God comes first - asking Him to make decision for us


As of the title, we’re always been told that any decision we make, God should comes first. We should put Him above anything and make our choices according. When asked how, people will say “just pray”.

My question is, how do we know what God wants us to do after we pray? How do we know that our decision is not our own but rather what God wants us to do? Often we don’t hear another voice whispering in our ear. Erm, anyone got what I mean?

Like er… a person wanted to study this course because he likes it. Then he pray to God to help him to make decision. After praying, he still decides what he likes best. Aren’t that making decision himself?

Or say a Catholic Student Society leader praying to God asking what should he do on the next gathering. Then he think of what is the best thing to do according to his personal opinion. Aren’t that depending on himself too?

So how exactly do we “let God/Jesus make the choice for us?”

totally confused / lost.


Well, I think this is a really good question. I believe that there are a lot of people who wonder the same thing, they just don’t verbalize it. I guess a short quick answer could be something along these lines. When making a decision about something it is always good to look at your heart first, what are your true intention towards the decision you have to make. Does your heart line up with what God teaches or is it contrary to it? Many times what we want to do is and can be what God wants us to do. For sure we are not going to be 100 percent sure all the time but I find that along the way God will start to confirm rather it is of Him or not.

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And lean not on your own understanding.
In all your way acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

In walking with the Lord sometimes the lesson we need to learn are in the making of the wrong decision. Trusting in Him in the good and the bad decisions now that is a life lesson. He wants us to make the choices, it is in following and fellowshipping with Him that He helps us learn to make those choices.
May God provide you with the answer you are seeking…:slight_smile:


From the book “The God of Our Deepest Longings” by Peter Van Breemen, S.J.

The oft-used word “spirituality” basically refers to what we do with our longing, both in the fulfillment we experience when it materializes, as well as in the pain we feel when it doesn’t. Spirituality above all confronts us with the basic question: How much does our longing coincide with the will of God?

…………Thus we inevitably come to the question: What is our genuine and deep longing?
The answer we give this question is important, because it is in this deepest longing that
we can recognize God’s will………

For Ignatius, our deepest longing is identical with the will of God. To his mind this was crucial. ………Ignatius was convinced that we must find this will of God in our own hearts. …………The imaginary story occurs in Rome at the time when Ignatius was superior general of the young Jesuit order. By this time several colleges were already being run by the Fathers. Two of these institutions had an urgent need for an extra Jesuit to take care of business. One college was in Venice, where the Order was beloved by the people; the other was in Naples, where the brethren were despised and defamed on all sides, and their life and work had become extremely wearisome. Both colleges announced their needs to the General and begged him to send them someone. But Ignatius had only one candidate available. How could he determine where this one member of the Order should be assigned in keeping with God’s will?

Ignatius was convinced that the answer could only be found in the heart of the candidate himself. So he called the candidate in and said that he planned to send him to one of the two colleges. He then described exactly the situation in the two cities. Before the Jesuit could spontaneously realize which of the two colleges he felt more drawn to, Ignatius sent him off to the chapel to pray for three hours, asking God for inner freedom before the two possibilities. Ignatius calls it “holy indifference”; the attitude of heartfelt readiness to accept either alternative. When after three hours the Jesuit returned to him, Ignatius asked him whether he had really relinquished his own will. The candidate replied that he sincerely thought that in this matter he was inwardly free of his own wises.
Then Ignatius said to him: “And now tell me what you really want?” And that settled it.
The saint’s secretary commented: “Ignatius knew someone had completely renounced his own will, coincides precisely with the will of God for this person.”

Notice the last key sentence.
As long as we truly seek God’s will, have prayed and have used our God given wisdom, we can make our decisions by following the peace in our hearts.
We don’t have to over-analyze or second guess ourselves.


In many simple decisions like the ones you describe, God leaves us free to choose either of two good choices.

If you take a simple decision to prayer (a situation where neither decision would be sinful, and the consequences of making a “wrong” decision would not be serious), and if you don’t get a clear indication from God that one is preferable, you can make your decision based on what you think is best. God gave you the intelligence to do so; you can pretty much assume that your choice is in line with God’s will, as long as you are not making a sinful or selfish choice.

If the decision is much more serious (where you think making the wrong decision could have grave consequences), sometimes it is a good idea, in addition to prayer, to discuss the options with a trusted friend or advisor before making your decision.

God doesn’t usually answer us in “words.” Sometimes His answer is a feeling of profound peace when you have made the right decision, or a feeling of discomfort or anxiety if the decision we are leaning toward is the wrong one.

Or sometimes reading Scripture for a little while may give you an indication of what God’s will might be, when you read a phrase that gives you special insight into your decision. God can definitely speak to us through His word in the Bible.


thanks everyone. but im curious, what did the candidate of Ignatius choose at the end?

and another thing is, God doesn’t speak to us like what He used to in the Old Testament, to Abraham, Jeremiah and Moses anymore?

There are times we made wrong decision like our career or courses in college, we can’t turn back time but we regretted. what should we do about it?


If there is no turn back, once we made a choice, we just have to make the best out of it .
If it is not too late to change, for example, the deadline of dropping the course has not been passed, then quickly make the correction.

It is important to pray for wisdom before making critical decisions. Consulting with a trusted wise friend, mentor or adviser is also very important. Often times when we articulate our concerns, things become clear in our minds. And others’ opinions help us to view things from different angles. It also helps to write down on a piece of paper for all the pros and cons among the choices and look at them black and white.


i am on my final year already. going to finish soon. recently struck in my mind before i take this course, mother opposed it, thinking it won’t make any good money. another thing is im from an asian family and from asian country (I’m not American. I just found this website quite ‘interesting’) which ‘competitions’ are ‘important’. So there are so called ‘noble’ course which is medical or science or lawyer which is believed that ‘can make good money’. I insisted to take design course because take time I don’t care how much money I can make from it, I want it because I want it. After few years, I failed to be the top student of my course. Which according the “competitive family”, I have failed.

Basically I’ve hurt the “pride” of my mother. Relatives with their sons and daughters are taking so called “noble” course (medical, lawyer, etc) and I’m not.

So looking back, I scare I have been ‘selfish’ with my decisions because I do not think about parent’s feeling. So yeah, sometimes it still struck my mind “what if my past years decision is not what God wants me to do”.


This is one place that having an active prayer life can be helpful. It’s more likely then that a person can recognize the Real peace in their heart.

Maybe that decision was the right one and maybe not. Only you along with Him can decide that, and additionally what is the best thing to do now. Maybe He wanted you to learn humility due from this experience or maybe He wanted you to learn how important the 4th Commandment is or maybe…


Just always do the most charitable thing to do. Obey the commandments, fulfill all your daily duties faithfully, and make love your aim and goal in everything you do. For things that need more discernment that are too difficult for you to figure out, get a spiritual director - the voice of God will be speaking to you through him.


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