Fraternal Correction- When am I obliged?


#1

I’m having trouble with two of the requirements which are a reasonable hope that the correction will be heeded or that the sinner will amend their ways and if someone else is more qualified and likely to correct them.

So for example, right now, in my church group, I see some girls wearing tight pants or immodest clothing, maybe not that immodest. And one of the group coordinators has a facebook page which I follow where she dresses quite immodest and posts pictures of it on her profile. So my question is, am I obliged to correct them? I don’t have much rapport with them, only know them from the group and don’t talk much with them.

And there is a Priest that frequents our meetings so he is more qualified to correct them although maybe not likely to do it? And all of them are nice Catholics who are trying to grow. Maybe my correction might do them good but I don’t know. Maybe they will think I’m too strict and of course, the church has no set rules for modesty which makes it hard to tell them anything.


#2

Yeah, you tell them. Please be sure to let us know how that goes :grimacing:


#3

I guess maybe it’d be better to tell the group coordinators to talk about modesty and chastity than to be outright and tell the girls there.


#4

I think you should honestly let it go. This is not the hill you want to die on.


#5

Usually if you’re going to “correct” somebody, you better either have some authority to do so (for example, if you were the pastor or the group leader, you could set guidelines for what clothing is and is not appropriate) or else you should know them pretty well first.

You don’t just walk up to strangers in a group you have joined and start lecturing them about their clothing. They probably won’t listen to you. There’s also a significant possibility that your own standards for modesty may be too extreme.

I’d suggest that you focus on getting to know the people as people and ignore what they are wearing for now. You can wear what you yourself think is modest and sets a good example. It doesn’t sound like their clothing is driving you bonkers with lust being around them. Just ignore it for now and focus on your own clothing, your own spiritual life, and don’t go correcting other people you don’t know.


#6

Assuming you’re not a troll – check your profile. You’re either messing around with your listed religion, or you’ve shared your password by mistake.


#7

No, don’t correct them. It would be really quite bizarre for you to go up to people you’ve never really spoken to and try to tell them they need to dress more modestly. It may well give them the wrong impression of you and what your intentions are.


#8

??? What do you mean?


#9

I think the OP is a female. Not that it would make the behavior any more appropriate.


#10

People also have differing standards of what is modest. They may be dressed perfectly fine, but it just doesn’t suit your standards. And in general, it’s really not good form to offer unsolicited advice to strangers.

For example, a lot of people here believe in skirts/dresses only for women. If someone at my parish whom I do not know came up to me and made a remark about me wearing pants, I’d tell them to get lost.


#11

Well, either your religion is batman0713, or you’ve posted your password.


#12

i reset my password. thanks for letting me know. I also contacted the moderator as I have no clue why it said that since I haven’t even edited my profile with any personal information. I don’t know what happened.


#13

I’ve seen it happen before. Glad you got it changed.


#14

Fraternal correction is best reserved for those issues where you know others will have your back, like if you see someone litter, or in instances of perceived racism/sexism.

Issues of immodest clothing or sexual morality are best handled with accompaniment.


#15

Your religion is still your password. As well as reset your password, you need to put down what your religion is. All the best.


#16

You are obliged when you are the peer or in authority over the person.


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