Feeling lost...



Just for background, I’m a middle aged cradle Catholic, and celebrated the usual sacraments including marriage. The last couple of years have been very difficult; my marriage has fallen apart and our divorce is nearly final. This brought about a bad case of depression which has been better with treatment but is still lingering.

In the midst of all this, lately I’ve been struggling with belief in God, any kind of life after death, or any kind of meaning in life. It’s really awful.

I’m terrified about the prospect of dying one day and there just being… nothing. Honestly, though, I don’t see a logical way around it. I have a ton of questions about how God and existing past the death of the body would work. No one wants God to be real more than me but I just don’t believe right now (or let’s say I’m at 5% belief, 95% very skeptical).

Any thoughts or advice? Many thanks.


Please call your Church Parish office and tell them you need to set up a meeting with your Priest ASAP.


Hello xuanor . Believing in God. Ask God to make Himself known to you. He will. He always answers that prayer.
Being a Christian is much more than an intellectual assent to His reality. Its about having a daily relationship with Him. We’re not intended to be empty since God wants to fill his followers with His Holy Spirit.
I’m also a cradle catholic. We can learn a lot from Protestants, in their devotion to and great confidence in the Lord. Being a Catholic Christian isn’t just for Sunday morning worship. Our relationship with the Lord should be 24/7. And , of course, start to practise your faith again.


Firstly if there’s nothing you have nothing to be afraid of.

Now the good news, God is real and you have the possibility of eternal life, this is what Our Lord Jesus teaches us in the gospels. He told the truth.

I often pray to Our Lady to help me increase my faith, I’m sure this would help you to rebuild your faith too.

See your priest and have an honest chat with him.
God bless.


Without God’s free gift of Salvation through Jesus Christ you are lost.

Jesus said to him I am the way and the truth and the life no one comes to the Father but through Me.

John 14: 6

That if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead you will be saved.

For with the heart a person believes resulting in righteousness and with the mouth he confesses resulting in salvation

Romans 10. :9-10

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life

John 3.16


I’m sorry you’re going through this. I don’t have any advice right now, but I’m praying for you.


Strange. There are many in your situation who would, contrary to what you’re experiencing, be seeking God and are becoming more spiritual.

If you compare the alternative of being there is no God instead of there is God, the former is probably more difficult to explain that the latter, that is, there is God.

In any case, believing that there is God, one has nothing to lose but much to gain than by not believing. If you believe in your life and love life, then there is just too much at stake for you to believe that there is life after death. What happens after one dies?

Surely it is more than just being expired, wasted away and become nothing. Would you not want to believe that there is a life to be lived after one departs from this earth? You have nothing to lose to believe that but a whole lot of wonders and excitement to anticipate in. Imagine the pleasure and beauty of meeting God and seeing paradise? And in having those, all you need to do is to believe, which in practice will not be a difficult thing to do.


I finished a novena to St Therese tonight and included you in those prayers.
God is with you. He’s so close to you.


Very sorry to hear of the weight of your cross. I would hope that you have made an appointment with your parish priest to discuss this. As well, a good Catholic counselor can help restore your state of mind. Most important, in my mind, is to find when your parish offers adoration of Christ in the Blessed Sacrament.

Then, go and spend time in the presence of the Lord. Pay, read scripture or just gaze upon Him. Tell Him what you have told all of us. Then, be as patient with Him as He has been with you. When you are made aware that He is there, you will be changed.

Oh! Consider a copy of Fr. Benedict Groeschel’s book “Arise from Darkness.” H was a Franciscan friar, priest and clinical psychologist. Highly recommended.


My thought is that you’re in crisis and have so much on your plate right now.
I’m so sorry—you have a crushing cross to bear :cry:

Look, I could sit here and discuss apologetics and reasons for God’s existence but I won’t, because I think you’re very grieving and not necessarily in a great head space for deep apologetics.

But I do want to say, that I’m so sorry for your loss and everything you’re going through and although I don’t know you in real life, I will remember you in my prayers.

If you still are craving apologetics, I can recommend the book “Handbook of Christian Apoligetics” by Peter Kreeft.

But when I went through crushing loss, I needed the emotional support of people before I could get philosophical about it…



You aren’t going to be able to logically understand or reason out life after death, or even belief in God. There’s a significant supernatural element to these things that we access through faith and hope. The culture surrounding us in the West looks with skepticism on the supernatural side of our faith and discourages people from belief, unfortunately.

Faith and hope (hope is generally interpreted to mean hope in the life after death) are theological virtues infused into the soul by God via the Holy Spirit. Faith and hope are what you need. Pray to God to send his Holy Spirit to you to give you a big dose of both.

Pray. Pray a lot. Pray any way you feel comfortable. Prayer is the best way to connect with the supernatural, “illogical” side of God. This has been advocated by Catholics and non-Catholics alike.

Read the Gospels. Jesus vanquished death, and if you believe in Him and follow Him, you have nothing to fear from death, it’s just like a passageway into another, better life. Jesus’ entire message was that this world is temporary and kind of unimportant except for trying to serve God and love our neighbors.

And maybe talk to a priest.

If it makes you feel any better, a number of the great saints including St. Teresa of Avila and Mother Teresa of Calcutta struggled with anxiety or doubt. You have to make a big leap of putting all your faith and trust in God and not worrying. Worry changes nothing anyway.

I will pray for you.


I’ve been divorced, lost a job, and had a huge court battle to just have the right for a loving father to spend time with my son. Finances were a struggle due to the divorce and job loss. I know how alone you can feel and how dark the future can look. I was Protestant at the time and also struggling to find a church I could call mine.
Yet, I found that God was there by my side through all this. He never abandoned me. He guided me to the Catholic faith over a period of time and helped me embrace it.
Take time to pray everyday. Pray for him to bring you peace. Listen to what he may be trying to tell you. He wants you to trust in Him.
God Bless.


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