Double standards?


#1

My sister was told that if a woman was married and then her husband died she could not become a nun since she had been married. I believe this is not true and I would need documentation to back this up. But, if it is, then she asked why is it ok for a man to become a priest after being married?

Moe


#2

don’t have any back up for your sister, but i know she is wrong. how about having her contact one of the orders and ask them directly.


#3

I knew a lady (since deceased) who was married & had 8 children. Her husband died, & when the children were grown, she became a nun…She said, if she had not met her husband, she had thought of being a nun, so when she was widowed, she did it!
One of her sons was a neighbor. They would have big family get-togethers, & there she would be–in a habit, too. I always loved to see her. I thought it was a beautiful thing.
Anyway, that is how I know that widows can indeed become nuns.


#4

Standards and requirements for becoming a nun vary by order, so no blanket statement can be made.


#5

I may be wrong, but wasnt there an American Saint who was married with children who became a Nun after the death of her husband. She in fact established schools for the poor. Wasnt that Mother Drexel or was it mother Seton?


#6

Mother Seton for sure.


#7

You are correct. St. Elizabeth Ann Bayley Seton (1774-1821) had five childred before entering The Sisters of Charity.


#8

This is a great game!

Someone should start a Catholic “trivia” thread!


#9

St. Maximilian Kolbe’s mom became a nun after she and her husband were done raising their children. She told him what she was doing before he decided to become a priest (I think that’s how it went).

my Mother my Confidence,
Corinne


#10

[quote=moedom]My sister was told that if a woman was married and then her husband died she could not become a nun since she had been married. I believe this is not true and I would need documentation to back this up. But, if it is, then she asked why is it ok for a man to become a priest after being married?

Moe
[/quote]

Moe,

Besides the fact that widows are actually able to become nuns, there is the basic fallacy that nuns are the feminine equivalent of priests. Priests are in holy orders; nuns (and monks) are in religious orders. There may indeed be some religious orders that are closed to widows and widowers, although I have not heard of any. Each religious order has its own rule, although for the order to be approved by the Vatican the rule also has to be approved.

  • Liberian

#11

[quote=joshua1]I may be wrong, but wasnt there an American Saint who was married with children who became a Nun after the death of her husband. She in fact established schools for the poor. Wasnt that Mother Drexel or was it mother Seton?
[/quote]

Many of the Saints were women who entered the convent after their husbands died. Not only can a widower enter the convent-in many ordrers this is where a majority of their novices come from!


#12

[quote=estesbob]Many of the Saints were women who entered the convent after their husbands died. Not only can a widower enter the convent-in many ordrers this is where a majority of their novices come from!
[/quote]

Out of curiosity, does anyone know which Orders tend to receive the most widows as novices??? I was curious b/c I know that some Orders get almost entirely young women. Thanks and God Bless.


#13

[quote=moedom]My sister was told that if a woman was married and then her husband died she could not become a nun since she had been married. I believe this is not true and I would need documentation to back this up. But, if it is, then she asked why is it ok for a man to become a priest after being married?

Moe
[/quote]

no 1 rule for this type of question: who said it? when did they say it? what was their source or authority? do not even bother debating or answering abstract questions like this, an apologist should be spending time answering valid questions about valid teachings and practices of the Church. I am sure rules vary from order to order about age and qualifications, but historically convents have always welcomed widows both to cloistered and active communities.


#14

ST. Jane Frances De Chantal (the patron saint of our parish) was also a parent and widow before she became a nun and founded an order of nuns.


#15

[quote=moedom]My sister was told that if a woman was married and then her husband died she could not become a nun since she had been married. I believe this is not true and I would need documentation to back this up. But, if it is, then she asked why is it ok for a man to become a priest after being married?
[/quote]

Moe, Carthusian nuns are consecrated virgins (I think the Poor Clares also), other monastic Orders, such as the Discalced Carmelites, do not have this requirement. A friend of mine - actually a divorcee who received an annulment - is a full-professed Discalced Carmelite nun in California. An Illinois Discalced Carmelite monastery accepted into their house a well-known San Francisco socialite following the death of her husband.

In Christ,
Frances


#16

Cornelia Connelly became a nun while she was married.

She and her husband (and yes, they had kids) converted to Catholicism. In the past, her husband had changed religions often, and when he became Catholic, he decided he wanted to be a priest. Apparently this was possible if Cornelia agreed to become a nun. For his sake, she gave in.

Later, he changed his mind again, left the priesthood, left Catholicism, and sued to get his wife back. It was, at the time, a very famous court case in England. He lost, which was pretty amazing considering how anti-Catholic England still was at the time.


#17

[quote=trailblazer]don’t have any back up for your sister, but i know she is wrong. how about having her contact one of the orders and ask them directly.
[/quote]

Your sister is wrong. There was a Catholic nun on EWTN within the last 2 weeks. She had been married, her husband died and she is now a nun.


#18

It really is necessary to take such intimations of sexism in the church with a pinch of salt.


#19

St.Rita,Patroness of the Impossible,became a Nun after her husband died.

newadvent.org/cathen/13064a.htm


#20

[quote=moedom]My sister was told that if a woman was married and then her husband died she could not become a nun since she had been married. I believe this is not true and I would need documentation to back this up. But, if it is, then she asked why is it ok for a man to become a priest after being married?

Moe
[/quote]

No, it is false. Elizabeth Ann Seton was married and had kids, yet she became a nun.


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