Help! lots of questions

I was Baptized Catholic. As an adult I unfortuanately decided to marry outside of the Church to a non Catholic. We have been divorced for 5 years(after 3 children). 3 years ago I met and married another non Catholic (yes I kno):banghead: :banghead: . Anyway since then I have returned to my Faith. I met with my Priest immediately , told him everything, and asked to have our Marriage validated.
Okay so here are the issues and questions I hav;

  1. Is our civil Marriage valid?

2.Will I need an annulment in order to be married in the Church with My husband(who is also divorced )?

  1. My Priest said as long as I am meeting with hm to prepare for our Marriage I can receive Sacraments, which I hve been doing for over a year.
    Suddenly it has occured to me that this is not Ok.
    We have not gotten any closer to our Marriage being validated.
    I am divorced, and remarried.

What am to do???

Follow the advice of your priest and the tribunal but you should separate for the duration and no longer live in the same household. At least, live “as brother and sister.”

Welcome to CAF! I’ll pray for you :slight_smile:

I don’t know that living apart is possible we have a child , and he adopted the other three. I stay at home and shomeschool.

Anyway Clarification, I can receive Sacraments as long as we live as “brother and sister”? becasue I am asuming I am still married? or not yet married both were civil marriages…

Also there have been no official steps taken in the process and it has been well over a year in fact almost 2. I meet with my Priest on a weekly sometimes several tmes a week basis. when i ask he says this is the process…

You need to show your previous docs re marriage and legal divorce and then do paperwork for a degree of nullity-VERY SIMPLE PROCESS.

Was your husband baptized before his first marriage & was he married to an unbaptized person?

If he was baptized, married to a baptized person, then he will have to show docs re marriage and legal divorce AND show cause for an annulment.

You are not married, according to Church laws-so yes, you will
have to refrain from the marital embrace and all sexual activity
in order to receive Holy Communion.

These questions should have already been asked and answered by you and your husband almost two years ago-

Call your Parish secretary and find out where your case is in the process-seems like someone has dropped the ball - explain your situation and ask for help ASAP.

Might be prudent to find a different confessor.
Pray for your Parish 's Priest.

Good luck and May God Bless you and your husband and your
family.

  1. Is our civil Marriage valid?

You seem to know the answer to this one since you have asked to have it convalidated.

2.Will I need an annulment in order to be married in the Church with My husband(who is also divorced )?

Yes, as well as he will need to have your first attempts at Marriage looked into.

  1. My Priest said as long as I am meeting with hm to prepare for our Marriage I can receive Sacraments, which I hve been doing for over a year.
    Suddenly it has occured to me that this is not Ok.

IT’s not OK Unless you are living as brother and sister after going to Confession.

We have not gotten any closer to our Marriage being validated.
I am divorced, and remarried.

What am to do???

Stay on your priest and make sure your Annulment and your “husbands” Annulment are moving along.

Has he asked for and been given the documents needed to start the process? Your Baptism/Sacramental record from your Baptismal parish, your first Marriage license, your first Civil divorce decree? All Duplicated for your “husband”.

Another “glich”,my husband says he was brought up Catholic, I asked him last night if he knew where he was baptized he said he doesn’t think he ever was. He never attended Mass growing up either.His Parents are estranged, I don’t know how to get this needed information.
Something I failed to mention, I have not yet been confirmed, which apparently needs to happen first. So these Meetings are preparing me for confession, I just feel that if the annulment proceedure takes so long, couldn’t we start it as we are working towards the other.
We haven’t been given any instructions or paperwork.

I had a Priest tell me in he past my husband would have to convert. This one says that is not so.

Why do things change from Priest to Priest?

If a cvil marriage in not valid in the eyes of God or Church why does it have to be annulled?

I do go to confession every week, as do my children, also daily and Sunday Mass.

We have been living as brother and sister and will continue, though I do see this as being a difficult task if this goes on another 2 years or even 1.

I appreciate the help.

It is actually valid if for non-Catholics. The Church accounts a civil marriage, unless contracted by a baptized Catholic who has therefore taken on the obligation to be married in the Church, as a perfectly valid marriage.

I’m sure that many more knowledgeable people have posted and will post in response to your questions. However, if a baptized Catholic marries, it must be in a Catholic Church with a priest as witness. If this does not happen, e.g. one marries a non Catholic by a JP or a mayor, it is not valid due to a defect in form. You may not need an annulment. Your first marriage can be declared invalid due to Defect in Form as declared by the Tribunal of your diocese. Your marriage will still have to go before the Tribunal but the process is not as complicated as a Declaration of Nullity. Call your Tribunal office if your priest has dropped the ball.

Peace,
Linda

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