not just the devotions prescribed by St. de Montfort. Talk to her in your own words. Call her “Mother” or “Mama” or “Mommy”, for she really is your mother. Tell her your fears, your loves, your happiness, your sadness, your distractions, your everything. Tell her not once, but twice, or even thrice, or even more. Leave nothing secret to her. When you are distracted during your vocal prayers, don’t pay mind to them. If the distractions are too great, stop, tell Mama “Oops, there goes my mind again. Sorry. Help me Mama,” then continue as if nothing happened. And remember what St. de Montfort commented when he described “inconstant devotees”:
It is better not to burden ourselves with a multitude of prayers and pious practices but rather adopt only a few and perform them with love and perseverance in spite of opposition from the devil the world and the flesh.
Do not be anxious 4EverHis. Read what you posted:
at first I was given so much grace to help me, but then i got distracted and when God wanted to test my devotion, …I feel I’ve failed the test. I want to try again
You are now entering spiritual desolation, or the “dark night of the soul,” as St. John of the Cross calls it. Your faith is now becoming true faith; that is, you are entering the phase where your faith is not being sustained by the sensible grace of consolations, but by supernatural grace, a grace that cannot be felt. God permits this to souls who are advancing in grace so that these souls would learn to not love the consolations, but rather love the One who gives consolations.
Be of good cheer! I am sure you have not failed the test. Go on! Persevere! Remember that spiritual desolation is not given to those who are spiritual babies who can only feed on the milk of sensible consolation, but Saints who are now maturing and can now be nourished by the strong meat of insensible grace.
God bless you, and always remember: God loves you, and Mama Mary loves you