[quote="Irish_Girl_68, post:1, topic:230395"]
Hello CAF friends:
Please help. I'm so lost today. Everything in my life feels like it's falling apart. My mother is dying, I'm struggling with my eldest child and the choices she makes (stupid, dangerous and immoral ones) and my son's classmate committed suicide on Tuesday.
I've been to Adoration but I'm so distracted I can't concentrate long enough to pray. I just feel so hopeless right now. I really need your help.
I need to be there for my Mom. I am not giving her 100 percent of my attention, though. My body may be there; my head isn't. It's hard to fully give her the love and attention she needs in her last days with everything else that's happening.
This is terrible, but I'm ready to throw the towel in on my daughter. I love her so much. But, I am starting to wonder if I should just accept she's ultimately going to screw up her life no matter how hard I try. Nothing I do or say seems to make any difference. I want to be a good parent but I feel like a failure. I am, frankly, ashamed she's my child. No matter what I do, she always takes the wrong road. She's 15. What she's doing will catch up to her and I feel powerless to stop any of it.
My son's classmate's death has me devastated. He wasn't that different than my own child. I feel like it so easily could have been my son. I am grieving for the family, my son and all of the people affected by this tragedy.
So, anyway, please pray that I can find some answers, some hope in all of this. Thank you all and God bless.
Oh my gosh. What a huge burden you have right now! When I am in the throes of a crisis, sometimes I can only say one prayer, and that is "Jesus, help me." And then as I get a little peace, I can say the first part of the Serenity Prayer, "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." And then I might just say the Jesus prayer, "Jesus, have mercy on me, a sinner."
But I have heard people even pray, "Jesus, 9-1-1!" Maybe that's a kind of irreverence, I'm not sure, so if that doesn't seem right, ignore it.
You are looking at 3 different HUGE losses - your mother (the first relationship any of us has on earth), your daughter and your hopes and dreams for her, and your son's classmate (which leads you to fear for your son).
Adoration is great. You don't even have to pray, just be in front of Jesus. Do you have other support in your life? Call as many friends as you can. Talk about things, it helps us women to talk about stuff with our friends. As far as your daughter, could she be acting out partly because of your mother's declining health and all the stress from that? Try to find something good she is doing and think of that more than her failures. You love her no matter what, please remember that, no matter what she does, you will always love her. She may end up being a prodigal but she may not. I was afraid I was really going to have to kick my son out of the house at 16. We put him in a behavioral camp last summer and it helped a lot. Try not to respond to her provocations. Again, support is critical. I hope your husband is supporting you in this time, but don't lean on him for everything. If you need some grief counseling, please get it.
My heart goes out to you. Sometimes life just plain hurts.