Feeling down about our recent move


#1

Please pray for my family and me…Well, mainly me. I’m not feeling all that happy right now with our move to FL.:frowning: It doesn’t feel like Christmas here at all, my husband’s job situation isn’t going as I had hoped (a key reason we relocated here), I miss our old parish back in PA, and I just have been feeling like I wish we hadn’t moved. I like our neighborhood, my kids have adjusted great, they are doing well in school–I don’t wish we had stayed and not moved, but I’m not seeing the ‘wow’ effect of moving. I’m not seeing anything different about our lives…not that we needed a change…but moving 1000 miles…I thought that things would be more…wow. I dunno how to put this into words.

The strange thing is, my husband and I both felt that God wanted us to make this move. In His signs, and through our prayers, we felt that this was the next step, designed by God for us.

So why do I feel this way? I don’t always feel this way–but today and this week, I do. I am grateful to God for all of our blessings, but somehow…I am not seeing why He wanted us to move here. (It would take a long while to share with you what led up to our move – but there were crystal clear signs from God that this was His intent.) So, I guess I just have to swallow my ‘feelings.’ I heard a priest recently say that we need to leave our feelings out of our faith.

Ok enough of my ramblings. Please pray for me though, that somehow I snap out of this.:frowning:


#2

I will be praying for you. I’m one of those people that really need snow at Christmas so I completely sympathize. I have been in Florida at Christmas before and it feels really weird to me (that’s probably not helping :blush: ). The holidays probably have a big part of in you sad, change always is felt more profoundly during the holidays. Don’t feel guilty for feeling the way you do, I’m sure overtime you will grow to feel more and more at home.

I can completely relate to the let down feeling. Mine was the opposite situation. When hubby was in the Navy and he finally left the military I was excited to go back home. Well the first night we got back my mom and I got into a fight, we were a day late so all my old friends who were supposed to help us into our apartment were busy. It wasn’t exactly the warm welcome I expected. Even though we were back in our home town I went through a period of adjustment that took a while.

Don’t be hard on yourself and give it some time. (((Hugs)))


#3

Thanks rayne…always nice hearing from you. In thinking it through the other day…as to what was bugging me…one of the thoughts was…how really no one at my work has asked me about my move. I moved 1000 miles. I would have thought that mgmt would have showed more concern. I work in a very fast paced, conservative (sometimes cold) nearly all male environment…an old boys club, as they say. I am sort of an oasis there, as my dept is spread out throughout the US, and I am responsible for all of FL…so, perhaps, with larger responsibility, comes a lonelier feeling? I would say at times, I have an alone feeling, but I am making friends at work, slowly. Some really nice female friends. I do love the weather (and no more shoveling, etc) but I miss the snow at and around Christmas. It’s more than that though…It has to do with my husband’s job. He would like to get back into the industry he dealt with before we moved, but it’s taking more time than we thought it would. I try to be supportive, but sometimes, I get lost in my own thoughts. Funny thing is…I have not been praying the Rosary as often…when I pray the Rosary daily–my eyes lock on Christ. My focus is not ‘on the waves’ but on Christ.


#4

Hey Sharon!
It’s your first holiday season away from PA. Give it some time. Right now it’s cold here and I wouldn’t mind some of the Florida warmth. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
Kathy


#5

I’ll pray for you. As for the WOW of the move to Florida maybe it’s a blessing not to have?

We moved here (Orlando) in Aug. 2004. Year of THREE hurricanes. Here all of 4 days when the big one hit! Took out most of my lanai and large oak tree in front yard. It was a great way to meet our neighbors though!

Honestly, I don’t regret moving. I used to work in Manhattan and after 9/11 it was just so depressing going there everyday.


#6

hi iamrefreshed…I don’t regret moving at all…we all truly believe this is God’s will…just perhaps, some things that I thought would go a bit differently. But, that could also be God’s will too.:slight_smile: My husband got some great news today–will be starting a new job on Monday…good corporation, still would like to be back in insurance, but he’ll broach that in the new year. I am very happy for this newfound news though today. I prayed a lot this morning…probably more of a conversation with the Lord, and said that I am grateful for everything…and need to lean on God for everything–not my own understanding. I have a bad habit of ‘trying to make sense’ out of every thing in life. Who knows, maybe this new job will be a good opportunity for my husband…and he won’t want to pursue something else. thanks for listening.


#7

Hey WEGirl, Hope you had a better day today and the kids are being respectfully. We are in the Sunbelt too, but this is home for us. We lived in snow country for a few years and could not hack it.:blush:

The friends we had while we were away could not understand how it could be Christmas with the A/C running in the house or having to swat away mosquitoes. But I am sure you’ll be able to send your friends and family up North a Florida Christmas Card that will make them wish they were down here with you.

Hang in there, you always have great post and I know you’re a wonderful Mom. Best of luck to your hubby on Monday, we are about the same age. We also have an 11 year old girl our caboose, of all girls. It is such a Sorority house.


#8

I guess you’ll just have to move to IOWA and spend some time with our family!:thumbsup:

Seriously, though, I will pray for you.


#9

Hi TIME–Thanks for your note. Yes, the kids are doing great. lol They were arguing a moment ago about who is putting the Christmas tree up ‘better.’:rolleyes: But, the debating has cut down a bit. My daughter told me today (in reference to that thread I posted) that she 'is just joking when she tells us no." [to doing their chores] Okay, whatever you say sweetie.:wink: I wouldn’t trade being a mom for anything…it’s one of the greatest gifts I have ever been blessed with…

Regarding FL–I actually went to school at UCF, in Orlando, and lived there for some time. My family lived in South FL for a while–my family is still there…and we moved away when our kids were little…but I’m believing our trip ‘back’ here to be God’s will…I really do. God never said His plan for our lives would be a piece of cake…:o All in all–most things have run smoothly. I don’t like all the traffic here though…but I really love where we have chosen to live…lakes all around us…and the cyprus trees…they give our backyard that up north look.

My friends/family back in PA are envious of our warm weather – they are already ‘over’ the bitter cold! Honestly, I don’t miss the snow…with the exception of it on Christmas day…that was always so beautiful to me…my kids miss building snowmen.

God bless you and your family, too!


#10

What part of Florida are you in? There are a few of us that post here who live way down in the South east. It’s kind of nice when your kids don’t have to be cooped up inside because of the cold. There’s a few neighbors who have a block party every year, a bunch of them pitch in they get a bounce house, big inflatable slide, Santa passing out gifts, free food and drink… things you couldn’t do in a snowstorm.
We DO have seasons… rainy season, dry season, tourist season and hurricaine season:D
Don’t worry, there’ll be a few days when you’ll have to pull out a sweater, just no guarantee it’ll be for Christmas.
I’ve lived in Florida my whole life, so I can’t really relate, I guess. The only thing I don’t like is the growing traffic and congestion.
I don’t envy you starting over, making new friends, finding new shortcuts, good restaraunts, etc. I’d feel kind of lonely, too.


#11

VAC–LOL@ your seasons ‘break down.’ ha! Actually, it was a nice and chilly a few weeks ago…I had to use the seat heaters in the car when driving to work…brrrr…weird how you can get so used to the heat, that 60’s feels cold. ha!

We have enjoyed finding good restaurants…not a problem…lol And thankfully, we have made some great friends…new neighbors are trustworthy and fun…we had a party not too long ago…invited a few neighbors…a lonely feeling is more at work that I have. But, time is healing these ‘wounds,’ I suppose. My husband’s job situation is also looking up. Truth be told, I’m a terribly impatient woman…it’s definitely something I need help with. If this is God’s will…I want everything to work out…YESTERDAY.:smiley: (I think that’s the New Jersey in me…I was born and raised up north)

I live north of Tampa, by the way…where are you?:slight_smile:


#12

We’re further south, in Pembroke Pines. I think we have a lot in common:D Patience was not one of my gifts either. It takes time to build relationships


#13

Here’s one positive point of living in Florida I bet you never thought of: it’s a good place to be if you break your leg. I’m in Canada, and I broke my leg(more or less, kind of a long story). I’m on crutches for the next 3 months, give or take. It just snowed. Wet crutches HAVE ZERO TRACTION. Snow + heat inside = wet. I live in fear of slipping every time I take a step.
Weird, I know. But you’ll be happy to be some place warm where it doesn’t snow if you or your husband or any of your kids break a leg.


#14

:hmmm: I had not thought of this, no! ha I am sorry you broke your leg though…ouch. Ugh–that’s terrible. :frowning: Feel better pumpkin.


#15

You know how you look forward to Christmas or vacation and attach all sorts of expectations to the event? Even if it all goes well, there are some feelings of loss when it’s over.

Sounds like normal feelings after a big event. --KCT


#16

We don’t like it here either (putting it mildly) and yet we find ourselves buying a home and probably having to stay here another 2 years. But…we feel that Divine Providence has this for us right now. And if anything it makes us appreciate where we came from a lot more.

We’re way down in SW Florida. I’m really not into the small town and pompousness down here. But as for weather, I’ve been living in the south for 12 years and grown accustomed to brown Christmases. :wink:


#17

hi nicole:) My family lived in Boca for some time…beautiful place…but riddled with snobbery. It’s like NY and NJ in shorts…:stuck_out_tongue: Now, I grew up in NJ, but I forget how depressed everyone seems to be there…ha My family and moved away from there back in the late 80’s…I finished high school in Boca…it was an experience to say the least. My sister still lives in SF, and I enjoy visiting, but it seems a bit pompous as you say. I will say that I am glad we moved here. I don’t know if that is not coming across in my posts…But, as KCT said (thanks KCT)…perhaps there were expectations on my part that are not being realized yet…or maybe I just had unrealistic expectations. I dunno. I do know that we feel this is God’s will…wherever it leads, we’ll follow. Thanks for listening.


#18

This made me laugh. When hubby was in the Navy we were stationed in New Jesery. I used to work customer service at the Service Merchandise in Hazlet. Hah…I know all about you impatient New Jersey people.:wink: When we moved back home I transferred to a Service Merchandise here in Michigan. When my fellow employees used to complain about customers I was like “Are you kidding? This is a cake walk compared to NJ.” It wasn’t just the customers, my managers, fellow employees -so much more intense back in New Jersey.

But they also were very caring people. They helped me so many times when my hubby was out to sea and I was having car problems. I was a 20 year old on my own, totally unfamiliar with the area. One mananger drove me home, another took my car into the shop while I was work, another time a co-workers husband picked my car from work and fixed it while I was working. They were good people…terrible drivers :p…but good people. And excellant roads, after living in Jersey, when I first came home to Michigan to visit I felt like I was driving on a cheese grater. Oh yeah and great food -pizza is awesome and submarine sandwiches -huge! :thumbsup:

Hey by the way you grew up on the east coast,* I* grew up in the north. When I first read “I think that’s the New Jersey in me…I was born and raised up north”, I was like :confused: . SIlly me I though only Michiganders and Canadians lived “up north”.:smiley: (I’m teasing ya.)


#19

Pumpkin, if you google “crutches” and “ice,” you’ll find several websites which offer these clamp-on ice cleat things for your crutches. Those won’t help with the wet indoor floors, but they are great for outside. BTDT – I live in Michigan and have been on crutches on two different occasions in my life during snow season. :frowning: Hang in there and heal up quickly!

Whatevergirl, your first holiday season in a new place far from “home” is always kind of rough. I’ve been in that boat a couple of times in my life, so I know how it feels. We tend to remember the good things about our former home and ignore the bad, so sometimes it helps to consciously think about the downside of our life back there when we start to get melancholy about it. “Yeah, I’m here now, but at least I won’t have Uncle Bob showing up on our doorstep on Christmas night, drunk and trying to pick a fight,” that sort of thing. As far as the “WOW” factor, “wow” is for the honeymoon phase of your move, but now the dreary realities of daily life are starting to set in. After all, no matter where you go you won’t escape the aggravations of daily life – the car won’t start or the kids got into trouble at school or the dog had to go to the vet. A wise person once told me that to dwell on what we are missing is to miss out on the blessings that are here before our very eyes. So hang in there and seek the blessings of your first Florida Christmas.

Hugs and prayers,
CarrieH

p.s., if you’re missing winter weather, we had sleet and freezing rain last evening and I had to drive 15 mph to get home from work – wanna trade? :wink:


#20

Hi Carrie–my best friend’s name is Carrie, from college days.:slight_smile:

I don’t miss freezing rain…and cold cold brrrrr temps…and driving like a snail to work…and the store, etc!!


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