Help requested


#1

Okay, I am having “some” difficulty with my fundamentalist friend again and I would like some help on giving him scriptures to “jar” him once again into seeing that he is not treating people the was God would want him to, or something like that. About a year ago I was on here and after some of the help you all gave me, and some stuff I got out of Rome Sweet Home, I was able to have good "discussions’ about the Bible (at least good for me) with my friend. I kept harping on the “Two Pillars of Truth,” about how sola scriptura and sola fila are not Biblical, and to my amazement he gave up on every conversation since when I bring them back up again. The thing I find as odd is he took a trip to Rome in December, I was praying he would see the light, so to speak, while he was there.

Now, he has been ignoring me for the most part again. This week my grandmom passed away, I had lived with her all of my life, except for the past 15 months when we had to put her in a nursing home as she needed 24 hour care. So she was a second mother to me. I tried to text my friend on Sunday afternoon to talk to as he is religious, I wanted to talk to him about my grandmom being in the hospital, and how I was really worried this time, and that I didn’t think she would make it. He texted me back saying he had the flu and couldn’t talk, I never was able to talk to him, 14 hours later my grandmom passed away.

Now, should I let him off because of him “saying” he has the flu and can’t talk? Or should I take into account that he has ignored me in the past as well? In the past when he has done this I quoted scripture it sorta woke him up for him to see he is turning his back on a brother in Christ. The thing that gets me is I am in need, I am really really lonely now, as well as down, and he has turned his back on me in my time of need, a need to talk to someone I admire, as a “friend.” But I cannot just walk away from, people, not him, not anyone, I just need some hard things to point out to him how he does not follow what he says he is. Odd thing is, he is the one who got me back into begin more religious, got me to go out and get my own Bible (a Catholic one).

I sent him a voicemail last night on things I wanted to point out in the Bible. I asked him to read Leviticus 19, 17-18, and 1 John 4, 7-21 but paying very close attention to 19-21.

Is there anything else, or any other scriptures any of you all think I could send to him to kind of help “jar” him again? As I said in the past he has come around, but he usually forgets what he has learned.

Thanks in advance.


#2

[quote=Blake002]Okay, I am having “some” difficulty with my fundamentalist friend again and I would like some help on giving him scriptures to “jar” him once again into seeing that he is not treating people the was God would want him to, or something like that. About a year ago I was on here and after some of the help you all gave me, and some stuff I got out of Rome Sweet Home, I was able to have good "discussions’ about the Bible (at least good for me) with my friend. I kept harping on the “Two Pillars of Truth,” about how sola scriptura and sola fila are not Biblical, and to my amazement he gave up on every conversation since when I bring them back up again. The thing I find as odd is he took a trip to Rome in December, I was praying he would see the light, so to speak, while he was there.

Now, he has been ignoring me for the most part again. This week my grandmom passed away, I had lived with her all of my life, except for the past 15 months when we had to put her in a nursing home as she needed 24 hour care. So she was a second mother to me. I tried to text my friend on Sunday afternoon to talk to as he is religious, I wanted to talk to him about my grandmom being in the hospital, and how I was really worried this time, and that I didn’t think she would make it. He texted me back saying he had the flu and couldn’t talk, I never was able to talk to him, 14 hours later my grandmom passed away.

Now, should I let him off because of him “saying” he has the flu and can’t talk? Or should I take into account that he has ignored me in the past as well? In the past when he has done this I quoted scripture it sorta woke him up for him to see he is turning his back on a brother in Christ. The thing that gets me is I am in need, I am really really lonely now, as well as down, and he has turned his back on me in my time of need, a need to talk to someone I admire, as a “friend.” But I cannot just walk away from, people, not him, not anyone, I just need some hard things to point out to him how he does not follow what he says he is. Odd thing is, he is the one who got me back into begin more religious, got me to go out and get my own Bible (a Catholic one).

I sent him a voicemail last night on things I wanted to point out in the Bible. I asked him to read Leviticus 19, 17-18, and 1 John 4, 7-21 but paying very close attention to 19-21.

Is there anything else, or any other scriptures any of you all think I could send to him to kind of help “jar” him again? As I said in the past he has come around, but he usually forgets what he has learned.

Thanks in advance.
[/quote]

Hello Blake.

If your friend is not ready to discuss things in the manner that you wish, you cannot force him. Apologetics is a defense of the faith. If he comes to you with a teaching that is opposed to Catholic doctrine, then you can engage him. Otherwise, pray for him everyday. Your prayers will help him immensely!

Secondly, do not despair and try not to dwell on your feelings of loneliness. Christ is with you always. Talk to Him. Receive Him in the Holy Eucharist. Lay your burdens at the foot of the cross and let Jesus be your guide. His yoke is easy.

Remember, Judas fell into despair but did not repent–and he was lost. Peter fell into despair when he denied Jesus. Peter wept bitter tears and repented–and you know the rest. :slight_smile:

This is a difficult time for you because you lost your beloved grandmother. Let Jesus soothe your aching heart. He will never let you down. Trust in Jesus!

God bless you,
Mickey


#3

First of all condolences on the loss of your beloved grandmother. May she rest in the arms of Jesus and Mary. :heart:

And let me also offer you friendship during your time of grief. I too know what it is to grief for loved ones having lost both my parents before either of them grew old. Naturally, you miss your grandmother who was so dear to you. But in time you will be able to look back at all the great things she did and the life you shared with her and smile at such memories. Just let yourself grieve now and know that you are loved by all of heaven as well as by your brothers and sisters in Christ here on earth.

As to your friend, I have to agree with Mickey. You are pushing him too hard out of your desire to have him “see” and so are driving him away.

You see, he isn’t happy that what he has always assumed as a Protestant isn’t true. You have, in effect, pulled the rug out from under him and so he doesn’t want to have you do any more to destroy his beliefs than you already have–that’s the way he sees it.

You cannot and will not convert him. That is the job of the Holy Spirit. All you can do is share the truths of the Church with him and live your life as a faithful Catholic before him. Trying to get him to accept what he doesn’t want to/isn’t ready for is actually a form of abuse, although you had no such intentions, I’m sure. You’ve just been a bit overly zealous.

Give him time to recover himself and let him come to you. And if he does, then don’t push anything on him but let him ask the questions. And you be ready to answer or find the answer, and of course, pray for him out of love for his soul.


#4

Thanks for the responses, and condolences. One thing on my friend, he has been the one in the past 18 months who has always questioned me about my faith, and more-less talking down about Catholics, and what we believe in, the some old stuff most fundamentalist try to debate, even though he was a Catholic growing up. But he was the only one in his family who went to church throughout school, and he started questioning things, and going to about 4 or 5 different denominations searching for answers. Well, he found a place that excepted him with open arms, and from what he has said basically “scared” him into what they believe.

About a year ago he would question me, and about being Catholic, questioning everything such as praying to the Saints, Mary, departed ones who has says can’t hear the prayers anyway, and how we call Priest “Father,” the same old stuff fundamentalist always try to sell. Because of him I was searching online to help me in our “discussions” he through at my feet, and went out to buy my own Bible, so I do give him credit for pushing me that far. But when I started searching I had answers, I could actually put up a good debate, if the debate was through text messages it got to be many hours before he found something he “thought” he could rebut me on. One day he called, and as usual he started talking about religion, which I am okay with, but this day I held firm on the Sola Fila and Sola Scripture issues, as fundamentalist usually do when they see they are “stuck” he tried to change the subject, I would not allow him to do so, I told him we are talking about these two subjects and unless he shows me proof that I am wrong, then I am 100% correct. Since then I have talked to him as he discussed other subjects concerning religion, but I really think the Sola Fila and Sola Scripture issues are still on his mind. I just thought it was odd, he of all people would travel to Rome? even had pics of the Vatican, I was praying he would see what we have in our faith. It’s not that I am pursuing that he sees what being Catholic is all about and accept it, it’s that he claims he is always right, and that he is a much better Christian than me, and other Catholics. So when he brings this stuff up I try to show him where he is wrong, in thinking he is better, and I do as he does to me, I tell him to look at certain scriptures, and explain how he is wrong, but I don’t let him go from subject to subject, I stand firm and tell him we will discuss the one or two things we are discussing, and not venture out onto others.

But the thing I was needing help on was when we talk, I mentioned the two scriptures in the first post, and was looking for others. I texted him, emailed him, and called him two years ago when his grandfather was in very poor health, and died, I was there for him, in prayer as well. But now as I need him, a friend, but all I get from him is “im sick” and he can’t talk, I didn’t even get any condolences. It’s just he says how much more of a Christian he is than me, and how im doing things all wrong, and how us Catholics have things all wrong, he thinks he has all the answers. But a friend, and a brother in Christ is in need, and he turns his back, yet he “claims” he is better and he is right in his thinkings?


#5

Well, not much after my last post, my friend did call, and did listen about what is going on this week with everything.


#6

My prayers go up for you and your grandmom.

You need help with more Scirpture?

Bible Cheat Sheet

I will also remind you, that our job is not to convince anyone. Ours is to plant seeds and allow the Holy Spirit to do the convincing.

It appears as if your friend is not ready to hear the truth of the Catholic Church from you yet. You seem to have pushed it too hard, rushing it in your time and not God’s time.

Because of this, unfortunately, your friendship may have been damaged and your friend may be having a hard time getting past it to offer you the support you need in your grief, although it seems he is trying.

Be patient. Pray. Let things happen in God’s timing.

God Bless,
Maria


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