Has anyone really found out your vocation?


Has anyone of you prayed to God and asked God to reveal your vocation to you? How did God reveal that to you finally?

I have been discerning for nearly half year for Religious Life (after feeling called by Mary) in last year, however I found no much clue for entering Religious Life, in my mind I still want Marriage much. Because I found a priest, he said our mind is from God, so whatever our mind wants is our Vocation.

Then this year I thought I will have to find a partner, but in the process I feel called to follow God again. However I cannot be confirmed.

God still has not revealed to me my Vocation.

*The First time I feel called in last year - One night after I prayed Rosary and before falling asleep, I heard Mary’s real voice spoke to my ear, saying “You should give up all earthly things.

*The second time I feel called a few weeks ago - I was hurt because of some kinds of relationship and I go to Eucharistic Adoration, when I talked to Jesus about my hurt, I heard in my mind, saying “Come and follow me, I will give you Peace.” That day I felt extremely Peace and Calm and Joy.

** The first time I really heard Mary’s voice, the second time I am not sure if that’s my illusion.

Any suggestion? How do you exactly find out what your vocation is? :o


I read something in this forum years ago that really helped. I think it was called “The 3 A’s”.
Attraction, Ability, Acceptance.

Attraction: You should feel an attraction to the vocation.
Ability: You should have the ability to live fully the vocation (no impediments).
Acceptance: You are accepted into the vocation by the superior by being allowed to profess vows.

Hope this may be of some help.


I hear both the things you heard, and I am married. They are true whether you are called to marriage or to a religious vocation or priesthood.

While you have inclinations within yourself, the inclinations are based on things you encounter outside yourself, things that seem good and do-able for you.

Give up earthly things by giving all you do every day to the Lord, from brushing your teeth to the work at study or your job. Do all for him and tell him, “I am going to do this now for you, since I am your servant, your son.” And whether marriage or religious vocation, do it for him, since your wife will belong to him and is given to your care if marriage, and his people are his and would be given to you for your care if vocation, so do either for him.

How to know? When you meet the woman that seems to be from God, you will either decide she is from him and that you can do it for him and you will make that vow to her and to him, or you will find it is not God’s intention and you cannot. Or, when you encounter the priest or deacon or bishop who asks you to talk to a vocation director, you will discern whether the call is actually for you through them (it is specifically for you), or it is not (it is a generic call they may make but it does not match you specifically and personally).


There is always an aspect of walking by faith and not by sight (2Cor5:7) to any calling in th Christian life. That will sometimes be assisted by the unseen as in your case and sometimes by those God puts around us.


You might be trying to hard. Sometimes God speaks quietly, and while we are listening for hurricane winds, we missed him in gentle breezes.

And, “vocation” does not have to be a call to ordination as bishop, priest, or deacon or religious life. It could be the call to married life And/or it could be a calling to serve in any capacity in the Body of Christ, formally or informally.

With that definition, and without going into detail, I have truly had my vocation to revealed to me by the Holy Spirit, I have willingly accepted it, and I am conducting it to the best of my ability.

And, I am sure you will too!

Peace and all good!


Listen to the inner voice of God that is speaking through your conscience. Sometimes you can’t hear it, because it is overwhelmed by the things you want or because you are to busy with worldly things. It is very normal that man has a desire to marriage but sometimes this comes from nature rather than from God.
It is important to take time for prayer, silence and ask the Lord if He then will whisper in the depths of your heart. You could just say, Speak Lord, for your servant is listening.
In the past I had prayed that if God wanted me to become a sister, he could lead my way to a monastery and he did. Someone invited me shortly after without knowing this and this is how I visited a monastery for the first time.


I often regret not becoming a religious, but I am married now and have to accept it, till death do us part. So no, I’ve never properly discerned my vocation. I wish I had.

Since it’s not too late for you, contact your local diocese and make an appointment with the vocations director. They will give you good advice. I don’t really think “whatever your mind wants…” is accurate, considering how many things our minds want are sinful.

A great website is religiouslife.com

Knights of Columbus has a great vocations pdf at kofc.org-- look under Resources then Vocations.

“A Handbook for Adults Discerning Priesthood and Religious Life” has info about vocations to religious life and the priestly ministry with postcards to mail to the various places (just like college catalogs). It’s the norm that you can go on retreat or spend a few days at any place you’re seriously thinking of entering.

Good luck and may God bless you and guide you in your search to do His will.


I think probably in every vocation, temptations come along re other vocations. Once an actual commitment has been made, temptation it is only and that ‘grass is always greener’ type syndrome. Commitment is commitment and in the case of vocation a commitment/promise/vow made to The Lord. In marriage, it is a commitment to one’s spouse in The Lord’s Presence. Even if temptations come along, the most common disposition experienced are Peace and Joy. The Fruits of The Holy Spirit are:

The twelve Fruits of the Holy Spirit are charity (or love), joy, peace, patience, benignity (or kindness), goodness, longanimity (or long suffering), mildness, faith, modesty, continency, and chastity catholicism.about.com/od/beliefsteachings/f/FAQ_Fruits_HS.htm

The Fruits of The Holy Spirit can come only from Him.

Once I have committed myself, I would not seriously consider a change without sound spiritual direction and over an extended period. Sometimes The Lord can call one to a vocation for a limited period - but only sound spiritual direction over an extended period can identify that this has happened and one is called elsewhere.


Possibly, the one exception might be the call to lay celibacy (single life) which is a call to a vocation that by its very nature does remain open to a further call - personally, I would still be subjecting it to my spiritual director. And ideally the vocation to lay celibacy is not undertaken as one’s actual call and vocation without sound spiritual direction and on an ongoing basis.


I don’t know what kind of disability you have that makes you think that religious life isn’t a possibility for you, but there are all kind of communities. You don’t necessarily need to choose the most radical way,there are also religious people who hold regular jobs in hospitals, schools etc. Then there is the lay communities who have an inner circle of consecrated members who have regular jobs, or work in the missionary field.


That’s good to know.

Can you give examples of these lay communities? Every time I think religious life, I can only think of the cloistered Carmelite nuns.


I’m sorry for the delay. Here are a few names of communities who have consecrated lay members:

  • Apostles of the Interior Life;
  • Focolare;
  • Fraternas;
  • Regnum Christi (controversial).

I know a few consecrated members of Focolare very well and they are lovely. They hold regular jobs or they work in their missions (they have their own hospitals for example).
They are oecemenical so their communities consist of both protestant, catholic and orthodox members.
I know Regnum Christi but not very well. I know that they have many problems and are going through a renewal at the moment.


I forgot to mention Emmanuel community.


Oh really? You also heard both things? How and under what occasions?

And I think Mary asked me to give up earthly things is meaning to give up all including relationships and marriage, and to walk the religious life. Not too sure.


These days I also prayed that if God wants me to enter religious life, just lead me to a monastery. But it seems nothing happened. And no one invited me.

How was the monastery? and how did you feel in those days? how long did you stay there ?


Just be patient and be open to Gods plans. It is almost 10 years ago now that I visited the monastery for the first time. I kept coming back there for many years and loved it there. Eventually I didn’t enter this congregation because it was not exactly what I was looking for but religious life still attracts me and I am planning on visiting other communities soon.
An indication that someone has a vocation to religous life is that the call or the attraction someone feels to the monastic life, keeps coming back on the long term.


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