For fathers (New Dad needs help)


#1

Brothers and Sisters,

My wife of almost five years and I are expecting our second child this spring. We are blessed with a 2YO boy and the new baby is a girl! I thank God everyday for the many blessings He gives to me, my wife and our family.

I have to admit that I am thinking, worrying and extremely anxious about the future. We are blessed that my wife can stay home with our children while I financially support our family.

I keep praying over and over “I Trust the Lord with all my heart and mind” and I re-read the scripture which states “Do not worry about tomorrow, tomorrow will take care of itself.” Mat7:34, yet my mind continues to keep thinking about how I will provide for my growing family. I currently have a civilian goverment contract position, but it’s only good for another 24 months. On my bad days, my wife says I look very sad during what should be a great and blessed time in our life. To the fathers out there who provide(d) for your growing families, how did you or do you avoid falling into the evil of worrying about the future? Ever since we found out about our second baby I seem to think more about our uncertain financial future than the blessed present day.

Any advice on how to cope and definately your prayers would be a great help to me. Thank you.


#2

You are truly blessed with a family. Put your focus on them and soon you will not have time to worry. It is a hard thing to do for most of us dads. We are the providers and I think that we are programed to worry about our responsibility. Some people will just put some time each day to think about there worries and after that time has passed you no longer think about it. I find that when I spend time with the children that is all I think about.

I remember having my last boy four years ago. I was 48 at that time and he has down syndrome. I was overcome with worry about caring for him. I will be 66 when he turns 18. Soon after he was born the everyday love and care were enough to worry about. God loves you and them and sometimes we need to leave the worry of providing up to him. You are in good hands.


#3

I’ve raised four: three girls and a boy. I was able to work in an industry that required my overtime services for most of that time. I am good at what I do and now the only trouble I’m having is getting my foot in the door.

I never learned how to worry. I don’t want to learn now.

Matthew


#4

Give us this day our daily bread. It is very difficult for the rich to enter heaven. Why? They think they have many resources and options. The poor learn to rely on God’s providence. Trust in the Lord. Jesus, I trust in you.


#5

Are you young? Probably you are? The future will be good to you. God provides for those who are generous with life. There is an old saying, “With every baby comes a loaf of bread.” Opportunities for you to provide for your family will be presented to you.

Remember, just because your job has an endpoint in 24 months doesn’t mean you are any less secure that those who have “stable” employment. Many of those people will be unexpectedly lose their jobs.

Put this in God’s hands and realize that the worries you have are the work of the devil trying to discourage you.


#6

No matter what happens you are in God’s hands. Life holds no guarantees. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow. We have a choice to fear or trust in God no matter what we face.


#7

Teach The Children How To Laugh


#8

And enjoy them. If you are fearful you will teach them to be fearful. Jesus commands us to not worry, be anxious and to trust in Him. Will you obey Him or fear?


#9

One word:

Trust…


#10

Congratulations to you and your wife! Baby #4 is due this month for my wife and me. Very exciting times.

You’re actually in a much better position than most people. You know that in 24 months, your current employment term will end, so you have ample time to prepare and line something else up in advance (although now would be a bit early to begin looking…). In most companies, people are shocked when they lose their job, and it happens very fast. Either budget cuts or poor company performance dictates rapid termination, which usually those being cut didn’t see coming, or poor performance necessitates termination (and in many cases, those performing poorly don’t realize the gravity of their performance…) So, be thankful for your foreknowledge.

Trust in the Lord, as the scripture tells us, because He will provide. But, He may not provide in the way you think, or want. Just for you and others - be cautious about interpreting the scripture to say that you’ll have what you want. Many times we are faced with hardship, and it’s meant to strengthen us. So, be proactive about assessing your situation, and where you will go next - don’t wait for God to bring you something - He will if its in His plan. But trust that you will accept what comes your way.

We can spend all our time praying for God to give us what we want (or think we need), or, we can spend our time praying that we will be able to accept what God provides. I prefer to pray for acceptance, as in that case, we’re always satisfied!


#11

Teme and others,

Thank you for that advice and prayers. I ask that by God’s grace I will learn to let go and let God’s will be done. I know He loves me and He will allow me to provide for my family in whatever way He sees fit.

I am in the process of looking at alternatives for the future but they all require huge amounts of $$$$$$$ to move forward. Applying for the bank loans is not what scares me as much as how we will get by until a new business venture makes enough money to pay myself a salary. My profession is such that being an employee in the private sector would not support my family. I know that we are so much more blessed than others and I almost feel guilty to be asking for more. I just want to be the best husband and father that I can be and that includes providing for my family.

I know and trust that God will let me know when the choice is the one for my family. I feel so blessed that I found this website to lift me up when I stumble.


#12

As a husband and a father of 4 (baby just born 2 months ago) I can tell you that faith and trust in our Lord does amazing things. My wife stays at home and I work 2 jobs. Not the most glorious life, but we make do with what we have. We do our best to live a simple life. To needs before wants. Carpe Diem! We live for the day that we have been given by God. The time that we get as a family is too precious to worry about what will happen in the future. If I spent all my time worrying I would miss my son’s growing enthusiasm for the outdoors. My daughter looking into my eyes as if I am the king that can protect her through anything as she tells me “you are the best dad I could ask for.” Or my next son, learning to count and how you have to push the coffee table next to the couch for a safer jump. And my baby, I would miss his first smile, his wandering eyes discovering me and his new world. Sieze the day my friend. God bless you and your wife and your children.


#13

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