Havent been to confession in over 6 years


#1

i go to mass every sunday and sometimes saturday but i havent been to reconciliation in over 6 years. i Dont even understand the point of it? cant we just let jesus forgive us our sins, isnt this just as good. can anyone post an apologetic or a link to defend confession. thanks


#2

Confession is a wonderful sacrament. Here are some resources from the CA library, they might help you in your understanding of it :thumbsup: :

The Forgiveness of Sins

Confession (Church Fathers)


#3

[quote=melbourne_guy]i go to mass every sunday and sometimes saturday but i havent been to reconciliation in over 6 years.

[/quote]

I am sorry to hear that. It is a requirement of the Church that we confess our grave sins at least once a year, just as we are required to go to Mass on Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation, to be in good standing with the Church. Also, we may not receive Holy Communion without having been absolved of our grave sins first.

Perhaps you were not taught thoroughly?

The point is to avail yourself of the means Christ provided to be loosened from your sins and reconciled to the Body of Christ that was hurt by your sins. Why else would Christ give this power to His Apostles, except that it was necessary for us to go to them? Who else would represent the Body of Christ by which we may be reconciled? For our sins are done by means of our neighbor.

An analogy would be taking a shower. How long could you go without taking a shower? And would you take a shower with your clothes on? By going to confession and exposing your soul, you avail yourself of cleansing grace and overcome the sin of pride and disobedience, and are strengthened in confidence in your future battles with sin.

[quote=melbourne_guy]cant we just let jesus forgive us our sins, isnt this just as good. can anyone post an apologetic or a link to defend confession. thanks
[/quote]

We certainly must start by being sorry and seeking forgiveness. But as Catholics, we must link that with the intention of confessing to a priest as soon as we reasonably can. We must obtain absolution in the Sacrament.

As soon as a man falls into sin, charity, faith, and mercy do not deliver him from sin, without Penance. Because charity demands that a man should grieve for the offense committed against his friend, and that he should be anxious to make satisfaction to his friend; faith requires that he should seek to be justified from his sins through the power of Christ’s Passion which operates in the sacraments of the Church
newadvent.org/summa/408405.htm

A more general link is catholicprimer.org/summa/TP/TP084.html#TPQ84OUTP1

Hope this helps.

hurst


#4

[quote=melbourne_guy]i go to mass every sunday and sometimes saturday but i havent been to reconciliation in over 6 years. i Dont even understand the point of it? cant we just let jesus forgive us our sins, isnt this just as good. can anyone post an apologetic or a link to defend confession. thanks
[/quote]

the point of it is that you haven’t been to confession in 6 years. that says something about humility, admission of one’s own sinfulness, and most of all admission that one’s sin is not a personal affair between Jesus and the individual, but is an act against the entire church and all humanity, even the smallest most private sin. If we do not acknowledge the dimension of reconciliation with the community, we miss the point of Christ’s teaching on forgiveness. He was talking about something that is between you and your brother.

As I never weary of saying, when you ask a very basic question like these, please do your homework on the CA homepage first, read the relevant articles, then come here with specific questions. The citations you ask for are already there for you.


#5

Confession is a sacrament, therefore we receive graces. The Church requires that we go once a year, but suggests we go more often than that.


#6

Why not go before Christmas Day and see if Christ reveals the point to you? You might end up having a Christmas like no other.


#7

[quote=puzzleannie]As I never weary of saying, when you ask a very basic question like these, please do your homework on the CA homepage first, read the relevant articles, then come here with specific questions. The citations you ask for are already there for you.
[/quote]

I’m glad *you * never weary of it, PuzzleA --I feel like a broken record sometimes! :rolleyes:

Very often the answers someone is asking for are just two clicks away!


#8

[quote=melbourne_guy]i go to mass every sunday and sometimes saturday but i havent been to reconciliation in over 6 years. i Dont even understand the point of it? cant we just let jesus forgive us our sins, isnt this just as good. can anyone post an apologetic or a link to defend confession. thanks
[/quote]

Christ does forgive our sins, when we show repentance, and we show this by going to confession. Have you ever thought of how much humility you need to confess your gravest sins to Gods appointed ministers on earth?

Plus, it will help keep you on the straight and narrow, because you will start to realized your Sins much more if you go to confession more often. I use to go once a year, at Christmas, now I go regularly, and everytime I fall into Sin, I regret it that much more and I am more more conscious about how I live my life.

Hope this helps.


#9

Many times we get so caught up in the rules and rubrics it’s easy to lose sight of our true loving God. All the comments made here are very accurate and true - and in my mind, becoming the truest, strongest member of the Body of Christ is living to the teachings of Jesus Christ, Scripture, and the Magisterium of the Catholic Church.

However, I recognize that not everyone believes that, unfortunately. So I offer this – assuming that you are someone that truly loves Jesus Christ and wants a strong relationship with Him, realize that all of our concepts of family, love, and intimacy came for God! The human race learned it from Him. So many times, you can think about your own experiences and beliefs of love and family, and believe in your heart that God wants you to treat Him the same way.

So imagine a spouse, or family member, that continues to disappoint you (analogous to sin with God), who never “reconciles” (confesses) with you that they hurt you or your feelings, they are sorry, and they will try not to do it again. It’s like the bad movie where the husband keeps saying “Don’t worry honey, I love you”, yet goes on living a debauchery life.

Is that a good relationship/ Would you really believe that person loves you?

So we need to talk to our loved ones when we hurt them, to say we are sorry. How does the Bible say we should do that? Red Matthew 16:19 -" I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.”

Since we cannot talk directly to God in the flesh, we confess to the Body of Christ - our priests. It is not up to you to rationalize the best way to do it, if you love God, you will do it the way He asks you to.

There are many benefits to Reconciliation as a sacrament , but I wanted to share with you that it’s likely your own beliefs about love and family should be applied to God as well if you love Him.%between% %between%


#10

Confession is a wonderful sacrament. I try to go as often as possible, it makes me feel so much better. The question of why we can’t just ask Jesus to fogive us is common. But if jesus had wanted us to ask him directly, why would he have established confession?


#11

[quote=melbourne_guy]i go to mass every sunday and sometimes saturday but i havent been to reconciliation in over 6 years. i Dont even understand the point of it? cant we just let jesus forgive us our sins, isnt this just as good. can anyone post an apologetic or a link to defend confession. thanks
[/quote]

If there is no point to it, it should be no sweat going to it and confessing your sins, espcially if you think your sins are already forgiven.


#12

[quote=jman507]If there is no point to it, it should be no sweat going to it and confessing your sins, espcially if you think your sins are already forgiven.
[/quote]

I guess I don’t understand the logic here: “go even if don’t think you need it?”

If I understand my sins to be forgiven through Confession, then why would I go again if I understand those sins to be forgiven?

We should go when we have something to confess. At least that’s what I’ve always understood.

Blessings,
Richard


#13

[quote=Richard_Hurtz]I guess I don’t understand the logic here: “go even if don’t think you need it?”

If I understand my sins to be forgiven through Confession, then why would I go again if I understand those sins to be forgiven?

We should go when we have something to confess. At least that’s what I’ve always understood.

Blessings,
Richard
[/quote]

We never don’t need it! Even the just man falls seven times a day - and that is not a numeric seven, it means many, many times.

Yes, we should go to confession when we have something to confess - but not necessarily mortal sins. We commit so many venial sins, the only way we can start overcoming these is to confess them regularly, and try to become more aware of our sinfullness.

It’s a bit like thinking that we don’t need a shower because we are not covered in filth! If we wait to shower until we are like vagrants, a shower would not do the job - we would have to soak in a warm bath and probably have to have two or more baths to get clean. If we shower daily, we are never very dirty, but feel refreshed after we shower.

If we only commit venial sins and do not go to confession regularly, we will become more and more grubby - and used to that state, so we will stop seeing how many sins we have really committed.


#14

Thanks to everyone that posted, very helpful. ill go to confession but the thing im scared of most is exactly what some of you discussed, humiliation. my face will turn extremely red when i adress issues like pornography and masturbation and i dont think i can handle that. i dont really mind confessing about being selfish and sometimes taking my family for granted but when it comes to private issues i dont know how to confess it.


#15

[quote=melbourne_guy]Thanks to everyone that posted, very helpful. ill go to confession but the thing im scared of most is exactly what some of you discussed, humiliation. my face will turn extremely red when i adress issues like pornography and masturbation and i dont think i can handle that. i dont really mind confessing about being selfish and sometimes taking my family for granted but when it comes to private issues i dont know how to confess it.
[/quote]

Don’t worry about it. I know it can be frustrating, but you need to go. I hadn’t gone to confession for abour 6 years either myself, and went for the first time 8 months ago. It was great to get all that off my chest. Also, the priest has heard much worse things than that. Mine goes regularly to the local county jail to hear confessions (we’re in a county seat town). Confession starts with realizing what you did, and asking Christ for forgiveness. A priest acts in persona Christi.

Please see:
scripturecatholic.com/confession.html
scripturecatholic.com/primacy_of_peter.html
scripturecatholic.com/apostolic_succession.html

God bless,


#16

This analogy is unsatisfactory. If I were to employ this mode of thinking I would have to confess a mortal sin multiple times in order to receive forgiveness. I understand a confession made with true contriteness of heart is what is required - not multiple confessions.

Furthermore, your line of reasoning

We never don’t need it.

implies that as soon as confession has been made we immediately need to confess again.

Peace


#17

[quote=melbourne_guy] but the thing im scared of most is exactly what some of you discussed, humiliation. my face will turn extremely red when i adress issues like pornography and masturbation and i dont think i can handle that.
[/quote]

You just answered why it is important that you confess your sins to a priest.

  1. it is harder to do this, than what you say in private.

I am a new Catholic and I was taught you want to pray alone first in Church, and ask Jesus to give us strength to confess outloud what we have confessed in private.


#18

[quote=melbourne_guy]Thanks to everyone that posted, very helpful. ill go to confession but the thing im scared of most is exactly what some of you discussed, humiliation. my face will turn extremely red when i adress issues like pornography and masturbation and i dont think i can handle that. i dont really mind confessing about being selfish and sometimes taking my family for granted but when it comes to private issues i dont know how to confess it.
[/quote]

I’ve confessed those exact things, and more, lol, but it was very difficult, and being truly repentant, sometimes people get emotional even in the confessional, as has happened to me. One thing to remember, no sin is unforgivable, no sin is unique, and the Priests have heard them all before, so nothing will shock them. In fact, I find, I get some really good advice on how to avoid the Sin in the future.

By the way, it is the best feeling in the world leaving confession, and experiencing the grace of Jesus’ mercy first hand.


#19

[quote=Richard_Hurtz]This analogy is unsatisfactory. If I were to employ this mode of thinking I would have to confess a mortal sin multiple times in order to receive forgiveness. I understand a confession made with true contriteness of heart is what is required - not multiple confessions.

Furthermore, your line of reasoning

implies that as soon as confession has been made we immediately need to confess again.

Peace
[/quote]

Hi Richard -

I think you’re misunderstanding the basic points that Joan is trying to convey. The Sacrament of Reconciliation is a tool to help us preservere in living a life towards holiness. Whether or not a person commits a multitiude of mortal sins or not doesn’t not negate the amount of forgiveness we recieve. All sins are forgiven. The benefits of receiving the sacrament frequently are that we are given the graces, and those graces are sustained, in pursuing a life that is decreasing in sin bit by bit. Sure, after a confession, one might be prone to scrupulousity, and see the need to confess immediately, but one has to maintain a balance with how human nature acts and what God expects from us. In otherwords, we have to be more forgiving of ourselves in order not to fall into that bind of scrupulousity.

That being said, you are right in stating that the sacrament should be made with full contriteness of heart. It is the Lord’s desire that we examine our concience, find moments in our life that we have disregarded the Word of God, no matter how big or how small, realize how this may have been displeasing to Him, and go and receive the graces that the washing of our sins gives us in the sacrament. Preserverence is the key to all of this, and frequent receiving of the Sacrament of Reconciliation helps us do that.

God Bless!


#20

[quote=melbourne_guy]Thanks to everyone that posted, very helpful. ill go to confession but the thing im scared of most is exactly what some of you discussed, humiliation. my face will turn extremely red when i adress issues like pornography and masturbation and i dont think i can handle that. i dont really mind confessing about being selfish and sometimes taking my family for granted but when it comes to private issues i dont know how to confess it.
[/quote]

The priest doesn’t have to see your face turn red if you use a more “traditional” confessional with a screen. :thumbsup:
It’s not less humbling, though.

There is a very fine distinction between being humiliated and being humbled. My personal view is that the difference involves accepting the grace from God to be, well, graceful about it or not. It seems very similar to the notion of being shameless versus being without shame.

The humbled say without shame, “I have sinned, but I know that God has forgiven me in His infinite mercy. I may inevitably fall again, but with God’s help I will do my best not to. If I do fall again into sin, I will flee back to His infinite mercy.”

The humiliated say, “I have sinned, and although I know God has forgiven me in His infinite mercy, I cannot forgive myself and put it behind me. I am not strong enough to avoid sin on my own, and I am unable to put trust in God’s grace to help me.”

The shameless add, “If I fall into sin again, it’s because of concupiscence, and God will forgive me anyway.”

Turning humiliation into humility is hard, but it gets easier with frequent confession!


DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.