[quote="iloveyouJesus3, post:11, topic:218670"]
To get married to her in grad school would be a dream come true! I wish I could... but how could I?
I would not have a job, I would not be able to support a family, How would I pay for rent for a house or apartment?
I mean, the only thing I could really think of is living with the parents, but I don't know if that is the best idea, I have heard that living with parents leads to very many problems..
I don't know, I"m trying to look things up about how to get married while in grad school, is it really possible?
I mean, in my culture, weddings aren't small, they consist of 300-500 people and are very costly, how would I pay for it, taking out a loan? And grad school surely will be very expensive, I mean would being in that much debt be bad for the start of a marriage???
Has anyone gotten married while in grad school on here? If so, how did you guys make ends meet?
Well, how do you intend to pay rent while in grad school if you are not married? Are you planning to have a part-time job, a TA/RA position on campus, or use student loans for living expenses? If it is a graduate program that offers teaching or research assistant positions (you don't say what field you intend to study), these positions often are enough to cover living expenses. If the graduate program does not offer these kinds of positions, I'm guessing that the financial aid office there would be able to talk to you about the kind of aid typically offered to grad students there and how students cover living expenses. Would she be in school while you were in grad school? If not, she'd presumably be working, which would help cover your joint living expenses.
While I was in my first year of grad school, I was engaged. I covered my living expenses from federal student loans (I had a scholarship for most of the tuition), but minimized them as best I could by living with a roommate in an affordable apartment, not eating out often, etc. My husband and I got married after my first year, and for the next two years, I was finishing grad school but my husband was working. So, my 75% scholarship plus some small student loans covered tuition, and his salary paid our joint living expenses while I was still in school.
As for weddings... well. I'm also from a background where weddings are traditionally large, expensive affairs. As I said, I got married during a three-year graduate program. The first thing we did was that we cut the guest list. We invited about 110 people to our wedding and had 80 show up. This was bucking tradition, but since we were paying for the wedding ourselves, we invited only the number we could afford. (We told our parents that if they wanted Mr. so-and-so there, they could pay for his dinner. They did not take us up on that offer for any guests, incidentally.) We got married on a Friday evening, so all of our wedding vendors cost about 10 percent less.
In general, we tried to keep our focus on the marriage, rather than the wedding. A wedding is nice, and it's great to celebrate the sacrament -- but it is only a single day. My opinion is that couples should have the wedding they can afford, and not delay getting married simply so they can have a bigger party. We spent around $7,500 total on our wedding, and you know what? We have joyous memories of celebrating our wedding day with our closest friends and family, and we have no regrets about the choices we made in planning it.
Just my $0.02.