Forever unemployed

Hi. So I have super bad social/other anxiety and have been unemployed for years now. I’m actually 26, male, live with my parents and can barely go outside let alone make phone calls and schedule interviews. It’s not like I can just “tough it out” either- I’ve actually had immobilizing panic attacks where my heart beats fast and gets tight… Thought I was going to die… But… I’m working on it and I am a lot better than I used to be. I do see serious progress. However… What I could use right now is a job in a super quiet, spiritual place without much social interaction. Cleaning floors? Anything.

So- I was wondering if anyone could help me with that. I do live in California but, as I dislike my life here, I’m willing to move out of state. Does anyone know any monasteries, parishes or anything that I could look into?

Aaaaaand thanks for reading

Look into the Trappists. They don’t even speak to one another and brew some excellent beer.

Welcome to the forum! :wave:

If you’re looking for work with Catholic entities, try or You can search by geographical area and also by type of position. In high school, I worked maintenance at my old Catholic grade school. Lots of sweeping the floors and taking out the garbage when the building was otherwise empty. Something like that might appeal to you. :o

Praying to St. Joseph for you to find employment & praying for you to overcome your anxiety. Have you sought medical help for your anxiety disorder? There are meds available for such that do help.

Have you ever considered priesthood? I think your personality is a gift in that can be used for good. We need folks like you. And I guarantee God will cure you in the process because people will respect and look up to you.

I used to be the same I way in college and high school. I now work in IT so that I can work independently for the most part. I’d avoid meds if I were you. Xanax and those types of meds cause dependency.

Because you posted and expressed yourself rather well, it seems there is real hope you can overcome your anxieties. It will take time and effort and assistance. But a journey begins with one step and continues with many more. You are taking steps already.

I see three approaches. 1. Get a thorough physical evaluation to rule out some disease being the cause of your current situation. 2. Get a mental evaluation to see if there is a pattern of thought that can be addressed through counseling or prescribed drugs. 3. Seek out a Spiritual Advisor. Pray for God’s Good Grace to overcome this. Attend Mass as often as you can. Daily if you can.

With better understanding of the cause of your anxiety, you will be better able to overcome it.

I know Goodwill Easter Seals used to do some evaluations, work with people with various kinds of disabilities, both physical and mental.

There are also rehabilitation places that help find work for people, vocational rehabilitation.
In New York State, one was called VESID.

There are kinds of work one can even do from the house, typing, for example, which you already seem to be able to do, like data entry.

Thanks for the nice replies guys… You understand! It’s hard for people like me to even check responses on the internet from people. Anything outside of Christian communities is really difficult for me right now… That might be another reason for my anxiety is that I don’t have confidence as a Christian due to mostly affiliating with the secular world. It’s strange to see nice replies to my honesty for once. But yeah, thanks! I’ll try to reply to everyone.

I have always wanted to do something like that! I’m pretty much a hermit in solitude right now anyways. I spend a lot of my time reading New Advent about the depths of Catholicism- everything from heresies like Arianism or ideas like Gnosticism to the detailed natures of transubstantiation and implications of the Council of Nicaea. I pray a lot. I write a lot of stories and poetry and live in the world of imagination, trying to reflect my Christian morality and aesthetics. I wasn’t really sure if organizations like that still existed in modern times- I’ve looked into the Jesuits and such due to my interest in the political implications of Christianity. That definitely sounds like something I’d be interested in except one thing- I have a girlfriend that I intend to marry. I couldn’t live there full time, which is why I was looking more for work.

Thanks for the welcome and thanks for the links- I’ll check those websites out for shore.

Thanks for the prayers. I haven’t sought medical help because I’ve too much anxiety to even save my life. I was in the military for a while though, and with all the checkups and blood tests and such, the only thing they noted about me was ‘pre-hypertension due to anxiety’. No chest xrays or anything like that. Maybe someday I’ll get it in me to visit a cardiologist.

I have considered the priesthood, a lot, but I definitely feel nowhere near ready for that sort of thing, and I’ve also a girlfriend that I plan on marrying. I don’t know what exactly married men can do in the Church as far as vocations but I’d guess priest and monk (my favorite!) are out of the question.

And yeah- I’d prefer to avoid medication. I feel like prayer and counseling work enough for myself personally.

I’ll have to go with #3 on that one due to the reasons I answered above. I am utterly terrified of doctors. I’d probably die just sitting in that waiting room. I find that prayer and a very holy lifestyle really help me overcome the anxiety and help me see why I have the psychological problems that I do, and help give me confidence.

I’ll look into those. Thank you!

I know exactly what you mean! A lot of times when I stick up for Gods word on a secular blog or website I FEAR reading my responses because I know I will get hurt or sometimes even provoked to anger. I get ridiculed and made out to be a some kind of numbskull that believes in fairy tails. It begs the question “why torture myself?” It’s because I know my just reward is in heaven. Just keep putting yourself out into the world. Accept the crucifixion against you and take pleasure in the fact that you have a ETERNAL reward in heaven that can’t be lost like a job can.

I have considered the priesthood, a lot, but I definitely feel nowhere near ready for that sort of thing, and I’ve also a girlfriend that I plan on marrying. I don’t know what exactly married men can do in the Church as far as vocations but I’d guess priest and monk (my favorite!) are out of the question.

A deacon can marry as long as he is married beforehand.

If I were in your position I’d go to Haiti and volunteer for anything I was given to do. In fact if the Lord should decide to call my wife, I’d do the same. Taking nothing of value, and placing your fate in the Lord, and dedicating your life for others will definitely reveal your calling to you. From then, if you should decide not to stay, you will still have your positive answer.

God desires that we deny ourselves and put our trust in Him, and making ourselves available to better the lives of others does this, as well as being a good sign of predestination.

Excellent idea!!!
Build Coffins all day,
Drink Beer,
that will sure man you up.
You’ll start to speak your mind,
you’ll accomplish things.

After that you could then go on to become a Diocesan Priest with your new found courage.

Sure wish I was 26 and single, I’d become a Priest too, maybe a MaryKnoller, then I’d sign up for the International Catholic Association Of Exorcists cause by then my Courage and Faith will be able to kick the Devil’s butt.

With the internet, there are potential jobs that do not require face to face contact or even phone calls. My girlfriend’s sister is a supplier of goods. She buys items online and then sells them via ebay to people in other countries where the items cannot be purchased. She makes money on the shipping.

You you good at writing? You can write articles freelance.

The thing with monasteries is that, even at Trappist monasteries, you will still be around people and have to talk occassionally.

Praying for you. Also, check out the Mt Carmel Hermitage in Christoval, TX.

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