Fighting with one hand tied behind my back


Here’s my problem: I’m the only Catholic in my family and both my ex wife and my parents attend the same Lutheran Church; and I live with my parents.

I’m trying to teach the True Faith to my sons, eight years old; and my ex wife is of course teaching them hers. When we have discussions on faith; we of course but heads and I have to be an apologist. I don’t go full bore with my apologetics and my own personal opinions about Protestantism because I’m afraid to upset my parents.

I feel like I’m fighting with one hand tied behind my back.

Any advice?


It is not an easy situation as you are surrounded by protestants…

Is your conversion is new?

Are the children have any formal religious education in link with a Church, outside of faith formation in family?
If not, is your ex-wife will agree to let your children to attend catechism?
Are they attend to both Church religious education?

As for your parents, the situation is sensitive because I think they have a great influence on your children.
But you and the mother stay their religious educators.
So, they cannot prevent your from going with them at mass, prayed as a Catholic with them, teach them…
And you have the right to tell them to not teach their faith to them if they do it.

You live under the same roof; but you are two separate nuclear families. So the two families have to had their own boundaries.


I came into the church two years ago. After the divorce. They’ve attended Mass with me, with their mother’s permission. But they live with her and are in her church’s Sunday school. She doesn’t allow them to keep their rosaries in her house as they are, unquote; “ Not Christian “. Otherwise, we get along decently; though like I said; I have to tread carefully with my parents.

However: I will take your advice about setting my parents straight. Can’t do that with my ex wife though.


Yes, of course the situation is different with their mother and their grand parents.

It seems that your children are raised as lutheran because you are both protestants at the time of their births.

You cannot make them to switch christian confession without the agreement of the mother. (or without going at the trial.

The best you can do is, if she agreed, to give them two differents religious education. But it is up to you, because it is not easy.

You can speak to your priest to have his views and advises.
And perhaps catechism is not the weekend, so, perhaps it is possible.


Yeah; we were both Lutheran. Well, I’m accepting of the situation. But, I will stand my ground about the Faith and pray for their conversion when they get to be of age. I guess the operative phrase here is fight the good fight.

Thanks Anicette.


You’re welcome!

If you continue to teach them your faith, bring them to mass and make sure they understand it and pray for them, maybe, they will choose Catholicism when they will have the age.

It is not a guarantee, but a possibility.


:grinning: That’s What I’m going to have to do.


Maybe banning rosaries will backfire on your ex and it will be the lure of the forbidden.


Oooh, that’s good :grinning: One of my twins already wears his around me


I will add: to learn them the cultural aspect of Catholicism can be a good thing. It is very rich (art, history, liturgy, prayers, popular devotion… dogmas, the link between Bible, tradition, and the Church nowdays…)

in addition of what you ever do when you pray the rosary with them.


I haven’t prayed with them; but I have prayed it around them and told they can join in if they want.


That’s fine.
You show an exemple without force them, because they not belong to the same denomination.


That’s true. I try not to make religion a battleground, with kids in the middle; between my ex wife and I.


I admire you, because for me, that my children will left the Church will be devastating…


Thank you for your admiration. I really appreciate that. If you’d also pray for me and my boys, my ex wife is trying to evangelize her fiance’s Pagan friends by bringing them into her home; for their protection from paganism as well.


Ok, I will do that.
Paganism is perhaps the wort influence.


At least they are learning about a faith with their mother -that is important. I grew up hearing that Lutheran was almost Catholic (I was Baptist :slight_smile: ). Like others have suggested, there’s a strong possibility that they could select Catholicism when they are older. They will see how you practice your day-to-day faith a bit differently, and most likely when they are able to attend Mass, they will see and get the difference. At this point, they should be able to understand that your faith is a little different from mom’s. Don’t criticize Lutheran as that could backfire. Be the giant gentle example to them and pray.


Yes it is. My twin, the one who wears his rosary; told me he believes in God and Mother Nature. Ugh


Okay, Dlee. Thanks


ouch… syncretism!

Ask him what is “mother nature”.
Perhaps try to find a concept in Christian Theology that is close, and can substitue it.

Ask help from priest or theologian if necessary.

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