Grandmother-in-law died today


#1

My husband’s grandmother has been in and out of hospitals for the past several years, and this morning, while I was at First Friday Mass, she died. My husband is to sing at her funeral and serve as pall bearer. We have a long history of religious tension with my husband’s parents who are Methodist (and the funeral will be at a Methodist church). Please will you all pray for her soul and for everything to go well with us at the funeral. Any advice about funerals in the Methodist tradition or dealing with this tension would be appreciated. My MIL almost refused to go to our wedding because she didn’t want to “set foot in a Catholic Church.” Thank you all for your prayers!


#2

I’m sorry for your family’s loss.

I don’t know your DH’s family, but I can tell you that attacking someone else’s religion in church during a funeral service would be considered a MAJOR faux pas for a Methodist so I doubt there would be an open confrontation. That being said, people who are grieving do and say stupid things either out of their own grief or because they think grieving gives them cover to vent. I’d just be prepared to take things with a grain of salt.

As for the order of service, you don’t say if they’re United or Free Methodist, so it depends. At every UMC funeral I ever attended there was a period of visitation with the body in the church for the public, then a few private moments for the family before the casket is closed. The service itself will probably be pretty simple: an opening hymn, pastor will say a few words (it’s doubtful that the pastor will give a full blown sermon, but it’s not unheard of), another hymn, someone else will give the eulogy, family members and friends will testify about and share memories of the deceased (you won’t be forced to), a closing hymn will be sung and you’ll be dismissed. I’ve never heard of communion being offered at a UMC funeral.


#3

Thank you so much for the information. Yes, it is a United Methodist church where her funeral will be held.


#4

Thank you all for your prayers. Everything went perfectly, and we ended the day by spending time visiting with my in-laws. We had a really lovely visit with the extended family, and no bad feelings at all :). And of course, above all, thank you for your prayers for Grandmother’s soul. Her husband was a Freemason, and their joint grave marker has a Masonic symbol on it :frowning: So we stormed Heaven and will continue to do so.


#5

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