Have a question


#1

I have to sneak my mass by watching it on the internet does that make me a bad Catholic or does that stop me from being Catholic? The reason I do this is to hide it from my father who is very against the Catholic faith and has told me that Catholics are of the devil and has taken my rosary and Catholic Bible away from me. Thank God that I found a friend who gave me another Catholic Bible which I hide and a rosary which also I hide but keep it on me at all times. So does this make me a bad Catholic or does this not make me a Catholic at all. See I was baptized Catholic as an infant but have never been able to get confirmed because of my father who I currently live with. Please help me understand this issue and what I should do and also if I am Catholic or not? I am afraid to go back up to my dad and tell him again that I am Catholic because he might kick me out and then well I wont have any place to go. Help me please


#2

How old are you?


#3

18 almost 19 but I dont have any money or any place to go until I start college in January


#4

Chic for Christ, while you are living as a “child” under your parents’ care, you need to obey them. This does not make you a bad Catholic. When you turn 18, you can try talking to your father and telling him that you are considered to be an adult in this country and you believe you should be allowed to make your own decisions regarding religion. My mother-in-law was very upset when my husband converted a year before our marriage. And no matter what, we couldn’t get her to understand that the Catholic Church is good. Pray your Rosary every day, with the conversion of you father being one of your intentions. And if you need another Rosary, let me know! Will you be going away to college? If so, try to endure your father’s restrictions until you have more freedom. Do you have any prayers available to you for “Spiritual Communion?” Let me know if you need some.


#5

Yes I will be going away to college. Thank you so much if I have any prayer needs for spiritual communion I will tell you. Well I guess when I get up to the college then I will need a new rosary but not until then because he will take it away from me. I will definitly pray my rosary for his conversion. Thank you so much.


#6

Dear Chic,
Your story made me very sad. I will pray for you. :gopray2:

Your father sounds very controlling and scary.  Under such conditions, you should not try to buck him.  Pray for him and do the best you can while under his thumb.  

Unfortunately, your problems will not end with college, unless you are paying for it or you have a complete scholarship.  If your dad is paying, he can threaten to pull the plug if you displease him.  So continue to be careful at school.  If you really want freeedom to worship, you need to be financially independent.  

If your father had to choose between you being catholic and living under his roof and you cutting ties so that you could be independent and free, which would he choose?  Can you explore this with him without causing a blowup?

Your current life is a form of martyrdom.  It is hard, but also has the possibility of purifying you in your faith.  Keep praying and get as close to Jesus and the Church as you can.  

               In Christ,
               Mulus

#7

[quote=chic for Christ]Yes I will be going away to college. Thank you so much if I have any prayer needs for spiritual communion I will tell you. Well I guess when I get up to the college then I will need a new rosary but not until then because he will take it away from me. I will definitly pray my rosary for his conversion. Thank you so much.
[/quote]

Remember also that we have a “built in” rosary.

When I do not have a rosary with me, I use my fingers. They cannot be taken away from you, as they are a part of you.

I will keep you in my prayers.

MC


#8

[quote=aimekuelmc]Remember also that we have a “built in” rosary.

When I do not have a rosary with me, I use my fingers. They cannot be taken away from you, as they are a part of you.

I will keep you in my prayers.

MC
[/quote]

I was just going to suggest that.

Let’s look at it this way: It is November 28th. January is right around the corner.

You might want to talk to the campus priest, or find another in a good parish when you get to school. There may be other options for you that you haven’t considered, scholarships, grants and student jobs of which you are not aware that could lead to financial independence from your father, should he decide to stop financing you.

And as you are over 18, college is an excellent place to be confirmed, esp. under your conditions. I would not broadcast it if your dad is paying the bills, though. I suppose that sounds sneaky, but Confirmation provides a lot of grace to handle these circumstances.

You don’t say anything about your mother. Is she available to help you?

You are in my prayers. Please pray for my special intentions. Your suffering has merit.

PS: You are most certainly Catholic.


#9

Well right now my mom is going through some financial problems so no she isnt available. When she gets on her feet then yeah she will be more than willing to take me in. See she might be losing her house and well yeah thats not good. I will most definitly look into a job at the college and will be more than likely finding a person I can attend Mass with at the college. My father is very controlling and would definitly pull the plug and would never talk to me again if I told him that I was Catholic. In fact he would leave me hungry and without any clothes on the streets if he found out that I was Catholic. He has basically told me that I would not get anywhere being Catholic so now I have gone three years without bringinig it up so that these things dont come about.


#10

Well, get through Christmas and New Years, and head to college with the thought of giving yourself a break from the stress, getting adjusted to classes, etc. Then, after a couple weeks, find a good priest and the financial aid office.

BTW- Dad is not sending you to a church school like Biola or Wheaton, is he? Don’t say where you’re going- too much info.


#11

Are you going to be attending ASU in January? If so, go to the Newman Center on campus there (corner of College & University) and ask to speak to Father Nathan or Father Fred or Sister Colleen. They will be of so much help and support to you in every way.
That Newman Center is packed with active Catholic students and you will feel very much at home.
Hang in there! It will be January soon!
And in answer to your question, if you are Catholic in your heart, you are Catholic.


#12

Bear in mind that many great Saints had to endure what you are enduring. St. Barbara comes to mind. When her father returned from a trip and found out she was a Christian, he took her out and
killed her. She remained a good and faithful daughter to the end.
Remember to pray for his conversion. God will Bless you abundantly for this. You inspire me. Thank you, and ask St. Barbara to help you. :wink:


#13

[quote=catsrus]Are you going to be attending ASU in January? If so, go to the Newman Center on campus there (corner of College & University) and ask to speak to Father Nathan or Father Fred or Sister Colleen. They will be of so much help and support to you in every way.
That Newman Center is packed with active Catholic students and you will feel very much at home.
Hang in there! It will be January soon!
And in answer to your question, if you are Catholic in your heart, you are Catholic.
[/quote]

If you are going to ASU, you might as well be going to a Catholic college. So smile…things will be looking up in 49 days or so!

public.asu.edu/~nathanc/


#14

You have ten fingers- use that has your rosary! I do it all the time if I don’t have one on me, or I’m driving or something :slight_smile:


#15

NO he is sending me away to Graceland University and I will be looking for the Catholic program there but I will be most definitly looking into ASU. Thank you for the suggestion. I will be praying to St. Barbara and will be also praying for his conversion. Well thank you for your suggestions and thank you for your prayers.


#16

[quote=CatholicSam] Do you have any prayers available to you for “Spiritual Communion?” Let me know if you need some.
[/quote]

No I dont have any prayers available to me for "Spiritual Communion. I would greatly appreciate it if you got me some. Thank you very much


#17

[quote=chic for Christ]No I dont have any prayers available to me for "Spiritual Communion. I would greatly appreciate it if you got me some. Thank you very much
[/quote]

And from now on, whenever I am receiving the Eucharist, you are going to be in my prayers. You are amazing…and you bet you are a Catholic.

BTW - your father is going to be in my prayers too.


#18

[quote=LSK]And from now on, whenever I am receiving the Eucharist, you are going to be in my prayers. You are amazing…and you bet you are a Catholic.

BTW - your father is going to be in my prayers too.
[/quote]

Thank you he needs all the prayers he can get he is becoming worse and worse in fact now CPS has been called on him and well he is letting his fiancee and her daughter get involved and now they are hurting my sister. I dont know what to do any more. I know all of this has come about me being Catholic and everything because it wasnt this bad when I wasnt around and well they see how much my sister means to me. So please keep them in your prayers also.


#19

[quote=chic for Christ]Thank you he needs all the prayers he can get he is becoming worse and worse in fact now CPS has been called on him and well he is letting his fiancee and her daughter get involved and now they are hurting my sister. I dont know what to do any more. I know all of this has come about me being Catholic and everything because it wasnt this bad when I wasnt around and well they see how much my sister means to me. So please keep them in your prayers also.
[/quote]

I don’t know if this will help you or not…in the early Church we were horribly persecuted for loving Jesus, being Catholic and remaining true to the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church. We were stoned, beaten, dragged through the streets, thrown into pits and eaten by wild beasts as part of an afternoon of entertainment. Those brave men and women are still with us today. They are part of the Church Triumphant, just as we are, on earth, a part of the Church Militant. If you, in your daily prayers, ask the martyrs of the Church, to pray for you and with you, to give you and your sister strength they will do so. If you ask St. Michael the Archangel to protect you, he will. Offer your suffering up for the souls in Purgatory. I cannot pretend to know why you are going through what you are going through right now, but I do know that God permits evil because from all evil comes GREAT GOOD. Hang in there, little sister. There are great things coming for you and your sister.


#20

I have tears in my eyes reading these posts. I cannot imagine having to be so strong, so young. God must have great things planned for you if he is letting you confront such hardships at your age. I know that many saints have had great trials at young ages too. I will ask them to intercede on your behalf.

If it helps, you might find consolation in the fact that many, many Christians through the years have had to suffer hiding their faith. Underground churches have existed since the beginning and still exist today in places where there is religious persecution. Just look at how many of the New Testament epistles were written from prison. Stay strong. Offer these hard times up for the conversion of your family and ask for the gift of fortitude. I know that God will be with you wherever you are. And as long as you believe, have faith, and the desire to practice your religion in all it’s fullness, you are completely Catholic.

It sounds as if your family is in tremendous crisis. I pray that you will all get through this in one piece.


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