I have three inlaws in my life, a MIL and 2 SILs.
I am aware that they like to talk about me behind my back. Honestly, I don’t know why they do it but they do it to any woman who is not in their circle. I seem to be one one the main targets of their derogitory gossip.
I have kept a polite relationship with my MIL for my husband’s sake and because I feel obligated to do so but I keep a distance and would not consider her a friend.
The SILs are a whole other story, I don’t feel an obligation to keep up a personal relationship with either of them but have always sent cards and have had them over for occasions. I have also attended their family functions at well.
This has been very difficult for me particularly because the SIL who lives in another state, has escalated her attacks to the point of slamming a car door on me, addressing Christmas cards only to my husband, starting a conversation about my son where she insinuated that he might be gay, filling a plate at a family buffet and then pushing it on me on two occasions (because my MIL told her that I hadn’t had enough to eat at one of her parties party) I could name countless more but the point is I’m trying not to count.
Anyway, I’ve gotten to the point where, unless it is a very large occasion, I am not willing to socialize when the three are together and I am not willing to socialize with myone SIL at all.
I do not wish harm or revenge in any way and I do pray for them, especially for my one SIL because I think she may be mentally ill. But I can no longer deal with getting together with them and in particular my one SIL. I try very hard to not even feel ill will towards them for the things they say about their support of abortion,homosexuallity,feminisim and divorce. I ignore the jabs at my Faith. I try not to take offense when they say how ignorant it is for any one to not think that abortion is a woman’s right. The SILs are professionals,one is in medicine, the other in teaching(I’m pointing out that they are highly educated people that why I can’t dismiss what they say as shear ignorance) They are both very opinionated and unwilling to listen to a religious point of view let alone a Catholic point of view.
I have come to the point that other than sending cards I can’t be in my one SILs company anymore. Am I being unforgiving?
Is there anything more I can do to forgive?