High Heeled shoes for young girls?


#1

At what age do you feel it is appropriate for a young Catholic lady to wear slip-on kitten heeled shoes? My daughter is 14 and she thinks it is O.K for her to wear to a local youth group social. I feel that this type of shoe has traditionally been associated with ‘ladies of the evening’. But in todays society it is a common type of footwear. What do you practising, orthodox Catholic folks think? Give me your :twocents: worth :thumbsup:


#2

Personally I think 14 is a fine age, provided that the heels aren’t too high and/or sexy, like black lace-up stiletto shoes.

14 is the age I remember my Catholic friends starting to wear heels. I am an 18-year-old Catholic young lady myself, but as I had topped six feet by age 14 and am currently 6’2, I never have worn heels, as I never wanted any help in that department! :smiley:


#3

Kitten heels are very low and cute and modest, IMO. I wouldn’t have a problem with it at all.


#4

[quote=Princess_Abby]Kitten heels are very low and cute and modest, IMO. I wouldn’t have a problem with it at all.
[/quote]

I agree. See what the other 14 year olds are wearing at church or ask other moms.

I only wore heels of not more than an inch or 1 1/2 inches, until I was a senior in college. At that time, I was joining an honor fraternity and could barely walk in spike heels. It was funny, but embarrassing.


#5

[quote=OnFireForChrist]At what age do you feel it is appropriate for a young Catholic lady to wear slip-on kitten heeled shoes? My daughter is 14 and she thinks it is O.K for her to wear to a local youth group social. I feel that this type of shoe has traditionally been associated with ‘ladies of the evening’. But in todays society it is a common type of footwear. What do you practising, orthodox Catholic folks think? Give me your :twocents: worth :thumbsup:
[/quote]

when I was a girl 8th grade graduation was the typical age for your first pair of heels, usually one-inch, and first stockings (panty-hose were just being introduced, I had silk-stockings with seams, a gift from a hopelessly out of date great aunt, which I was forced to wear in gratitude to her, they must have cost the earth).

never heard of kitten heels, but I am sure ladies of the evening wear all kinds of clothing articles that are also worn by women in general, are you going to ban all of them? what I do notice, in trying to shop for granddaughters, is that retail in general seems intent on dressing 7 yr olds like prositutes, some of these little kids come to church looking like Jodie Foster in that movie she did about teen prostitutes.

I have worn nothing but orthopedic shoes for years, what is the deal with the 6" long pointed toes? can they possibly be comfortable or easy to walk in? They certainly do not look professional and would be banned in any office I managed.


#6

I don’t know what kitten heeled shoes are either. Perhaps the OP could post a picture? I recieved my first pair of heels at 13 or 14. I was so proud. Your daughter won’t look like a prostitute, unless she dresses in very short skirts and tight shirts.

If you buy her heels, have her practice on them before church. The first time on even a low heel can make a young woman feel wobbly.


#7

What are kitten heals? By all means, unless the shoes are trashy looking or might endanger your daughter (falling off or heal too high), let your daughter choose her own shoes whenever possible. I let my daughter wear 4 inch clear plastic heeled shoes to a dance. Very trendy, very high, very unlike anything that I would have bought, yet she never wore them again. It didn’t damn her soul to wear them, she still says her rosaries. However, it gives her the feeling that her choices for appearance are good. That her taste in shoes is acceptable to me. Your daughter needs your approval. Pick your fashion battles carefully, in four years your precious daughter can wear whatever she likes. And remember, in some ways it’s easier for girls to wear high heals than women. Children are used to balancing on skates, scooters, etc. I was surprised by how elegantly my daughter walked in her "glass high heels.’ Not one bit of clunkiness. She was 14-15 years when we bought these shoes.


#8

zappos.com/images/720/7200115/3034-232898-t.jpgzappos.com/images/720/7200115/3034-232899-t.jpgKitten heels, definition from fashion.about.com/cs/glossary/g/bldefkittenheel.htm
**Definition: **The kitten heel – popularized by the beyond-chic Audrey Hepburn – is a femme little heel, usually 1 ½ to 2 inches high, with a girlie little curve to it. It’s a perfect medium between flats (sometimes just way too flat) and high heels (can you say “pain?”).

When to wear: When a parent (and not the girl, because she is still a girl) feels it is appropriate. For most girls, that seems to be around 7th or 8th grade, either for Confirmation if the Diocese confirms that young, or graduation.

These are the same sweet little shoes my adult daughter wore for her Confirmation and graduation from 8th grade, because she could not walk on the 3 inch high heels she desperately wanted when we went shoe shopping.


#9

[quote=OutinChgoburbs]zappos.com/images/720/7200115/3034-232898-t.jpgzappos.com/images/720/7200115/3034-232899-t.jpgKitten heels, definition from fashion.about.com/cs/glossary/g/bldefkittenheel.htm
**Definition: **The kitten heel – popularized by the beyond-chic Audrey Hepburn – is a femme little heel, usually 1 ½ to 2 inches high, with a girlie little curve to it. It’s a perfect medium between flats (sometimes just way too flat) and high heels (can you say “pain?”).

When to wear: When a parent (and not the girl, because she is still a girl) feels it is appropriate. For most girls, that seems to be around 7th or 8th grade, either for Confirmation if the Diocese confirms that young, or graduation.

These are the same sweet little shoes my adult daughter wore for her Confirmation and graduation from 8th grade, because she could not walk on the 3 inch high heels she desperately wanted when we went shoe shopping.
[/quote]

These look very innocent and classy to me. I thought that the OP was speaking of some sort of high stilleto heels. These definitly are not my version of the shoes that a prostitute wears.


#10

[quote=deb1]These look very innocent and classy to me. I thought that the OP was speaking of some sort of high stilleto heels. These definitly are not my version of the shoes that a prostitute wears.
[/quote]

Mine either. But these are kitten heels, and by their very definition, well, “kittenish”. I always thought they went with well-raised young ladies, esp. since they look very fetching, modest and innocent with a nice hat and a croquet mallett.:slight_smile:


#11

Those look fine for an eighth grader or older, for dressy occasions. Make sure they fit well, or she won’t be able to walk normally or even safely in them… no “growing room”, please. This means she should get into the habit of checking the fit of her shoes well before future big events. She’ll only have to wait until a big day, and then try and fail to get into her good shoes once to learn that one.

She should not be allowed to wear heels or pointy-toed shoes on a regular basis, though. Her feet are still forming, and she could deform her toes and arch permanently by wearing improper footwear too often. Stress to her… when that happens, it will be no more high heels of any kind at any time, painfully enforced by her own feet. That has happened to my mom (for other reasons). At age 75, she still misses being able to wear dressy shoes to weddings and to church.


#12

I’d let her wear them too, they are cute, not showy shoes! But, as someone else said, have her practice walking first :wink: And maybe scuff up the bottoms so they aren’t slippery :thumbsup:


#13

I gotta say it depends on the young lady. My 14 yo models and because she does, she carries herself very well and I allow her to wear up to 4 inch heels (depending on the occasion). OTOH…my stepdaughter(still 10 but I am sure this will not change) is the biggest klutz in the world, God love her! At my wedding this past summer I put her in 2 inch candies type shoes…I had her practice walking in them for hours! It was very stressful but she wanted to wear what daughter was wearing. I tried to talk her into flats but hubby didn’t want her to feel “different” so I ended up spending hours teaching her to walk properly…and still she has to be reminded to walk properly in them. At my daughters school (Catholic school) they have a rule about heels having to be 2 inches or less so I would think the kitten heels would be fine.


#14

[quote=Catholic mommy]I’d let her wear them too, they are cute, not showy shoes! But, as someone else said, have her practice walking first :wink: And maybe scuff up the bottoms so they aren’t slippery :thumbsup:
[/quote]

Yes… there’s nothing that kills the poise like the fear of falling. (And no woman should wear clothing that kills her poise, no matter what her age.)

BTW, the practice will go much better with some coaching. It does no good to be steady of foot but with the stomping gait of a 17 year old football player. High heels are by no means self-explanatory.

Oh, and while you’re at it, she might have a few tries at getting in and out of a car gracefully… sit, then swing the feet together, not one foot at a time! Reverse to disembark. If one is going to dress like a grown woman, one needs to know how to act like one, or the effect will be the reverse of what’s intended.


#15

I think a kitten heel is the perfect heel for a 14 year old to start out with. Quite modest and classy. ( I wore bigger heels than that when I was 14! :o )


#16

Those were hard for me to walk in in my 20’s! (I have weak ankles, I guess, and I’d be hard pressed not to wobble!)

Debbie


#17

IMHO no woman should wear high heels (well, above a certain height) because scientists have shown many times that they badly damage the ankle (I’ll post a pic of an x-ray if this thread is still around next month) which is a very complex joint that can’t be repaired - besides, the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and we shouldn’t wreck it so needlessly…

Also, yes it can be sort of ‘immodest dress’ since it is very much considered to make a woman sexy - spokesman for a big high heels company once said that they were all aboput sex and that’s why women should wear them, because “men love it”.

And, women shouldn’t feel like they have to wear something because all the other women are wearing it / social pressure / pressures of fashion / need to conform / all that rubbish. So maybe you’re a short girl - who cares? Some men (including me) think short girls are attractive. Learn to be happy with the height that God made you. If you would prefer to wear flat shoes when the world thinks that you should wear expenisve, uncomfortable, physically damaging shoes then it is the world that is wrong, not you.

Lolz I’ve turned out just like my dad (he was always against these silly fashion trends like high heels and makeup) - but I’m not ashamed of that in the slightest.


#18

[quote=Flopfoot]IMHO no woman should wear high heels (well, above a certain height) because scientists have shown many times that they badly damage the ankle (I’ll post a pic of an x-ray if this thread is still around next month) which is a very complex joint that can’t be repaired - besides, the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and we shouldn’t wreck it so needlessly…

Also, yes it can be sort of ‘immodest dress’ since it is very much considered to make a woman sexy - spokesman for a big high heels company once said that they were all aboput sex and that’s why women should wear them, because “men love it”.

And, women shouldn’t feel like they have to wear something because all the other women are wearing it / social pressure / pressures of fashion / need to conform / all that rubbish. So maybe you’re a short girl - who cares? Some men (including me) think short girls are attractive. Learn to be happy with the height that God made you. If you would prefer to wear flat shoes when the world thinks that you should wear expenisve, uncomfortable, physically damaging shoes then it is the world that is wrong, not you.

Lolz I’ve turned out just like my dad (he was always against these silly fashion trends like high heels and makeup) - but I’m not ashamed of that in the slightest.
[/quote]

If you do not want to wear heels, then fine. I support you in your decision.

Many, many women wear heels without damaging their skeletal structure because they use moderation in the amount of time spent in high heels.

There is nothing wrong in looking attractive, or in wearing modest clothing that makes you look good. When I wear heels and makeup I do it more for me then my husband. I like looking my best and there is nothing wrong about that.


#19

My 12 year old daughter wears shoes as shown above except that the toe is open as she has one toe that is a little bigger on one foot than the other and open toe shoes are much easier for her, she wears them with long skirts and she looks very sweet and not one bit “trashy” I would never let her wear a short short skirt anyways and she only has the one pair of dressy shoes like the above and the rest she likes those big chunky heels, like the 70’s looks, quite ugly in my opinion but very much her age and she also wears ugh boots (spell?) and those are very sweet! :smiley:


#20

[quote=Flopfoot]IMHO no woman should wear high heels (well, above a certain height) because scientists have shown many times that they badly damage the ankle (I’ll post a pic of an x-ray if this thread is still around next month) which is a very complex joint that can’t be repaired - besides, the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and we shouldn’t wreck it so needlessly…

Also, yes it can be sort of ‘immodest dress’ since it is very much considered to make a woman sexy - spokesman for a big high heels company once said that they were all aboput sex and that’s why women should wear them, because “men love it”.

And, women shouldn’t feel like they have to wear something because all the other women are wearing it / social pressure / pressures of fashion / need to conform / all that rubbish. So maybe you’re a short girl - who cares? Some men (including me) think short girls are attractive. Learn to be happy with the height that God made you. If you would prefer to wear flat shoes when the world thinks that you should wear expenisve, uncomfortable, physically damaging shoes then it is the world that is wrong, not you.

Lolz I’ve turned out just like my dad (he was always against these silly fashion trends like high heels and makeup) - but I’m not ashamed of that in the slightest.
[/quote]

While I’d agree that it is good to avoid vanity in dress, the Catholic Church hasn’t gone so far as the Amish have.

I’m a scientist, I’ve seen the x-rays, and I’m telling you that statistically the habit of not wearing seat belts is far worse than wearing high heels once in awhile. Is it bad to do it too much? Well, yes, but too much of many things will ruin your body. Moderation is part of the virtue of temperance.

It is also a virtue to avoid rash judgement. Just because you know the reasons that some women do things does not mean that you know the reason every woman would have for doing the same thing. Hearing high heels is not sinful, per se, and that’s a fact.

If you’d like to keep your opinion humble, you might re-word to “IMHO, women do better to avoid high heels, as they pose a near occasion of sin to more than a few, for the following reasons” and leave it at that.


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