help please

I am just figuring out what discernment is and have several questions:

Should everybody discern? (i guess the alternative would be doing noting with your life)

Assuming yes, how do I give up liking someone in order to start discernment? (I am finding it impossible, especially with thoughts such as “why would God even let me be friends with her in the first place”, or "why has He given me so many opportunities to become friends with her if He just wants me to forget about this ")… Motivating verses from the Holy Bible, advice from experience, and prayer would be a blessing, thank you.

I wish Christ would just wrap His arms around me and say, “dont worry, i got it handled, this is what you need to do”

You know I am in the exact situation as you. Though I know what God wana me to do and it break my heart. I had a vision of him saying I was his priest but I need to tell this girl I love her. However once I tell her that he said to move on and use that love for others

Everyone needs to discern. I will keep You in my prayers.

God wants us all to discern His Will for our lives. If/When you discern that He is calling you to become a priest or religious, you have free will to choose what to do. God’s Will is always the best choice because what He wants for us is always better than what we can imagine or hope for ourselves. Wishing you peace and joy in Christ! (and praying for you, too!)
RC :slight_smile:

I believe the thing you need to focus on is prayer, frequenting the sacraments, and talking to a priest.

I don’t think discernment means you stop liking someone. It’s putting something good on hold while you discern a potentially greater good: religious life or priesthood.

A vocation is a grace from God. To open yourself to that grace, you would lead a prayerful life, enriched by the sacrament of reconciliation and the Eucharist.

Christ said something to the effect that those who gave up good things, family, wealth, and status for his sake would stand to gain a hundred-fold in heaven. As a religious or priest, you conform yourself more closely to the image of Christ and you die in that state.

Imagine being more perfectly happy. St. Therese’s sister showed her a thimble and a glass. She filled them with water and asked, “which is more full?” They were both full, but the glass was obviously greater. In a similar fashion, you will have greater happiness as a religious - if that’s your calling.

Worse it can come to, you visit a monastery or enter a seminary, and you find yourself happy. If you find yourself miserable, you can leave, start up a family, and be happy. Boldly entering into discernment is a sure way to be happy. You have a vocation, you’re happy. You’re miserable pursuing a vocations, you quit, and you find happiness as secular.

How long will i discern before God gives me an answer? And in what form will that answer be?

P.S. please say a quick prayer for my strength discerning today.

The vocations director for my diocese (who is very good at what he does) has told me that there’s nothing wrong with dating while discerning. If you took a serious step towards a religious or priestly vocation (for ex: entered seminary, joined a monastery, etc.) then it would not be appropriate for you to continue dating someone, but unless you take a big step like that, it’s fine to date someone. Dating someone IS a form of discernment, because you’re seeing whether or not you’re compatible with that person, whether you truly feel called to marriage, etc (remember, marriage is a vocation just as much as priesthood is).

If you do get involved in a relationship, you can continue to investigate priesthood or religious life as well (visit religious communities, talk with your pastor about what priesthood is like, visit a seminary, etc.) You should make it known to the girl that you’re still discerning your vocation, but if she’s ok with that, I see no problem in dating while discerning.

The most important thing is to foster a strong prayer life, and be open to whatever God calls you to.

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