This will be my last post on CAF as I now realize I have to fight my battle alone.
I went to confession and told the priest that I didn’t think I believed in God anymore. We talked for about 45 minutes (I felt bad for other people waiting in line.) He gave me his personal experience and words of wisdom. I am very appreciative of his effort, but everything he said was all the same stuff I’ve heard. I came out of the confessional with no more faith than I did going in.
At a recent meeting at work, we had an icebreaker activity in which everybody in the room would write on a piece of paper 2 things that were important to them in life. I was shocked when I couldn’t even come up with one. Not one single lousy thing.
I’ve tried to find God and follow who I thought he was. All I have to show for it is a life in which not one damn thing is important to me.
I’ve read a lot, asked lots of questions, and listened to lots of people. But no matter how much I do, I get nowhere. Now I have to figure this out alone. Hopefully if I just hash things out one-on-one with God, we can sort things out.
Thank you all who have tried to help me. If God exists, I’m sure he will reward you for your efforts.