Friend with Depression


I just had a very emotional conversation with a very good friend. She is suffering from depression. She recently went through a break-up after 12 years in a relationship. It was unhealthy in every way. They were engaged, and lived together most of that time (no children). Anyway, her self-esteem is so very low. She is a beautiful, intelligent person and just can’t get past the sadness. She isn’t longing for her past relationship, but is feeling the effects of having been verbally/emotionally abused. She is seeng a counseler (has been for 2yrs) and I talked her into getting back on anti-depression med.
I just don’t know what else to do for her. She will sit at home all weekend and not leave or call anyone. She told me if she wasn’t Christian she may have already hurt herself.
She seems to think she such a bad person and I told her to give all to Him and just let go. She is having such a hard time doing that. What can I do? And, then I feel guilty because I have a loving husband and beautiful child. I just want to help her. I do and will continue to pray for her, but there has to be something else…
She is 35 and single and alone and that hurts her so much. She wants to be in a happy, healthy relationship. I feel so sad that I can’t help her…
By the way she is not Catholic, but Lutheren.
Thanks for advice or experience you may have with this type of situation.


Pray and sacrifice for her. Keep encouraging her to see her mental health professional. (and take her meds if she’s on them)


KCT is right. This is not a situation you can change or control. The best thing for you to do is to listen to her and keep being her friend.


I don’t have much experience with depression, but I will pray for her when I get time. You two should take time off and go do what she wants to do, have fun, maybe going get some ice cream. What you can do is prove that she isn’t worthless. Somehow give her hope (yea good advice :rolleyes: you already know this). A girl I really like, recently got rejected at prom (not quite as big of a deal) but I am trying to prove to her why she is totally worth it.

If there is a place like a soup kitchen, get her involved. Help her step out of her normal life, and show her that she can serve those in need. Serving always gives me hope.

I hope for the best. :gopray2:


She is going to hurt for a while, and there is nothing anyone can do to take that away or speed up the process. She just has to go through it. She is mourning.

When she’s doing a little better, you might want to point out to her that if she really wants to be in a healthy relationship, she needs to start making the kind of choices that lead to that. As in, different from the choices she has been making.


Continue to be her friend. Continue to pray for her. I will too.

This time will pass, when she is ready to go forward. She will.


My wife of 18 years has suffered from depression since she was a teenager. The one bit of advice that I can offer is to be steadfast in your friendship. Continue to see your friend and be supportive. Continue to encourage her and ALWAYS remind her that periods of depression are finite. She will have good times again even. Remind her of that again and again.


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