This is my first post but I need to talk to someone about this so much.
I was baptised in a Church of England (Protestant) church as a baby, and attended Church very occassionally as a child (Christmastime mainly). From the age of 11/12 (I’m now 19), God suddenly became more and more important in my life, I started praying, reading the Bible, researching more about Christianity. Its this faith in God that helped me overcome a 3 year bout of depression. I want to tell you this to explain how important God is in my life before I go on to the next part.
Whilst working as a nanny in France, I was invited to go to the (Catholic) Church with the family whom I worked for. I attended the mass, and was then invited to take Communion. I did this twice (once in the September, once at the Easter service). At both of these times, I was COMPLETLEY unaware of the magnitude of what I was doing… I was confused about my religion, didn’t completely understand the different branches of Christianity. I knew that I believed in God, that I was a Christian but I was (and still am) at the start of getting to know God (my family are atheists, very alone in all this). Since later on researching how important the Catholic Communion is and how I have sinned by taking this Communion I am so ashamed and scared, the guilt is almost overpowering. I can’t stop thinking about it, I have prayed and prayed for forgiveness over it. All I can say is it was complete and utter ignorance on my part, and at the time I just wanted to worship God and believed that was what an (adult) Christian should do when worshipping…
Please advise me on what I should do… can I rectify what I’ve done?