It’s so hard when we want someone to forgive us. I’m sorry for the pain you feel. At least to *give *forgiveness we have some control, it our decision, but the reverse is so painful.
I don’t doubt that Jesus has forgive your sincere heart. I ask Him to help you to feel His embrace…if even through us.
There’ve been times I’ve longed for someone’s forgiveness, like when I wrote this…
Blessing and forgiveness
I forgive you, anyone who ever hurts or judges me. Will you forgive me? Will you forgive my faults that annoy you? Will you forgive what I am or what you judge me to be? Will you forgive my kindly meant mistakes?
In spirit, I kneel to ask forgiveness for good intentions gone awry. Perhaps you will not forgive or perhaps you will never inform me if you do forgive, yet I mean only kindness to others and to you. If I lose your friendship, I still love and pray for you and those with you.
Some day I will die and never again make mistakes that cause others hurt. I take comfort that those who cannot forgive or understand my motives must do so then. Until then your judgements of me — as the person, you deem me or the wrong you believe of me—remain until God who loves us can speak some kindness and perhaps even some truth in your heart for me.
“I bless you. I bless your thoughts and feelings. I bless your family, I bless your ventures, and I bless your life.” The power of those words is God’s not mine. I only bless you in God’s name, for He loves you profoundly.
I forgive you, where there are things to forgive even if you never acknowledge them and or do not value me even enough to see them. How can I blame you? I place you in God’s care and ask His threefold blessing for you. 1999-05
Dear Mother Mary, you surely felt devastated when you heard the children of other mothers were slaughtered because you gave birth to Jesus. Please intercede that I never be cause of hurt to anyone because of misunderstanding or the ill will of others.