Dr. Taylor Marshall on Catholic Marriage


Dr.Taylor Marshall, a Catholic philosopher and father of eight has some radical suggestions on marriage in view of the recent revolution initiated by Supreme Court. Here are some examples.

1.Start using the term “Holy Matrimony” and always use that term. Yes, you don’t need permission. That’s capital H and capital M. Go there. The word “holy” is important and “matrimony” has its etymology in the Latin mater meaning “mother.” Matrimony brings about the procreation of babies and makes women into “mothers.” Holy Matrimony. Got it?
2.We must encourage Catholic Church to officially declare ex cathedra that our Holy Matrimony is a sacrament between a man and a woman that resides above the natural order of government and that it is ratified and regulated by the Catholic Church alone. True, this is already Catholic teaching, but we need to be vocal about it and make it clear as day.

7.Recapture Holy Matrimony as a church event and this means we need to distance ourselves from the pomp of the afterparty, flowers, cake, guests, etc. Holy Matrimony should feel more somber like a priestly ordination and less like a Quinceañera or debutant ball. Holy Matrimony is not a narcissistic parade for princesses and their mothers. It’s a sacrament. Reign it in.

9.Hang on to your Catholic vocabulary. If you have a gay co-worker who is “married” don’t call his partner a “husband” and don’t call his union a “marriage.” You wouldn’t call a Protestant service “a Mass” and you wouldn’t call the Reverend Jesse Jackson a “priest” or “Father.” I also don’t call a Lutheran a “Catholic” even though he claims to be one. Sorry, I have to be true to my beliefs. If I get fired, so be it. If you don’t follow your conscience, you’ll be miserable.
10.Do not attend marriages that are not really marriages. When the judge or minister says, “Is there any reason why these two should not be married? Speak now or forever hold your peace,” you are morally obliged as a patriotic citizen of your community and as a baptized Christian to speak up and say it. If you don’t want to be in that awkward situation, don’t go!

Read the rest for yourself.




Agreed, AMEN, God Bless, Memaw


Yes - where I am - I have always advocated the approach taken within sections 1 & 2 above. Hasn’t particularly got me anywhere; but there you go.


Read the rest for yourself.



I would love to read the rest, but the link you provided appears to be to your email. Can you provide the link to the article? Thanks.




I think Dr. Marshall is definitely onto something here. The secular state will definitely stay completely away from the word “Holy” and, therefore SSM advocates will get their gay wedding cakes and end up eating them, too.

Catholic bakers would be able to plead a case that they only do “Holy Matrimony cakes.” That would leave other denominations out on a tenuous limb, but at the same time give them reason to more seriously consider their views vis a vis the Church.

Catholics who are not serious about Holy Matrimony and what their vows mean to their chosen spouse and future children will have to choose between the Church and secular society. Parents with SSA children will be given a clear set of options. On this we must go with Church teaching, not secular society and certainly not a dubious and confusing intermingling of the two.

:clapping: Dr. Marshall!


I love this. Thank you for posting it Linus.

I love especially #7- The most beautiful ceremony for Holy Matrimony I witnessed was one that occurred during a regular Mass. The bride and groom just came forward and exchanged vows in the middle of our Sunday attendance. No pomp, but the truest true in front of everyone and most importantly of all in front of God. Real stuff without the fluff. Happy couple, happy congregation. I don’t like all the focus on the bride at wedding ceremonies… God should be the focus. The couple should be important. I feel like today its all about the woman- and how she looks, which is sad. That focus is so superficial and banal compared to the beauty of what Holy Matrimony really is.


Fantastic article and I think Dr. Marshall has hit the nail on the head.

However, I’m still a little bit iffy on this one.

What is so wrong about an after party?

I completely agree that the marriage itself should be about God, husband and wife within the Mass.

But why not celebrate after?
Jesus turned water into wine at the wedding…there were loads of people there and he created 7 more barrels of wine for the guests to enjoy.

Why not celebrate after the Mass?

As long as the celebration doesn’t take precedence over Mass or replaces a Mass.

You can have a Holy wedding and still have a great party!

My husband and I did!



Not to mention the enormous amount of money wasted–oops, I meant spent. :wink:


I love this article too! Some dioceses have Mass celebrated for couples married 50 years! As a couple that’s been married this long I think it would be a great idea too if couples who have been married for 25 years, 50, 60 etc. renew their vows at a Sunday Mass. We could also include congrats to these couples in the diocesan paper and include stories about them. And I love the Holy Matrimony instead of wedding. I do believe though having a modest reception afterwords, not an extravaganza, is a good thing. We had a reception with a sit down dinner and a band that played rock and polkas. There were still people talking about this years after and how much fun it was. I bought my own wedding dress, and we paid for much of the wedding, not my parents so don’t regret it at all.


I think he just meant that during the actual wedding in church one should not be looking to leave for the party and not focused on what is going on in church. He just said ‘distance’, and I did not understand his comment to say that you should not have a party.

I’m in total agreement with you that the after party is good and holy as well. I think it pleases God very much when people who love, care and support each other come together in celebration and relaxation and fun, especially over something as beautiful as Holy Matrimony.


Sorry about that, here is a good link provided by another poster.




Here is anothe interesting article by William Kilpatrick, " Political correctness will be our death. "




Do they use the, “Speak now or forever hold your peace” in Catholic weddings? I can’t recall ever having heard this, except for movies. Otherwise I could have very good reasons to attend an upcoming wedding.


Thanks for posting this: it’s an excellent blog post, and I agree with every word. :slight_smile:


I don’t think it was ever a part of Catholic weddings. Though I could be wrong, it has been 20 years since I’ve been to one.



This reminds me of a blog I read a while ago. Not to disparage you, I think a party is absolutely Okay, maybe even called for, but I think what the author means is that it has to be put in the proper perspective of the sacrament:

Why is it that weddings cause people to spend so much time, energy and money? And more money. The average American wedding costs almost $29,000, according to “The Wedding Report”, a market research publication. $29,000!” Oh, by the by, the usual donation to the church is about $200.00. That $200 goes to the church, not to the priest. The usual gift to the priest is a hearty handclasp. The usual cost of the photographer is $2,000.00. All this tells me that the photographs are ten times more important than the grace of the sacrament, in most peoples’ estimation. The usual fee for the DJ is $1,500.00. I am consoled by this. It means that painful, occasionally obscene music loud enough to cause brain damage is only 7.5 times more important than the grace of the sacrament.

The entire post is worth a read : reverendknow-it-all.blogspot.com/2009/10/rant-on-weddings.html


This a fabulous idea. I will bring it up at our next RCIA team meeting. Rather than taking about “getting married” we can talk about entering the covenant of Holy Matrimony.

I also feel the focus should be more on the sacrament than the reception. Having a party after the Mass is fine but it should take second place to the wedding itself.

I’m definitely bring this up to our priest when I see him this week.


I think many wedding receptions have gotten a bit extreme, but I do agree with you.

We actually attended an ordination Mass a few years ago that was followed by a very nice reception (and by nice I don’t mean expensive, but I mean nice - the food was good, the company was great, there was good music, etc.) We had a great time, and I think it was all in keeping with what had happened at Mass earlier that day.


I am so glad you posted this. I agree with every word of this article.:thumbsup: Thank you so much for posting all the steps.

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