Good bye home...good bye family?



I’m struggling with this idea…

Should a men, or woman leave their home, city and family to move to another city or country, because of the high chances to get a better job? Or because of a girlfriend or boyfriend that he/she may have knew through the internet? Or any other thing like that?

Maybe the family need this person so much…maybe not…

I would like to know your opinion about this issue.



It depends how far and how easily one can return in the event of an emergency. I have family living in another country, but they’re only a 24 hour drive from home. I live 7 hours away from my family, Last summer I lived a 3 day drive from my family. I can get away with that though, because I’m living the single life right now.

It’s common for people now to re-locate. There isn’t really anything wrong with it.


I see...

Actually I have a girlfriend that live in another city :blush: and she break up with me because of that...she feels that we are doing something wrong....

I'll graduate this year and I was planning to move to her city...from my city to her city is about 6 hours by plane :blush: is a little far...

I don't know what to do I think she is convicted about this...I think this is normal because my mom live in another country too, you know my parents are divorced..theses things are normal for me...but...



As an immigrant myself, I moved to another country for a better job opportunity and better personal economics. When I planned my move I was single. The process took time that I already had a girlfriend by the time my papers were approved. I got my residency, returned home, proposed, got married, now here with my wife.

It depends on the entire situation of course. Some families do need the child to be with them to support the aging parents. My parents are well off, they’ve saved enough for retirement. I know other people don’t have the same situation. But sometimes even if the parents need the support of the children, migrating could be a better solution because the child earns more, thus have more income to share with the parents.


Nothing wrong with moving away for a job or to have more opportunity for happiness in my opinion. Given modern communication (phone, internet, etc.) and travel (air planes) we are never really that far from home. However, I would strong caution anyone moving because of someone they only know online. It seems impulsive to pull up stakes for someone you don’t really know.


Yeah I know it can be dangerous but I’ve already gone there in my last vacation to meet that girl. She is real :smiley:

No problem she is very catholic too…she is just a little complicated…

So everybody thinks that it’s fine to move…nice…I think too, I just don’t know why she thinks it is not…



Am I understanding correctly that you have a girlfriend you've only met once, and are considering uprooting your life to move and be near her? And she thinks this is a bad idea?

If she broke up with you and doesn't want you to move to where she is, I think there's your answer.


listen to Katie!


Yes Katie you understood correctly…

So…I should stay here with my family and in my city…

Maybe is God plan for me…but I loved her so much…she is best girlfriend I ever had…



*Hoje longe muitas léguas
Numa triste solidão
Espero a chuva cair de novo
Para eu voltar pro meu sertão

Quando o verde dos teus olhos
Se espalhar na prantação
Eu te asseguro não chore não, viu
Que eu voltarei, viu
Meu coração*



Are you from brazil too?

nice text, I'll reflect on it...thanks


music e lyrics:


[quote="filipea, post:11, topic:235377"]
Are you from brazil too?


No, I'm from the US - in fact I've never been to Brazil, but I'd love to visit! I discovered your wonderful country when I became fascinated with "a rainha dos baixinhos". We had Romper Room and Mister Rogers Neighborhood, but you had Xou da Xuxa - the greatest kids' show ever created.

nice text, I'll reflect on it...thanks

I like this version:


Then it’s really not even up for consideration- you are no longer together, so moving out there to be near her would be pointless, in addition to making her very uncomfortable.

I’m sorry that you lost her, but perhaps you were a little bit too intense. If I only met someone once and he decided to move 6 hours by plane to be near me, I would be very scared and would react the same way she did.

Yes, stay there with your family.


I pursued my love across 10,000 miles. That was a 32-hour plane ride. After two years, we finally could afford to get together and now live together. I am ever so sorry that this happened to you. I feel that love completes a person and it is unfair to expect a person to give up on it because of geographical restrictions. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

If you don’t fight for your love, you may regret it. You may always think “what if”. Better to fail than never try.

And there are planes if your family needs you. 6 hours isn’t all that long. I wish you the best of luck <3


Yeah I just met her once, but I've talked with her every day on the internet...we talked about everythig...we even talked about marriage and family..babies..maybe I do scared her a little...

Yeah I think we should fight for our love...thanks for your adivice...but maybe I've already fight a lot...I went there where she lives to met her...I porpurse myself to move to another city..all this things to facilited our dating...and maybe a future marriage....

I think I just leave it in the Lord's hand...



that might be a necessity, or going to college is another good reason to leave home, so of course would be entering seminary or a religious order.

Or because of a girlfriend or boyfriend that he/she may have knew through the internet? Or any other thing like that?

It’s my generation but I think this is dumber than spit.
I cannot conceive of a stupider thing for anyone to do.

Maybe the family need this person so much…maybe not…

I would like to know your opinion about this issue.


this I am not sure what you mean. If you mean the young adult is the sole support of the family yes they should take their obligations into account. In America at least until recently the prevailing view has been that young people usually leave home and start their own lives for college and job, certainly when they get married it is time to start a new home and family. A lot of that of course depends on family background, culture and ethnicity.


The more you break up the family, the farther you live apart, the worse it is.

The family should stay together as much as possible, generation and generation, all together.

Before marriage a person should guard the heart.

Marriage is all about family. A person should not only be thinking about one other person when marrying, but about the entire family.


You know what I feel that I should stay…I live with my grandmother she is sick…I’m very helpfull to her…I don’t have my parents near to me(they are divorced, and my mom live in europe) but I have my grandmother…and I have a church where I teach the word of God to the children and where I play bass in the mass…

I agree family should stay together…maybe my mom wouldn’t went to europe…but I have to make a diference and stay here…I don’t know…

It was a stupid choise to move near to her?:blush: I don’t know I’m 24 I have a lot to learn yet…but it was not a dumb thing to ask for help here…:thumbsup:



Before marriage a person should guard the heart.

what do you mean about this?


It means, be careful about who you fall in love with, and be completely sure that they love you too, before giving up everything for them.

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