[quote="ChiRho, post:18, topic:230191"]
I am unmarried, but speaking into the future, I certainly am willing to do those things.
why don't you think resentment will build when the husband is constantly sacrificing? Why don't you think that is unfair?
nb: I fully accept both roles. I look forward to dying for my wife -- daily in the sense of sacrifice, and perhaps (though unlikely, but sometimes a possibility) in a literal sense. I also expect that my future spouse will uphold her end, and assume her role as a wife, as scripture has made clear.
My problem is that I think you are upholding a double standard, or at least making a bad comparison. You don't see a problem with the man sacrificing for his wife, for "her happiness, her needs" and "putting himself last", but you automatically look at submission to the husband's judgment as a sure-fire route to marital strife (and thus offer a new definition of the role of a wife, which doesn't really involve much sacrifice). Why not equally scrutinize both? My stance is that both roles are beautiful and holy. As EasterJoy rightly states above, both can be misused. I'm not denying that, but let's try to compare like things: the ideal form of a husband and the ideal form of a wife, and their ideal roles, instead of assuming that the role of the wife is so easily perverted and having to constantly redefine what the passage means.
I think it is unfair to both husband and wife for the husband to unilaterally make all decision because in dealing with two adults both should have an input in their lives. There has to be communication and sharing.
Originally Posted by trinichiqn
I don't think a wife being submissive to her husband is about allowing or letting him make unilateral decisions without her it is unfair to both parties and resentment can build. That is a sure-fire way to get hurt.
I think that resentment will build up on both sides because (I am a woman but) if I was the husband and my wife's definition of submission means she has no opinion on anything I will get annoyed over time, I married and adult not a child who needs to be led and instructed. As a wife if my husband's understanding of submission means he can make every decision for me I will also get annoyed because once again I an adult not a child and we are supposed to be sharing our life together. When resentment builds there will be hurt feelings.
The husband is not the only one who needs to be sacrificing. Eph 5:21 "Being Subject one to another, in the fear of Christ" Douay-Rheims.