Had dinner tonight at my aunt's house. The guest list reflected today's modern society

Guest list: my cousin and his gay partner; my other cousin and his live in girlfriend who happens to be divorced with two kids; my aunts sister who is divorced; my brother, who cheats on his girlfriend whenever he can, and my aunts father who never attends Mass; and a few church going catholics.

NOT being judgmental, just an observation how a few catholic families at a gathering reflect today’s secular culture.

I hope you set a good example and asked them if you could say Grace+

it would be better if someone always make an effort to say grace

This demonstrates the power of “family.” If this were just a group of unrelated friends from the past, they would never bother meeting, since they have little in common. But family bonds transcend much. :slight_smile:


All the more reason we as Catholics are called to evangelize. This calling is not limited to reaching out to non-Catholics. There is much work that can be done to call all Catholics back to The Church and to a life of holiness. Be a great example to your family in living the Catholic Christian faith. Consider inviting them to a bible study or to Mass with you if they are not attending Church weekly.


Thanks for sharing your thoughts. It points out the battle we are facing has manifested itself in the realm of sexuality. We are certainly entering a period of interesting times.

Where does your Aunt stand in all this? Maybe she is hoping some of your good example will rub off on them. Make the sign of the Cross and say grace softly to your self if you feel you can’t say it out loud. You can always pray silently for all there to receive the gift of Faith from the Holy Spirit. I bet most families have similar situations. Prayers for all. God Bless, Memaw

I agree with the above - family bonds are very strong…but then as I read it I also thought of these:
46 While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. 48 But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” 49 And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! 50 For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother, and sister, and mother.” (Mt 12)

26 "If any one comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. (Luke 14)
We must always be careful to remain properly focused for our true family are those who do the will of the Father.

Just some thoughts…


Actually sounds just as much like the attendance list at any given Mass.

The Church, this glorious Body of Christ, is a hospital for sinners, after-all.

Pray for them, let go, and let God!

What a sad outlook.

Couldn’t they all be avid outdoorsmen? Be members of the same rotary club and bond over community service projects? Enjoy playing D&D together? Or even just enjoy each other’s company and laugh and talk as friends?

Do you really believe that without family ties that you have nothing in common and wouldn’t bother spending time with divorced people, gays, or noncatholics?


Sounds like your aunt is a very warm and welcoming lady :thumbsup:

I find it curious that you are saying your family is reflecting today’s “secular culture” when what you are describing here is indeed a *Catholic *family.

I had dinner with my very big “secular” family recently, and none in attendance were divorced or cheating on their spouses/girlfriend-boyfriend…and that includes the one same-sex couple.

This, too, reflects “secular” culture.


Sorry for the lack of clarity.

Obviously when people have something in common, they get together regardless of marital status, sexual orientation, or religious practice.

I am involved with figure skating, and also with various music organizations. Based on those clues, how many of you think that I never associate with any homosexuals?! :wink: Or divorced people or non-Catholics?

My point was that family ties alone are enough to bind people together, even when there is disagreement over what constitutes an acceptable morality.

Of course, I agree with JRKH that there will be times when we must reject our blood family in order to follow Jesus. Very hard, and for many people around the world, it’s a heartbreaking daily reality.

Well, there have always been families with at least some of these situations. The only difference is that now things are so much more out in the open than in previous times. So, the guest list in previous generations could have included most of the same people, but the gay person could have been married to a heterosexual “for appearances” while secretly meeting with the other gay person. The boyfriend could still have been a cheat. The live in couple situation could still have existed back then, although it wasn’t as common as it is now. The divorced person could have been divorced back then or could have stayed with the spouse “for appearances” and make up excuses why the other person didn’t attend family functions.
The point is that no family is perfect and even perfect-looking families in the past were not as they appeared.

It’s somewhat predictable that my family members or relatives who are involved in irregular relationships or divorced have distanced themselves from the Church, no longer attending Mass or adhering to its teachings. Nevertheless, it was still a good time spent together.

Good post! You raise an interesting point. It’s very possible that your secular family, or non-believers I assume, are leading standup lives in that they aren’t cheating on their spouses or not in irregular relationships.

I know a few atheists who actually lead lives based on christian morality.

I don’t know, OP. It sounds to me like you’re being pretty judgmental toward the other guests. I mean, you’ve reduced everyone down to a stereotype, of which almost all are based around sexuality. Instead of calling someone the gay partner or live-in girlfriend, you could have said “Josh who likes to cook” or “Jenny who is starting a new career” or anything else really that would show that you took time to get to know them as people. How would you feel if someone posted on a forum, “So, I went to a dinner last night and there was this one strange Catholic guy who seemed to be judging everyone, but ugh I guess that’s just the area he’s from?” (I don’t know anything about where you’re from, but you get the idea.) Why can’t you just be thankful that your aunt invited you to dinner without turning it into some “woe is the modern world” statement?

Et cetera, I think it would be a boring post if I mentioned I had dinner with bill the lawyer, Steve the govt employee etc. After all this is a catholic forum and this post can be said to be a mini census taking a cross section of two catholic families to see how many practice the faith. That’s all it is. I didn’t say that my womanizing brother is hell bound!

The path to Heaven is narrow and difficult, the path the Hell is wide and easy to follow. God Bless, Memaw

Me maw, I agree. Atheists would have a very difficult time walking the " narrow path".

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