For non-Catholic friends, remember their departed loved one's anniversary

When we ask how we can share our faith with others, we know that friends and co-workers loose loved ones, we see the obituaries and find out their names and the dates they passed, why not remember them on the anniversary of their passing? It’s a very Catholic thing to do, and when we comment to that person that we remember their loved one today, 1 year later, often they are very touched by the kindness.

Maybe they don’t want to hear we’re praying for them. Unbelievers don’t really like to be told that. BUT to remember a loved one, that they are not forgotten, is something I think most people would appreciate. Maybe if we aren’t the best of friends, that can smooth over some of hard feelings, some remembered past hurts.

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What’s the worst that could happen?

Aside from then bursting out in tears and running away sobbing hysterically, that is…

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It’s a nice thing to remember them.
But unless you know the living person very well, and know they will be okay with you bringing up the death a year later, just pray for them without letting them know.
Of course if they bring up the death anniversary first, you can say comforting words.

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Sometimes I bring up the anniversary of my deceased mother and share my feelings, and that causes them to open up about their deceased loved ones.

I guess I’m the quirky one, I’ve been doing this for years. I’m ok with tears if there’s a few. Usually they are really happy to talk about that person in their life and how they miss them. It’s like they get some relief from ‘having permission’ to express their loss.

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I have had a couple of people say to me “Thank you, you are the only one that said a word to me about it.”

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I guess I’m just odd then, but unless someone is either my really good friend or my husband’s really good friend, I don’t want people bringing up his death. It’s personal to me. I will act polite if people do bring it up because I know they mean well, but internally I’ll be praying for patience and wishing folks would MYOB.

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