Hallo to all. I am a 21 year old male student, and I have a ‘girl problem’. First, I must state that I am not looking for marriage, although I believe that the best spouse is someone who is likewise your best friend (co-conspirator so to speak ;)). Yes, I am quite young and do not have a steady income. In short, I am looking for a young woman who would be a closer- than-best friend, who I could eventually marry when the time is right.
First, let me tell you the the problems surrounding my search.
I have never been in a romantic relationship, although this did not bother me for some time, especially since I ‘knew’ that I would meet a young woman who, quoting St John Zlatoust, would be ‘of the same mind’. However, as it is quite evident, I neglected to gain any experience when dealing ‘intimately’ with the opposite sex in the past 21 years (attending an all-male high school during my adolescence did not help). Furthermore, in my adolescence, I was convinced that I should become a priest. Long deliberation, prayer, guidance, and general vocational examination indicated a vocation other than priesthood. Frankly, even during my ‘priestly’ phase, I felt much more at peace when considering myself as a ‘family man’). However, to summarise, the ‘environmental’ odds are against me.
Now for my problems (the good part).
What qualities do I look for?
As I have mentioned I desire a young woman of the same mind. For me this is the most important aspect of the future marriage (less tension and children are raised similarly by both parents). I am not fixated on looks. My standards are that she be no more and no less physically attractive than myself.
Now, what are the qualities of the aforementioned marital ‘hive-mind’?
First, as my information indicates, I am a Roman Catholic. Naturally, she would also need to be Roman Catholic. Normally the problem would end here. However, that is only half of my background. I am the American-born son of Polish immigrants with the remainder of my family overseas. I travelled extensively (annually if not more frequently) to Poland since I was a few months old. At home I was raised bilingually. But perhaps more importantly, the Poland I experienced in my childhood induced certain tastes, inclinations etc. toward the ‘communist’ landscape and to the Slavic world. Most importantly, it is my fatherland. Likewise, in light of the erosion of the familiar landscape after 2004 (EU membership, for better or worse), I became something of a political and social reactionist (please don’t question, this is merely a self-description). As for any spouse, etc., I would want for her to share the same sentiment so as to have ‘emotional’ companionship, but also for my children to have the same experiences as I had during my wonderful childhood.
Enough of my spiel. Now for the question aimed the good posters.
With all of this information in mind, where must I search for this like-minded young woman? I am not the most social of animals, but I am hardly a shut-in. However, in light of the unusual characteristics that I have described, where does one even begin to look? I am not desperate for a relationship, however, I simply do not know where to even begin looking. Furthermore, after university, I will be quite busy (hopefully) to really engage myself in the ‘chase’. Oh, and one last thing. Youth in Poland still marry (and largely stay married) at younger ages than American youth (think mid-to late 20s).
Is my ‘clock’ ticking? No, as far as I know. But emotional dismay does begin to set in when all of your cousins have already married (no divorces, thank God).