First Communion at Marriage Ceremony?


Hello, my fiancee and I are to have a sacramental marriage next year. I am baptized and have received my first communion, but not confirmed. I stopped going to mass as a teenager. However, I recently have been coming back to the faith. I have learned that I should not receive communion until I make a full confession, so I have not been receiving communion.

My fiance is not baptized and has never been part of any religion, but wants to be baptized as a Catholic and will likely do so a few months before our wedding. She would like to attend RCIA classes to facilitate this prior to our marriage.

However, since we are living together. I believe the Church teaches cohabitation is a mortal sin. If either of us are in a state of mortal sin, we should not receive communion, correct? Therefore, neither of us should receive communion until we are married and make a full confession.

She would like to have both of us receive communion on our wedding day, but given our state of being, that doesn’t seem possible, does it? Can anyone offer any guidance?



Talk to the priest in charge of your marriage prep. He can help you more than anyone here on CAF.


I have, but unfortunately he doesn’t really ever answer the question. He just keeps saying, “one step at a time” and we keep coming back to meet with him for various things to prepare for the wedding and I always ask the same question to which I receive the same answer.


Congratulations! It is wonderful that you want to live according to the Church, be closer to Jesus and have a Sacramental marriage! All great things. Clearly you are being drawn by the Holy Spirit.

So true these details need to be worked out with your priest. I’ll be praying for you and your fiancee.


Thank you Monicad :slight_smile:


When is your wedding?


The primary issue would be having relations. Cohabiting may be an issue due to scandal but given that the priest seems to know this and not mind if you cease having relations until the wedding and go to Confession beforehand you can receive with a clear conscience.


@Elf01 That’s what the priest performing our ceremony said too. The priest preparing us for the marriage is in the US and the one performing our ceremony is in my fiancee’s home country. However, because my fiancee would have not received her first communion (due to cohabitation), would she be allowed to receive first communion and the sacrament of marriage during the same ceremony? I told her I’ve never heard of anyone doing that.

@Dacinom - Next June!


If she’s going through RCIA hopefully it will be discussed then. As long as you are committed to living chastely though it should not be an issue for her to receive her First Holy Communion before the wedding.


Thanks @Elf01 for your guidance.


I was married in the Methodist church and we had communion - but it kinda sucks to know now that it wasn’t valid :frowning:


Well, alternatively you could stop cohabiting, or if that’s not possible then live as “brother and sister” under the direction of your priest.

The best person to talk to about when and whether to receive communion, go to confession, etc, would be your parish priest. Please talk about this with him and let him guide you on next steps in your marriage, RCIA, etc.

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