so I suppose you know which kids you wish you nevere had so that you can retire?
Now hang on...Airplane Nut is clearly troubled by what's going on in his/her life. While I agree saying that many Catholics are drinking the large family kool-aid is very uncharitable...so is asking him/her (oh forget this I'll just stick with "he" like in Spanish where gender is unknown) which of his children does he wish was never born.
Although his post is bitter, he never did say he regretted having *any **of them (in fact he said he was *blessed!)...only that he wished he thought more about the responsibility beforehand. It sounds like the same thing but it really isn't. You can have things turn out wonderfully and still wish you thought more about your future. He's still probably doing the best he can. It's tough. Just because children are a blessing doesn't mean we should require financially strapped parents of many children to have their happy faces on all the time.
It's one thing to ask a busybody which one of your own kids would **they **get rid off to make a point. But not asking the busybody this question about **their **kids. If I got asked that because I didn't have my happy face on, I'd feel an urge to smack you for equating my real anxiety over money troubles with a desire to be rid of some or all of my children.
I'm the oldest of 5. Once we were all in school both my parents worked. We bought our needs in bulk. A wholesale club was our friend. Most of the time, generic is just as good as brand name. Shop smart. Amazon Mom and BJ's are my best friends. After you take care of those 1-time items like a crib I'm actually shocked at how little we are spending on our firstborn (even more so since she's formula fed with disposable diapers...but that could easily have turned out otherwise if she was born with health concerns). She's already outgrown her newborn clothes but they're still in great shape and ready for the next one (if there is a next one). Of God wills it and our next one is another girl dang we'll be set for years...or at least until she starts caring about the fact she never gets anything "new". :p
As far as college went my parents started early and invested in the stock market as soon as we were born. I'm not sure if they set up 529s for us...I could have sworn they had more freedom to do as they wished with the money. But most of us were able to get scholarships to cover more than half of the expense. We also ended up not going to school out of state and we didn't live on campus (the one sibling who tried *hated *the experience...in fact she hated college life in general so much she graduated in 3 years just to get out).
And yes the cost per child does go down as you have more of them since there are quite a few essentials that you only need to buy once.
But this is my personal experience. I don't really believe in "one size fits all" parenting. So you do everything you can to make things work and let God take care of the rest.