Help! Please!


#1

Ok, need help here. One of my co-workers (we work at a gym, so it’s very layed back) continues to make comments about sexual abuse and priests (in as repugnant a way as possible). My problem? Get really mad and can’t think and thereby can’t answer…These are generally passing comments or “witticisms” I’ve tried to gently mention that they offend me…Help! How can I be loving and stand up for my beliefs…
God bless,
k


#2

Hi Katieq!

Rotten deal. Sometimes I find that I’ve had to point out that the stats on these occurences are about the same as n-C clergy and lower than among educators.

Scandal In the Church may help a bit.

Another thing that I’ve pointed out is that is one is going to condemn any religion for the moral failings of their leaders then all of Christianity falls from the outset, since Jesus’s handpicked 12 were pretty lame as well. One sold Him out for pay and then hanged himself in despair. They all lost their nerve and fled when He got busted and prior to that they couldn’t even hang with Him to pray. Peter denied Him three times before the sun came up, and all of them went off and hid after he died. Mary and John were the only ones at the cross at all. One wouldn’t believe until he saw the wounds…

If all else fails get the person in front of your boss and tell them straight off that they know you are a Catholic and that these remarks are offensive and that you’ve tried to be nice about it, but it’s reaching the harrassment stage and needs to stop.

Remember that “loving” does not equate with “doormat”.


#3

I get that from people sometimes too.

I didn’t read BlackKnight’s link, and so some of the information I’m about to give you might be in there, and I heard this info. from Catholic Radio…I forgot who the speaker was, but they were addressing the scandel and the results of the internal investigation.

Here are the statistics…1.9% of priests have been involved

Of the cases that have been proven truely abusive…90% of those were not with children, but with post pubescent young men…in other words, this speaker was saying that it wasn’t so much of a pedifile problem that we have, as much as it is a problem with Homosexuality…

Of the priests that did these atrocities…around 98 or 99 percent (I forget exactly, but remember the # as extremely high) were homosexual.

The real kicker is the fact that protestants are having the same difficulty, but since they are not united, it seems isolated, but hard numbers tell a different story. It is a problem we are having in society generally, and is easily illustrated in an institution as large as the Catholic Church.

I have noticed that when someone starts the “Pedifile Priest” jokes, and I give hard factual evidence with statistics to back it …they shut up really quickly…don’t know why that is…maybe they realize THIS Catholic won’t lie down quietly, and possibly even they have knowledge of the predjudice of the media.

The thing that REALLY Irks me is what happened in my hometown. The priest that baptised me was accused of rape. They posted it on the front page, and I was extremely upset. That was three years ago, and not a word of it has come up since, leading me to believe that they were false charges which were dismissed…but I’ll never know…because they didn’t print another word…NOT FAIR


#4

Lillith, as always, you give me hope.

May God bless you and your family richly,
RyanL


#5

[quote=RyanL]Lillith, as always, you give me hope.

May God bless you and your family richly,
RyanL
[/quote]

Right back at you Ryan…with your new little family!


#6

[quote=katieq]Ok, need help here. One of my co-workers (we work at a gym, so it’s very layed back) continues to make comments about sexual abuse and priests (in as repugnant a way as possible). My problem? Get really mad and can’t think and thereby can’t answer…These are generally passing comments or “witticisms” I’ve tried to gently mention that they offend me…Help! How can I be loving and stand up for my beliefs…
God bless,
k
[/quote]

Hey, Katie, I sympathize. Maybe you could prepare yourself ahead of time with a prayer that you can say quietly when your co-worker starts up. It is always helpful for me to even just breathe the Holy Name of Jesus when I am not sure how to respond to something. He will hear and answer your prayer, and maybe prompt you to answer with confidence.

Peace,
magdalisa


#7

[quote=katieq]Ok, need help here. One of my co-workers (we work at a gym, so it’s very layed back) continues to make comments about sexual abuse and priests (in as repugnant a way as possible). My problem? Get really mad and can’t think and thereby can’t answer…These are generally passing comments or “witticisms” I’ve tried to gently mention that they offend me…Help! How can I be loving and stand up for my beliefs…
God bless,
k
[/quote]

The sneakest defense is none. Turn the other cheek.

I think of the old cartoons where there is a gang with battering ram approaching the front door. The house was not strong enough so what do they do? Open the front and back doors, and watch the aggressors run right through the house and off the cliff behind it.

I had a very honest and God-fearing boss once, and he simply did not react at all when people used vulgar terms. He just stood there and didn’t even flinch, but also didn’t reward by acting like he was agreeing with the use of the word. Never did he use such words when he spoke. Eventually people started talking more like him, and it cleaned up a bit.

In other words, use them as spiritual tests to see how above them you can be. If they are merely annoying, learn to ride the storm peacefully without having to awaken the Lord and have Him call you faithless! Just imagine that you have never heard those words in your life, and you just disregard them as if they were mere coughing. Don’t even acknowledge them, but then ask him back, “do I understand you to say” and then repeat his message with gentle words as a form of quiet demonstration.

If he cares about what you think, you can take the opposite approach and try being up front with him, when he has a minute and isn’t distracted.

Hopefully it doesn’t become an issue you need management intervention for, but if it does, I wish you well because I’ve heard that can be a difficult road.

Alan


#8

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