Help me please.

Well, to start off, I’m Agnostic but I want to believe in God.

I’ve tried hard to believe that there is a God but every time I try and pray, I get this powerful feeling that I’m being an idiot and what I’m doing has really no point.

Now, naturally, most would say “Can you please prove to me that there is a God” yet I know that defeats the purpose of faith. What’s worse, is my family used to be heavily mormon and I’ve reviewed it all in my head with the conclusion of rubbish but I have this feeling I may be making a huge mistake labeling it as such.

,__, I’m lost in this pool of I don’t know what’s true - The logical bit of me seems right but intution says it’s not. My catholic girlfriend has been trying to help me but I don’t know what to do. If I were to die tomorrow, I don’t want to be damned but if I were to die 80 years from now, I don’t want to have been living a lie.

Can someone help me? How can I find God? I’ve tried reading the bible, I’ve tried praying (and as far as I know my prayers go seemingly unanswered), and I’ve even been to Catholic church. I can’t, however, seem to grasp a logical answer that my brain wont fight itself with about that ultimate topic that many people struggle with all the time. ‘God and his existence.’

My girlfriend tried to explain it to me earlier but I ended up crying ;_;

How do I go from Agnostic to Catholic?
Help please :frowning:

Your feeling is accurate, praying is mostly pointless. It can help you relax though, similar to meditation.

Now, naturally, most would say “Can you please prove to me that there is a God” yet I know that defeats the purpose of faith. What’s worse, is my family used to be heavily mormon and I’ve reviewed it all in my head with the conclusion of rubbish but I have this feeling I may be making a huge mistake labeling it as such.

,__, I’m lost in this pool of I don’t know what’s true - The logical bit of me seems right but intution says it’s not. My catholic girlfriend has been trying to help me but I don’t know what to do. If I were to die tomorrow, I don’t want to be damned but if I were to die 80 years from now, I don’t want to have been living a lie.

The most rational course of action is to accept a claim only to the extent of the evidence supporting that claim. For example, if I said “I have he ability to fly like superman”, you should not believe me until I demonstrate that I can.

Can someone help me? How can I find God? I’ve tried reading the bible, I’ve tried praying (and as far as I know my prayers go seemingly unanswered), and I’ve even been to Catholic church. I can’t, however, seem to grasp a logical answer that my brain wont fight itself with about that ultimate topic that many people struggle with all the time. ‘God and his existence.’

Your brain is rejecting the existence of god(s) because it is illogical. It is like believing in fairies/unicorns/vishnu/shiva/brahma. There is no evidence that these things exist.

Also, why are you considering the christian/catholic god, and not the hindu gods, or the muslim god, or the mormon god?

Do you agree that it is possible that these other religions might be true? If so, why are you not looking into these religions?

When you try to believe and try to pray and then you get the negative feelings that is Satan coming to disturb you. Once you make the decision for Jesus, for the Catholic Church, for God; however you want to say it; you should never let your feelings sway you.
Say Jesus I Trust in You over & over and whenever you get the bad feelings.
I really felt that you wanted and needed help and that you are open to Truth so I’m going to say something that could disturb you or hurt you. You come from a mormon background and although mormans are good people it is a false belief and you may have to do some work to purge that so Jesus can work in you.
Keep going to mass and know that Jesus is really there in the Eucharist; the real presence. Ask Him to bless you and to come into your heart and then accept that He is really in there. Don’t let Satan fool around with your feelings and decieve you.
I myself prayed for Jesus to reveal Himself to me and then I went into my local Catholic Church and I kept saying Jesus just let me know if you are in here. Oh my! Three people hugged me, Confession was made available, I was given a rosary, on & on. He showed me and I came back to my faith.
I’m going to be praying for you and I’m sure others will answer and help you too.
Love in Christ Jesus,
Agatina

Try keeping it simple at first. Just sit in the church, don’t try to concentrate or pray to hard, just sit.

Try reading simplified versions of the Bible stories (not to imply your not intelligent enough to understand the original versions :p) I am 19 and still love nothing better than to curl up with my childrens Bible I got when I was eight.

I know it sounds counter intuitive, but don’t try to hard. Faith can be difficult, but if you are trying to grow in faith sometimes it is best to take small steps.

Creation(the universe)testafies to our Wonderful Creater.Humanity,testafies to the need for a Saviour.Jesus is the answer to both questions.I will keep you in prayer.Peace,Rocky.

Keep it simple, for me God reveals answers a little at a time. Very gently and slowly. When I look at the sky and I see the rays coming through the clouds I think of God. When I look at the birds I think of what Jesus said about the sparrows, how He even cares for them. When I see three birds, I think of the Holy Trinity. When I go to walk on the docks and look at the ocean and the sky…you can’t but help to think of God. It’s kind of ironic, but I did notice the first answer you received to your question and it is the typical way that the enemy works…he is first to respond to discourage you. He works on your fears. If you keep your heart open, keep praying, trusting in God all will fall into place. You’ve just begun your journey. St Padre Pio had a saying: Pray, Hope & don’t Worry. When things get hard for me as far as my faith goes, I try to stop and be grateful and I also try to surrender my will to God’s and accept all as coming from Jesus as he accepted all as coming from the Father. Also, learn to pray the Rosary or say a few Hail Mary’s…more often than not when I go to His mother all my confusion is taken away and I become at peace.

You pray for faith; faith is not something that we develop on our own. Like has been said, the doubt is a product of Satan, of evil. Satan doesn’t hit us over the head with a hammer, he uses subtlety. Whispering little questions in our subconscious like, “Come now, God really doesn’t exist, does he?” can be more effective than, for example, natural disasters where one might question “How can God let this this kind of thing happen?”

Take baby steps. Think about “Intelligent design”. Keep reading your bible. Keep praying. Go to mass with your GF and just listen.

Consider Paschal’s wager, if that helps.

Look into Jesus as a historical figure, if that helps too.

Baby steps. :thumbsup:

But you don’t practice what you preach, do you? No atheist does. If you do, then please demonstrate that the universe has “natural” origins, which is what you must believe as an atheist.

For our OP Hukeyohi, what this poster has done is to demonstrate to you that the atheist position is every bit as much based on faith (belief in things not proven) as the theist position. To not believe in God is to believe in some other explanation for the existence of everything, but this other explanation, whatever it may be, is also not provable, is also based on their own faith in the non-existence of God.

Any worldview is based on faith, in belief in things not proven or explainable. So OP, you must ask yourself why you have faith in the non-existence of God, when you have no proof that the universe has natural origins.

BTW, another thing that you (Hukeyohi) said is interesting. You said that you don’t want to discover after 80 years that you have been living a lie. Well, why not? After you die, if there is no God, you won’t be discovering anything, so why should you care? If there’s no God, no life after death, then it doesn’t matter if you’ve been living a lie that there is a God? But if there is God and life after death, then it will matter very much if you have been living the lie that there is no God. Something to ponder.

I suggest getting a copy of *Handbook of Christian Apologetics *by Peter Kreeft and Ronald K. Tacelli. It contains 20 arguments for the existence of God. It also shows why faith and reason do not conflict. This is simply the best book I have found on the subject. You can find it here: amazon.com/Handbook-Christian-Apologetics-Hundreds-Questions/dp/0830817743/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1239807981&sr=8-1

Hi hukeyohi,

I went from Agnostic to Catholic, but in a different way than you are trying to. My (then) girlfriend was Catholic and we were serious, we wanted to be married, and even though she wasn’t too into her faith at that time, she knew that she wanted to get married in the Catholic Church, and I really didn’t care. I’d been raised with some kind of pseudo-secular knowledge that there was this thing called a Bible that I tried to read as a child (but gave up at the “begats”) and that people believed in Jesus, but I had no idea who he was or why people cared about religion or faith.

But anyway, mostly to make her happy I went though RCIA and was baptized, confirmed and received first communion. I had a shoddy catechumenate and I can’t remember taking a single thing away from it. I just knew the important things, like what to do in mass and that they believed that the Eucharist was Jesus and that I couldn’t receive until I was Catholic. So I practiced standing, kneeling and sitting when I was supposed to.

After I was brought in to the church at the Easter Vigil 2000, I felt close to Jesus in some way but I didn’t understand it. I went to daily mass for awhile. But for years I fell away from my faith, and we didn’t go to mass very often.

Finally many years later I had a big life event happen and my wife wanted to turn to her faith, and I needed to. That is when I discovered how beautiful and true the Catholic faith is. And personally I think that that is the best way to learn it. Accept that it is true first, and then strive to understand why. You will find out why. Since they have the whole truth, everything fits together perfectly and you soon realize the profound depth to the Catholic faith. You could study it your whole life and never learn close to everything.

For me, I always believed in God because I could not explain the beginning of the universe, and how it came to be. That bugged me so bad that I was convinced that there was a God. When I was lucky enough to find a faithful woman who led me to the true faith, that is when I came to believe in the God who created that Universe and who loves me beyond my comprehension.

So my advice - accept that everything the Church teaches is true and then don’t be afraid to probe the depths. If you go through RCIA and don’t receive a good answer, come to these forums, or even private message me. Every Catholic who realizes that they have the whole truth has absolutely no fear to test the doctrine of the Catholic church, because it always makes sense, it always works out.

God Bless,

Andre

Hello
I lost faith years ago when i was a teenager, and recently i had my daughter, and i feel God calling me, i cant explain why i had a sudden feeling wanting to go to church, but i did go and make new friends. I was born into Catholic family, but my dad doesnt follow or believe any religion, so we had to make our own decision when we older, i made mine when i had my daughter last August, i thank God everyday for giving me such a beautiful healthy baby girl.
I start going to church last year, and like you i feel kinda silly being there and i had no idea how to pray or what im saying, but the more i go i feel more at home and happy being there, i just got baptise on Easter Saturday, it was a special moment for me.
I still dont know how to pray or do sometimes wonder if God exist? i think thats what makes us all human we have to question what we cant see or feel, we need proofs.
I didnt start reading the bible, i start on smaller steps, a family friend gave me Rosary beads and a booklet on how to use it, i start with that, say my prayers and follow the booklet and start reading Catechism Of The Catholic Church, this was given to me by Fr Tom who baptise me, also every Wednesday i see Fr Tom with some others for Talks of the New Faith.
I think you need to think positive thoughts and dont try so hard to want to believe in God, becasue i think you already do or you wont be here having any of these thoughts and because of years of not believing that gave you negative thoughts, we all question what we dont understand.
Start with simple prayer everyday, go to church, and think positive always, because i think you think so hard of being religious you get so work up about getting things wrong, just like me, but i learn to push all that aside and just simple prayer everyday and ask God to gave me strength, be a good christian thats all you need, and we all will learn in our own time.

God bless

I just finish reading other replies on the question, and cant believe some comments people make and so mean, if you are true Catholic’s then you shoulndt judge this guy so nastyly, we as Christians shouldnt look down or be mean to non Catholic’s, thats why he’s here, he want some advise and help strengthen his faith in God.
So please dont make nasty comments about anyone’s faith, you only make his feeling worse, just becasue people dont believe in God doesnt mean they corrupt by satan or whatever, they just need some guidance by good Christians.

God Bless

This is a good start… in fact, I suspect that many of us Catholics have moments where our faith is as much wanting to believe as it is actual belief. Don’t let that discourage you.

I’ve tried hard to believe that there is a God but every time I try and pray, I get this powerful feeling that I’m being an idiot and what I’m doing has really no point.

Just a question to ask yourself; if God does not exist, and if death truly is the end, then is there really any point to anything? If we accept the the atheist/materialist position, then humans and indeed all living creatures are simply collections of chemicals that react for a while before breaking down.

Now, naturally, most would say “Can you please prove to me that there is a God” yet I know that defeats the purpose of faith. What’s worse, is my family used to be heavily mormon and I’ve reviewed it all in my head with the conclusion of rubbish but I have this feeling I may be making a huge mistake labeling it as such.

Proof per say, is probably impossible. That being said, there are certain ideas that seem, to me, to suggest the existence of God. Most powerful to me is the notion that modern science believes that there was literally nothing before Big Bang. Essentially our Universe was created ex nihilo. But what could cause that? (This is essentially a variation on Aristotle’s Unmoved Mover argument).

,__, I’m lost in this pool of I don’t know what’s true - The logical bit of me seems right but intution says it’s not. My catholic girlfriend has been trying to help me but I don’t know what to do. If I were to die tomorrow, I don’t want to be damned but if I were to die 80 years from now, I don’t want to have been living a lie.

If rationally you see a reason to belief, but your intuition is tripping you up, you should keep in mind that intuition has frequently tripped people up in the past. It wasn’t until Galileo that we figured out that light objects fell as fast as heavy objects because our guts told us otherwise; likewise, we knew that time flowed the same everywhere until Relativity came around to tell us we were wrong. Intuition is trained by experience, but experiences can be misleading. Give yourself time to retrain your intuition.

Can someone help me? How can I find God? I’ve tried reading the bible, I’ve tried praying (and as far as I know my prayers go seemingly unanswered), and I’ve even been to Catholic church. I can’t, however, seem to grasp a logical answer that my brain wont fight itself with about that ultimate topic that many people struggle with all the time. ‘God and his existence.’

Just remember, God answers your prayers, but he does it on his timescale and in his way… and sometimes, indeed most of the time, he does not give us what we ask for but what we need.

My girlfriend tried to explain it to me earlier but I ended up crying ;_;

How do I go from Agnostic to Catholic?
Help please :frowning:

Take your time, think and pray. Ultimately though, it is a leap of faith.


Bill

Welcome Hukeyohi! :slight_smile:

Praying for you.

:gopray:

I don’t believe that the universe has natural origins.

An atheist is not required to believe that the universe started via a natural process.

For our OP Hukeyohi, what this poster has done is to demonstrate to you that the atheist position is every bit as much based on faith (belief in things not proven) as the theist position. **To not believe in God is to believe in some other explanation for the existence of everything, but this other explanation, **whatever it may be, is also not provable, is also based on their own faith in the non-existence of God.

You are setting up a false choice here. You are saying that a person must choose between:

(1) Absolute 100% certainty that the universe was created by a divine entity
(2) Absolute 100% certainty that the universe began without the action of a divine entity

This choice does not need to me made. A person can say “I don’t know”. I do this.

I’d be very interested to hear you expand on this supernatural-but-not-God view.

You are setting up a false choice here. You are saying that a person must choose between:

(1) Absolute 100% certainty that the universe was created by a divine entity
(2) Absolute 100% certainty that the universe began without the action of a divine entity

This choice does not need to me made. A person can say “I don’t know”. I do this.

But then you must rationally live your life as if God existed, because the stakes are quite literally infinite. But how many agnostics live such a life?

But beyond that, all I was actually doing is pointing out that those who do not believe in God, and who say there is no evidence (or not enough evidence) of God, never apply that standard to their own implicit belief in a non-God alternative.

The fact that we must all acknowledge is that the universe exists. Or, if you don’t accept that, then the fact that the thinker’s consciousness exists. Such existence demands an explanation. The explanation may be God, or it may be something else, but if one is to test the possibilities according to the evidence, that test should be applied equally to all possibilities. And that is something atheists and agnostics never do in my experience.

Faith is a gift and it comes from God through the Church.

If you have never been to a mass ask your gf to take you to a morning weekday mass - but get there 15 minutes or so early at least. Most parishes have a mass around 7AM or 7:30AM every day. If you can’t make it due to work etc. then try to go to Saturday morning mass - but again get there early.

Sit in the back and just listen. Don’t talk - just clear your mind and take in the solitude and the serenity. Look for the tabernacle and the red glass candle cover that is suspended usually from a gold chain near the tabernacle. You will see a soft candle burning under the red lens – it is a reminder that Jesus is present in the tabernacle. A small amount of consecrated eucharist wafers are in the tabernacle for emergencies (Viaticum) to be given to the sick and in the event a priest needs to give last rights to a dieing person and to give to the congregation if a priest becomes indisposed and can’t consecrate more hosts. That is Jesus in the tabernacle - substantially present in body, blood, soul and divinity. You might want to sit close to the tabernacle or if comfortable with it walk up and kneel before the tabernacle and just silently contemplate what is before you - its very peaceful and awe inspiring. Say just a few simple prayers mentally – maybe something like “Jesus I place my trust in you - please teach me your ways and nurture my faith in you.”

Look around at the other faithful who will be arriving and silently praying. You will see all types - elderly, some widowed, young single mothers, couples, a few single men who took time to come in before work others who know each other since they have been going for years to daily mass etc. Take in the character of those who you see and observe that they all have a very somber and pious look to them - often inwardly reflecting while in prayer. These are the “real faithful” – people who are not lip-service Christians but rather people who are there to be in the presence of Jesus not out of obligation but because they want to be there and can’t bear to be away from His presence until the next mass.

This is my recommendation - pick up your faith by observing how Christ is living in others and seeing how “real” these other pious people are. Watch how they genuflect or bow out of reverence when they pass in front of the altar or the tabernacle. Observe how they often will kneel in silent prayer.

This my friend is how you can stir your faith up within you.

James

I don’t believe that the universe started via supernatural/divine action.

[quote]You are setting up a false choice here. You are saying that a person must choose between:

(1) Absolute 100% certainty that the universe was created by a divine entity
(2) Absolute 100% certainty that the universe began without the action of a divine entity

This choice does not need to me made. A person can say “I don’t know”. I do this.

But then you must rationally live your life as if God existed, because the stakes are quite literally infinite. But how many agnostics live such a life?
[/quote]

Which god? There are thousands of gods that have been written about, and many have conflicting rules for their followers. By living your life according to one god, you are blaspheming against a thousand others.

But beyond that, all I was actually doing is pointing out that those who do not believe in God, and who say there is no evidence (or not enough evidence) of God, never apply that standard to their own implicit belief in a non-God alternative.

An atheist or agnostic does not implicitly believe in a non-god alternative. When discussing the start of the universe, it is possible (and very common) to disbelieve “the christian god did it”, and disbelive e.g. “multiverse theory”, and say “I don’t know”. Effectively holding no belief on this issue.

The fact that we must all acknowledge is that the universe exists. Or, if you don’t accept that, then the fact that the thinker’s consciousness exists. Such existence demands an explanation. The explanation may be God, or it may be something else, but if one is to test the possibilities according to the evidence, that test should be applied equally to all possibilities.

I agree with this.

My point is that, upon seeing the available evidence, a decision does not have to be made. It is perfectly valid (and most rational imo) to say “There is not enough evidence at the moment to conclude that any of the proposed possibilities are true”

Hello,
Perhaps I shouldnt say this but… I would first try to look at mere Christianity before you think about Catholicism. The Catholic church has a lot of doctrines that seem strange to non believers and protestants alike. Therefore, I would start of by considering Christianity generally and then look at the Catholic Church.

I think the best advise I could give you to help you in developing your faith is to continuously read the Gospels. If you do, you will realize one thing, your Love for Jesus. I am sure you have never encountered anyone like him in all your readings and study. It is almost impossible not to fall in Love with him. His words and actions break your heart in its wisdom and beauty.

For example, in the book a Case for Christ, Lee Strobel tells the story of when he interviewed Charles Templeton (an ex Evangelical Christian turned agnostic). Despite all the negative words Charles Templeton had to say about theism, when he was asked what he thought about Jesus Christ himself he said," He was… the greatest human being who has ever lived. He was a moral genius … his commitment was total and led to his own death… what could I say about him except that this was a form of greatness… he is the most important thing in my life and …I…I…I adore him!." Upon hearing this, Lee Strobel who was interviewing him writes, I wasnt sure how to respond, “You say that with some emotion” To which Templeton says, “well yes, everything good I know, everthing decent I know, everything pure I know, I learned from Jesus… There have been many other wonderful people but Jesus is Jesus… he is the most important human being who has ever existed and If I may put it this way I miss him.” At this point his voice cracked and he broke down crying.

I find that passage interesting because even a hard core agnostic like Templeton recognize the beuty of Jesus. I am also reminded of a book titled Ben Israel by Art Katz in which he tells the story of his conversion. He says how he lost his Jewish faith during vietnam and he spent many years studying Buddhism, Islam and other world religions. He had read all the holy books in the world exept the new testament and still found life meaningless. Finally, while waiting for a train he decided he was going to commit suicide. But there by the train station a man was selling books one of which happened to be the New Testament. So he figures… why not read the New Testament since he has already read all the other religious books, might as well read this one before he dies.

So he gets on the train and starts reading the Gospels and falls in Love with Jesus. He doesnt believe in him, he just thinks he is an incredible character. He gets to the story about the prostitute in which the Pharasis ask him if they should stone the woman before them who was caught in adultery. At that point Art Katz thinks to himself… Ha! they got him. No one can escape that trap. If he says stone her, he isnt God. If he says dont stone her, then he is violating Jewish law and so he isnt God. Either way he is traped. So he closes the book, climbs on top of the train and is about to jump off and kill himself. But something compels him to finish the story so he reads about how Jesus simply writes in the sand and he closes it and thinks, “see! I knew it… he has nothing to say”. And yet, something tells him to finish the story so right before he jumps off the train he opens the book and reads Jesus words to the Pharasis, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” And upon reading that he thinks, “This is God!” And thus begins his commitment to Christ.

I guess what I am trying to tell you is that you need to realize who you are as an individual and who Jesus is to come to believe in him. Are you good and righteous man who has complete self control and has never felt a longing for meaning? Or are you a sinful individual who does the things he does not want to do and despite your best efforts you continuously sin and have a pang in your heart for meaning in life and a savior to rescue you. Jesus provides an answer to all the deepest questions in your heart, Origin, Meaning, Destiny, Identity. You will not find any other comprehensive and fulfilling answer to these questions outside of Christ. He also provides an answer to the toughest objections to the idea of a loving God. Ravi Zacharias tells the story of a friend of his who was in a concentration camp. One day, the Nazi’s had all of the inmates come outside to witness the hanging of a couple of inmates. Two of them were older individuals and one of them was younger. When the first two were hung, they died instantly but when the third younger inmate was hanged, he struggled greatly. His entire body was contorting left and right desperately trying to cling on to life with his last breath. As his body was flaying on that noose many of the inmates began to weep and shout “God! God! Where ARE YOU!, Save Us! Help Us! Where Are You!” And Ravi’s friends recounts how inside of him, he too asked that question as he watched this young man die, “God where are you.” And he says that after silently asking that question he got a response inside that told him, “I am up there in the gallows… where else?”

Christ answers our deepest longings and through his life, he demonstrates that Love is Stronger than Death.

If you have not read the Gospels, I would highly encourage you do so. Ask yourself who am I, and who is Jesus. James Stewart has an excellent response to this:
“He was the meekest and lowliest of all the sons of man, yet He spoke of coming on the clouds of Heaven with the glory of God. He was so austere that evil spirits and demons cried out in terror at His coming, yet He was so genial and winsome and approachable that the children loved to play with Him and the little ones nestled in his arms. His presence at the innocent gaiety of a village wedding was like the presence of sunshine. No one was half so compassionate to sinners, yet no one ever spoke such red-hot scorching words about sin. A bruised reed He would not break, His whole life was love, yet on one occasion He demanded of the Pharisees how they were expected to escape the damnation of Hell. He was a dreamer of dreams and a seer of visions, yet for sheer stark realism He has all our sheer stark realists soundly beaten. He was a servant of all, washing the disciples’ feet, yet masterfully he strode into the temple and the hucksters and moneychangers fell over one another to get away from the mad rush and the fire they saw blazing in His eyes. He saved others, yet at the last himself he did not save. There is nothing in history like the union of contrasts which confronts us in the gospels. The mystery of Jesus is the mystery of divine personality”

I would stress to be honest with yourself and examine your deepest longings in life for meaning. An atheistic and agnostic life will lead to deep inner pain. A book I highly recommend is Man’s Search For Meaning by Victor Frankl. In this book, Frankl writes a personal essay about his experince as a prisoner in Auschwitz and other concentration
camps for five years, and his struggle during this time to find reasons to live.

Two quick passages that I cant resist quoting. Both deal with who man is and who God is.

The first: “We have come to know man as he really is. After all, man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those gas chambers upright, with the Lord’s prayer or the Shema Yisrael on his lips.”

The second:

*Perhaps there came a day for some of us when we saw the same film
again, or a similar one. But by then other pictures may have
simultaneously unrolled before one’s inner eye; pictures of people who
attained much more in their lives than a sentimental film could show.
Some details of a particular man’s inner greatness may have come to
one’s mind, like the story of the young woman whose death I witnessed
in a concentration camp. It is a simple story. There is little to tell
and it may sound as if I had invented it; but to me it seems like a
poem.

This young woman knew that she would die in the next few days. But when
I talked to her she was cheerful in spite of this knowledge. “I am
grateful that fate has hit me so hard,” she told me. "In my former life
I was spoiled and did not take spiritual accomplishments seriously."
Pointing through the window of the hut, she said, “This tree here is
the only friend I have in my loneliness.” Through that window she could
see just one branch of a chestnut tree, and on the branch were two
blossoms. “I often talk to this tree,” she said to me. I was startled
and didn’t quite know how to take her words. Was she delirious? Did she
have occasional hallucinations? Anxiously I asked her if the tree
replied. “Yes.” What did it say to her? She answered, “It said to me,
‘I am here — I am here — I am life, eternal life.’” … *

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