Have I been given the gift of celibacy/virginity?

How do I know if I have been given the gift of celibacy/virginity for the sake of the kingdom? Are there any good signs that would tell me if I’ve been given this gift or not?

That depends. If you’re living celibate and as a virgin now, do you see it as a gift or as a burden? If the former, you have received that gift, for this time at least. If you are male, please consider the clerical life. If the latter, then you’d do well to consider marriage. Keep all of these things in prayer.

God bless.

There are some people who consider themselves to be asexual…meaning that they have no sexual attraction to anyone. If you think that describes you then perhaps you do have the gift of celibacy!


discuss this with a spiritual director or priest for discernment.

Thanks for the answers so far!

Now I’m wondering, with reference to discerning one’s vocation, does being capable of celibacy mean I have the gift even if I would prefer marriage? Or does having the desire for marriage mean I don’t have the “gift” to be celibate, even if I imagine I could technically live celibately.

And I definitely do need to discuss this with my spiritual director. :slight_smile:

But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

1 Corinthians 7:9

I’m flummoxed as to why you’d advise a male who is celibate and sees it as a gift to consider the clerical life, but advise the female who is living celibate and sees it as a gift to consider marriage?

That makes no sense.

To the OP…I’d consider everything you’ve been given a “gift”.
Whether you stay celibate or get married or become a rocket scientist or become a mother. It’s all a gift.
So the answer to your question is: YES.


Yes I have to admit that I didn’t get that either. lol :confused:

Haha, I read that too at first. But I think the sentence was out-of-place. The latter option refers to celibacy as feeling like a burden, thus marriage.

What on earth made you come up with that idea ?

No he meant by saying “if the latter” in reference to if they find celibacy a burden then choose marriage. He never mentioned being female.
You read his response wrong.

“If you’re living celibate and as a virgin now, do you see it as a gift or as a burden? If the former,… If the latter…”

Perhaps not the best of moves on my part to put another unrelated conditional sentence between the two in that dyad. I hope the above clarifies my intended structure.

It is there for all of those who are strong enough to embrace it, if you don’t think you are strong enough to do what is spiritually best for yourself then by all means get married lest you burn in Hell. See 1 Corinthians 7

(I’m not saying marriage is bad, rather I am saying that it is inferior to celibacy.)

No, that is not the case at all. Celibacy/virginity does not equal asexual. Both are to be a sacrifice of love in dedicating oneself wholly and complete to God. This is not something asexual people can do.


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