Graces at holiday meals and remembering the deceased


Hello all,

Now that Fall is upon us, I have been thinking about Thanksgiving and Christmas drawing near. In the last couple of years it has been my habit to compose a special grace prayer for each holiday dinner.

That being said, and having lost an uncle just 3 weeks ago, I was thinking about calling to mind - as part of the saying of grace - those we’ve lost in our family.

Does anybody else do this? I am concerned, of course, about it “bringing the mood down.”



I think it’s a good idea to remember them after every Grace Before and After Meals, especially during the holidays!! They are still a part of your family!

My family and my husband’s family raised us with the tradition of saying our Grace Before and After and ending them with, “And may the souls of the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.” We still do that!

I sorry to hear about your uncle. I hope this helps! God bless.


I absolutely love this idea…My husband and I have never done this, no…but, what a marvelous thought. Thank you for sharing this with us. *


We do this for our daily grace.

My husband lost two of his younger brothers to cancer in the last ten years and my mother died last year. We’ve also lost a variety of other relatives, neighbors, friends, and co-workers. And there’s our own baby who died before birth. We frequently remember those who have recently died as well as others on birthdays, and special events.

And while the mention of deceased persons can be rather bittersweet, it usually makes us feel better overall to have remembered them.


My family gives thanks for their health and of course if my family has lost a relative a prayer for them .In the past year ,I lost both my grandfathers and at the holiday time that obviously hurts the most .


Everyone in my wife’s family always said grace before meals ending in that way.


Thanks all for your replies! I forgot about the after-meal grace. Perfect way to remember them, perhaps without stirring up people’s sorrow by naming them as in a litany. Thanks again.


we’ve done this and my mother always starts crying and than she gets in this mood which bothers me…But I do think it is a nice idea as long as my mother’s not at the table:)

closed #9

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit