Face-Book-your thoughts

Hello,

I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. Yesterday I deleted all but four friends on Facebook. My husband uses my account for games so I did not delete my account. I find myself checking facebook for updates and comparing others lives with mine. It gets to the point where I feel bad about myself. What do I tell people when they ask why I am no longer their friend on Facebook? I have done this once before and ended up befriending all of my aquaintances again. What are your thoughts of Facebook? Please advise.

God Bless,
WendyAnn

I have a friend who does this regularly, and for most of the same reasons. My big question would be, Why on earth should their subjective views of their own lives make you feel bad about yours?

I think Facebook's great, as long as you have the right perspective. It's a great way to keep in closer touch with family & friends, and a way to keep in at least occasional contact with people you otherwise wouldn't keep in touch with. There's always going to be drama queens, attention seekers, braggarts and adults who think they're still in high school, but they're the reason they made the unfriend and ignore buttons.

I really enjoy FB. But I have a strict no-work associates policy, and no one that I don't really know closely, except for a few friends from high school. It's fun to see everyone's kid photos, vacation photos, and wishing happy birthday, or praying for the loss of a family member or loved one.

I did a massive purge shortly after I joined, before I set certain personal policies for being there. I was contacted by a guy I dated in junior high. It was not a healthy relationship, and it was quite traumatic to be tracked down by this person. So after that I purged deeply, locked down my account as tight as I could, and now I am very selective about who sees me out there and who is on my list. Now I am quite happy with spending time chatting with friends, flirting with my own husband, and keeping up on distant family.

Just set your own rules about how you will use it - just like any tool, it can harm or heal, depending on how you use it.

~Liza

Facebook is actually pretty useful for updates and reminders. I don't use it for socializing as much as I do for sharing ideas and setting up club meetings.

Oh and it's also less of a hassle to message people compared to stuff like Yahoo!.

Friends harried me into getting an account. :smiley:

It’s okay. I have like twelve friends or so and it’s useful to see how they’re doing. I update mine every week or every day as the spirit moves me (I also link new blog posts, which blogspot makes EZ!).

I don’t play games.

Facebook is neither good nor evil. It’s what you do with it.

Good advice. Thanks.

Wendy Ann

Facebook has helped me get reacquainted with my cousins and several friends that I have lost touch with. I think the pros of it have far outweighed the cons. Sometimes I get jealous when I see other people's postings but that is something you have to deal with anyway-what I found when I really examined my conscience was that I was jealous of some of these people but I was jealous anyway-Facebook just brought it to the forefront. I think some people just post stuff to make themselves better, to brag on themselves.

Some of my "friends-usually high school acquaintances" post really trashy stuff so I just hide them instead of defriending them or deleting them.

[quote="turtle18, post:7, topic:243716"]
Facebook has helped me get reacquainted with my cousins and several friends that I have lost touch with. I think the pros of it have far outweighed the cons. Sometimes I get jealous when I see other people's postings but that is something you have to deal with anyway-what I found when I really examined my conscience was that I was jealous of some of these people but I was jealous anyway-Facebook just brought it to the forefront. I think some people just post stuff to make themselves better, to brag on themselves.

Some of my "friends-usually high school acquaintances" post really trashy stuff so I just hide them instead of defriending them or deleting them.

[/quote]

You can 'hide' people on Facebook? :eek:

Every time I get used to it they change it. :p

I have mixed feelings about Facebook as well. I'm often tempted to go through the hassle of deleting everything and closing the account (which apparently isn't easy and discouraged) I find Facebook an unnecessary distraction, since I'm weak and prone to procrastination.

But, it is a neat, cool, and yes, sometimes a useful world. I keep in touch with many friends, and sometime announce important events.

I don't understand people who seem to be on Facebook 24/7, I guess they update themselves from their "smart" phones... That would drive me crazy.

Moderation is the key I guess.

I have mixed feelings about Facebook as well. I'm often tempted to go through the hassle of deleting everything and closing the account (which apparently isn't easy and discouraged) I find Facebook an unnecessary distraction, since I'm weak and prone to procrastination.

All you do is "deactivate account" It takes 30 seconds.

FB is a nice way to communicate with all my friends from college now that I've moved on. I use it to talk to my parents, brothers, sister-in-laws, cousins and my boyfriend. I mostly love the local stores FB that I have. It's so cute to get local news.

[quote="purplesunshine, post:10, topic:243716"]
All you do is "deactivate account" It takes 30 seconds.

[/quote]

Well, yes. But your account still exists, and can be re-activated in 30 seconds. FB doesn't want to lose any participants, which is understandable.

If you're paranoid and want to REALLY remove all your info, you have to jump through a bunch of hoops, which is intentionally unintutitive and time consuming.

But don't get me wrong, I like Facebook, and like beer, if used responsibly can be fun

[quote="Wendy_Ann, post:1, topic:243716"]
Hello,

I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. Yesterday I deleted all but four friends on Facebook. My husband uses my account for games so I did not delete my account. I find myself checking facebook for updates and comparing others lives with mine. It gets to the point where I feel bad about myself. What do I tell people when they ask why I am no longer their friend on Facebook? I have done this once before and ended up befriending all of my aquaintances again. What are your thoughts of Facebook? Please advise.

God Bless,
WendyAnn

[/quote]

The thing to remember about Facebook is that it does not give you an accurate view of another person's life. It is easy to get sucked into the "grass is always greener" mentality because most people try to put their best foot forward.

Are most people going to post a status update about how they had a huge fight with their spouse about who gets to hold the TV remote control? Or about how their daughter threw a severe temper tantrum because they didn't give her another M&M? Are most people going to post photos of themselves in unflattering poses or after just having rolled out of bed? Not likely.

So try to keep that in mind when looking at what other people post. They are showing their best sides and hiding the negatives.

But, that said, if Facebook disrupts your peace and leads you to feel worse about yourself, you shouldn't feel the least bit bad about cutting it out of your life (or at least scaling it way back as you have done). You don't owe it to anyone to friend them on Facebook.

[quote="Wendy_Ann, post:1, topic:243716"]
Hello,

I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. Yesterday I deleted all but four friends on Facebook. My husband uses my account for games so I did not delete my account. God Bless,
WendyAnn

[/quote]

Just a cautionary note about the games: all of those game apps are using Facebook to get information about people so that they can sell information about those users to advertisers and anyone else in the name of "market research." So, just something to think about and research...I know there's a lot of info out there available from people much more "in the know" about it than I am. I generally avoid any app/program that asks for permission to use/see my personal information before loading. Never a good sign, IMO.

Good luck discerning your personal FB policies!
~Sally

I'm using my facebook to communicate with the members of my church group, post notes, or even schedule.

I also share my photo from church events (usually, I get the job to be the photographer). Besides that, I love sharing Catholic articles/videos on my wall. It's a way to evangelize.

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