I don’t eat breakfast.
Today I ate spagetti for lunch and when I got home 5 hours later, I had 4 eggs and 1 piece of bread. About an hour and a half later I made myself a cacao drink (with milk). I really like cacao. About an hour later, I made myself another cacao.
That adds up to a bit less than 1/2 liters of milk (I have somewhat big cup. There was a bit left from the 1/2 liters which I gave to my dog - she likes milk).
I know that you can’t commit a mortal sin without knowing it. But when I was making a second cup, I was like ‘in your face scrupulosity’, because I know this may cause me a scrupulosity attack (that I think I am having right now). I gained some weight in the last 7 months (after I quit smoking). I think its mainly because I crave sweets and chocolate. But for the last 2 months I am also on zoloft (that I had to start taking, because scrupulosity made me act really weird and was diagnosed with ocd).
I went to confession today - morning. I really hoped and believed that tomorrow I will go to Holy Communion without going to confession first. That will be the first time after about 2 months. I’m never brave enough to trust myself that I don’t have a mortal sin on my soul, so I just can’t go to the Holy Communion without confession first. But this time, I was very optimistic- that was probably the reason for my ‘in your face scrupulosity’ when I was making the second cup. But I didn’t make the second cup for that reason, but because I really like cacao and I wanted another one.
Is this a mortal sin? I am very very sorry for such a long ramble. I thank you all for your thoughts. God bless you all.