Not sure what I am looking for here, maybe advice, support, encouragement, whatever. You are all so wonderful so I figured this would be a good place to talk about my confusion, anxiety, eagerness, etc.
I am 34 years old, single, never married with no children. I am a teacher, been working with children for over 15 years. Currently I work with special needs kids. I very much long to be a wife and a mother. However, meeting the man of my dreams has yet to happen. I am very happy, blessed with a wonderful family and many wonderful friends. I keep myself busy and active. So you are all wondering where the title (foster care) comes in.
For quite a few years I have had a desire to do foster care. Of course I always thought this would be something I would pursue when I was married with children of my own. Last year the calling became much stronger so I started to take the classes. After the 3rd or 4th class I scared myself out of it and quit the classes. I told myself I would pray more about it and possibly restart the classes in the Spring. So I ended up taking the classes and finished in June. During the process I sold my place and bought a new one. In the transition I had to put my licensing on hold (had to live somewhere temporarily while place was being finished etc.). Then my caseworker had to take time off for health reasons etc. Well now I have an appointment to finish up everything on Tuesday, which means I could be ready in a few weeks or so. So you would think I would be excited right? Nope now the fear is setting in, I go through all the what ifs. I know God will not give me more than I can handle, yet I can’t help but worry. Some of the things that come to mind are…
What affect will this have on my dating life, will guys find it strange or cool that I am doing this?
What if I do this and cannot handle it?
What if a child is placed with me and causes me to miss a ton of work?
Of course there are other concerns, but I am curious what you think about the above. Sorry for the long post.