Homeschooled


#1

I've been home schooled almost all my life. I hate it! I understand parents have their reasons for home schooling but do you think the kids should be allowed to choose if they want to be home schooled or public schooled? When people ask me how i like being home schooled should i say i like it or tell them i hate it (the truth) even though it will offend my parents?


#2

actually it is your parents' role, right and duty to make decisions about your education because only they know all the facts and are in a position to weigh what is best for you. Since you don't say what it is specifically you don't like about homeschooling, there is nothing that shows you would not also hate school. Work on an attitude of love and obedience toward your parents, no matter what your situation, which will do wonders for your happiness and satisfaction with your state in life.


#3

Talk to your parents. Tell them that you dislike being home-schooled. Ask them to please look into other educational alternatives.

It could be that they think you love it. Maybe when they hear your actual thoughts, they will make some changes in your education.

Are there homeschool co-ops in your area? This could make a huge difference for you. In our city, there are at least three large (several thousand) students, including a Catholic co-op. These kids get together daily and have classes, sports, drama, music, field trips, etc. (To me, it’s not home school anymore, it’s alternative school! But that’s OK–at least the parents are in charge, instead of government bureaucrats with an areligious agenda.)

Have you actually been in public, private, or parachial schools in your area? Do you know what the alternatives are to home-schooling in your area? In our city, the public schools are abysmal. I wouldn’t send a dog to those schools. They are mired down with fighting between the teachers’ union and a hostile administration including a superintendent who is obviously not living in the real world. IMO, the middle schools and high schools in our city are controlled by the large national street gangs. Some of the schools are just plain dangerous. As for learning–53% of our public schools fall below the easiest federal guidelines. Our dropout rate is 25%, and among African-American males, it’s 50%.
Most of the “good” kids have departed the public schools for private and parochial schools. These are generally decent places, but they vary widely in their educational acumen, and several of the Christian schools are a joke. They say that they have excellent educations, but in reality, they are far behind, although they are still way ahead of the public schools. Be very careful if you decide to attend a Christian school. Perhaps you consider it worth it to accept a mediocre or even poor education in exchange for religious teaching and moral atmosphere. I do NOT consider this a good trade. Look for a school that offers a rigorous education along with a morally-upright atmosphere.

Our daughters attended a college prep school in our town and it cost a fortune (ten thousand a month tuition). For one year, my younger daughter went to one of the “Christian” schools in the city to get a more religious education–it was pathetic! In 10th grade at that school, she was doing the same work that she had done in middle school at the private prep school. She had already done the worksheets! She had to take Calculus because that’s where she was in Math–well, the teachers didn’t think that a sophomore could handle Calculus, as usually only Seniors, mainly boys, took that class at that school. Well, she not only handled it, but within two weeks, she was tutoring all those boys. All the teachers and kids in the Christian school thought she was some kind of genius and she won all kinds of academic awards from the school. She told them that she was no genius, and that she KNEW actual geniuses, kids at her old prep school. Although she was popular at the Christian school and made friends that she maintains to this day, she did return to the prep school because it was obvious that the education was superior.

Anyway, you need to make sure that you know what you’re getting into before opting out of homeschooling. Make sure that you’re grounded in reality and not longing for a school that doesn’t exist anymore except in books or on television. Your utimate goal in education is to get the BEST education you can acquire. The social aspects are part of that, yes, but in the end, if you don’t know the academic subjects, then you have wasted your time and your parents’ money.

Finally, if your parents are in any way tyranical, perhaps confining you to your home and grounds, or forcing you to do much of the heavy work in your home (slavery), or perhaps forbidding many widely-accepted-as-innocent pasttimes (e.g., reading age-appropriate fictional novels or listening to morally-upright popular music), or not allowing you to associate with others your age, then you need to talk to a priest or someone in your parish that you trust.

If they are actually abusive in such a way that you are being physically or mentally hurt, then definitely get some help immediately from the priest, doctor, or anyone who will help you.


#4

[quote="puzzleannie, post:2, topic:218012"]
actually it is your parents' role, right and duty to make decisions about your education because only they know all the facts and are in a position to weigh what is best for you. Since you don't say what it is specifically you don't like about homeschooling, there is nothing that shows you would not also hate school. Work on an attitude of love and obedience toward your parents, no matter what your situation, which will do wonders for your happiness and satisfaction with your state in life.

[/quote]

They most certainly do not know all the facts. I have seen plenty of circumstances and known plenty of people where homeschooling was absolutely not the best thing. In some cases, absolutely it made sense. It has a great deal to do with literally more factors than we can list. However, to suggest they know all the facts..
as far as this no matter the situation line as well...careful...very careful


#5

[quote="Cat, post:3, topic:218012"]
Talk to your parents. Tell them that you dislike being home-schooled. Ask them to please look into other educational alternatives.

It could be that they think you love it. Maybe when they hear your actual thoughts, they will make some changes in your education.

Are there homeschool co-ops in your area? This could make a huge difference for you. In our city, there are at least three large (several thousand) students, including a Catholic co-op. These kids get together daily and have classes, sports, drama, music, field trips, etc. (To me, it's not home school anymore, it's alternative school! But that's OK--at least the parents are in charge, instead of government bureaucrats with an areligious agenda.)

Have you actually been in public, private, or parachial schools in your area? Do you know what the alternatives are to home-schooling in your area? In our city, the public schools are abysmal. I wouldn't send a dog to those schools. They are mired down with fighting between the teachers' union and a hostile administration including a superintendent who is obviously not living in the real world. IMO, the middle schools and high schools in our city are controlled by the large national street gangs. Some of the schools are just plain dangerous. As for learning--53% of our public schools fall below the easiest federal guidelines. Our dropout rate is 25%, and among African-American males, it's 50%.

Most of the "good" kids have departed the public schools for private and parochial schools. These are generally decent places, but they vary widely in their educational acumen, and several of the Christian schools are a joke. They say that they have excellent educations, but in reality, they are far behind, although they are still way ahead of the public schools. Be very careful if you decide to attend a Christian school. Perhaps you consider it worth it to accept a mediocre or even poor education in exchange for religious teaching and moral atmosphere. I do NOT consider this a good trade. Look for a school that offers a rigorous education along with a morally-upright atmosphere.

Our daughters attended a college prep school in our town and it cost a fortune (ten thousand a month tuition). For one year, my younger daughter went to one of the "Christian" schools in the city to get a more religious education--it was pathetic! In 10th grade at that school, she was doing the same work that she had done in middle school at the private prep school. She had already done the worksheets! She had to take Calculus because that's where she was in Math--well, the teachers didn't think that a sophomore could handle Calculus, as usually only Seniors, mainly boys, took that class at that school. Well, she not only handled it, but within two weeks, she was tutoring all those boys. All the teachers and kids in the Christian school thought she was some kind of genius and she won all kinds of academic awards from the school. She told them that she was no genius, and that she KNEW actual geniuses, kids at her old prep school. Although she was popular at the Christian school and made friends that she maintains to this day, she did return to the prep school because it was obvious that the education was superior.

Anyway, you need to make sure that you know what you're getting into before opting out of homeschooling. Make sure that you're grounded in reality and not longing for a school that doesn't exist anymore except in books or on television. Your utimate goal in education is to get the BEST education you can acquire. The social aspects are part of that, yes, but in the end, if you don't know the academic subjects, then you have wasted your time and your parents' money.

Finally, if your parents are in any way tyranical, perhaps confining you to your home and grounds, or forcing you to do much of the heavy work in your home (slavery), or perhaps forbidding many widely-accepted-as-innocent pasttimes (e.g., reading age-appropriate fictional novels or listening to morally-upright popular music), or not allowing you to associate with others your age, then you need to talk to a priest or someone in your parish that you trust.

If they are actually abusive in such a way that you are being physically or mentally hurt, then definitely get some help immediately from the priest, doctor, or anyone who will help you.

[/quote]

I am sorry you have a school district that is not quality. However, I find it hard to believe that you do not have some good school district around you. If you will PM me the name of the district, I bet I can find several.
In our district, over 90 of the kids graduate and we most certainly are not overran by gangs. Do no slam public schools based upon the actions of some poor ones.


#6

No.

This is your parents’ right and responsibility. However, that does not mean that you cannot have input. Can you articulate what, specifically, you dislike about homeschooling and offer some constructive feedback to your parents on how to make it better?

Lieing is not right. However, neither is embarrassing your parents or calling them out in public. So, find something nice to say about homeschooling-- for example, “it does give us a lot of flexibility.” That is true, and it is non-committal on how well you “like” homeschooling.

And, then talk with your parents about how to improve the homeschooling.

What about it do you “hate” and why?


#7

I apologize if my post appeared to slam public schools. That was not my intention.

I know that there are many good and wholesome public school districts all around our district, although the gangs are making inroads into these smaller town schools, too.

But it does a child/teen no good if the child/teen does not actually LIVE in those districts. Only in rare circumstances are children allowed to attend public school out of their own district.

So I fail to see your point, unless you are suggesting that the parents move to another district. I agree with that approach entirely, even if it is a sacrifice for the parents. We should have moved away the instant we realized what a mess we had moved into, but we didn’t because we kept thinking that surely things would improve. They haven’t. I doubt they ever will at this point, and I fully expect that eventually the state will take over our school district and re-do it from scratch.


#8

[quote="Anna1430, post:1, topic:218012"]
I've been home schooled almost all my life. I hate it! I understand parents have their reasons for home schooling but do you think the kids should be allowed to choose if they want to be home schooled or public schooled? When people ask me how i like being home schooled should i say i like it or tell them i hate it (the truth) even though it will offend my parents?

[/quote]

Anna,

I would imagine that you are in high school, if you are a member of this forum. Why don't you see if your parents would be open to you taking some college courses at a nearby college or university? You could earn real college credits and see how a college classroom setting is....I would venture to say that 99% of the public school kids don't even get this opportunity, since they are busy enough trying to do their school work and deal with the daily drama of high school in a traditional setting, let alone few people realize that most colleges let in high school students to take certain courses.

I think this sounds like a great way for homeschooled teens to prepare for college. I've heard about "average, run-of-the-mill" homeschooled teens who start at a university the fall after they graduate from their homeschool program and are at a sophomore level since they took classes while still in "high school". I use the term "average" so as not to be confused with those homeschooled geniuses that Harvard and MIT actively seek out and we read about in the paper.


#9

I plan to homeschool my children, but I also plan to let them choose whether they attend public school after the first few years. I graduated from my local public school system and now I teach in it, and it is NOT a place I would want my young children attending. The stuff even the kindergarteners do and say would make your skin crawl - and I work at what is considered a “good” school. Plus, the academic standards are very low. That’s probably why we have twice the national average of children homeschooled or in private school in this county. I want to make sure they get a solid foundation in the first few critical years.

If you don’t like being homeschooled, you should think about the specific reasons why and then address them with your parents. Unless you tell them you are unhappy they may not think anything is wrong. Also keep in mind that the grass is often greener on the other side. To say I hated high school would be a huge understatement. It was the worst time of my life and I’m still suffering emotionally from things that happened to me there (my high school had the highest crime rate in the county, and one of the highest in the state) and I desperately wish I had been homeschooled. I would be a better, happier person if I had. I am still very fearful around certain types of people because I can’t shake the feeling that they will do to me now what they did back then.


#10

[quote="Anna1430, post:1, topic:218012"]
I've been home schooled almost all my life. I hate it! I understand parents have their reasons for home schooling but do you think the kids should be allowed to choose if they want to be home schooled or public schooled? When people ask me how i like being home schooled should i say i like it or tell them i hate it (the truth) even though it will offend my parents?

[/quote]

You need to have an honest sit-down talk with your parents. While you may have very valid reasons why you hate homeschooling, your parents may have just as valid reasons for why they have chosen to homeschool. Plus, since you have always been homeschooled, you have nothing to compare it to. Unless you can give us more info or state specifically why you hate homeschooling, its difficult to form any kind of advice about your situation other than you need to tell your parents how you are feeling.


#11

It isn't your choice. As a parent, it is my responsibility to instill the Catholic faith into my children, that is the number one objective. Public school is opposed to the teachings of our faith and most Catholic schools do a sub par job of teaching the Catholic faith.
Home schooling is the only alternative.

IMHO parents should be educate their children, not somebody else. My son is six years old and starting long division this week. He also reads at a fourth grade level. Not too bad considering his mother (teacher) only has a high school diploma.

Not only that, but he knows more about his Catholic faith than most of the adults at our parish.


#12

Do your parents know how you feel? I think you need to sit down and talk to them, and be specific about what you don't like about homeschooling. There may be options to address what you don't like about homeschooling (e.g. co-ops or taking college courses, etc.), but without knowing what you don't like about it, the only advice I can give you is that you need to speak with your parents. Be specific -- instead of saying "I hate being homeschooled," tell them "I don't like X aspect of homeschooling because..." Hopefully this will lead to a conversation that is productive for both you and your parents.


#13

As a homeschooling Mom I would LOVE to have my son come to me and tell me specifically what he would like to change about his schooling. Stopping homeschooling altogether may not be an option but there may very well be ways you can change things together to make you happier with your education.

In our home we will NEVER stop homeschooling. It’s simply not an option due to living in a rural community and the commute to the next school district being very unreasonable. We love being a homeschooling family.

There are days when my son doesn’t like it and I have him tell me WHY. The WHY is important here because if it’s something I can change, I do! Recently (he’s in 2nd grade) he told me he wanted more science, no history, and to start cursive. Obviously he can’t just stop having history but we did change the way we’re teaching it, add more science, and start cursive!

Try offering constructive suggestions on your schooling to your family. You may be very surprised with the results!


#14

I went to public school from kindergarten to 3rd grade. Then i went to a privet school for 4th. I don’t like not getting to see my friends and it might sound crazy but i don’t like not having homework and being able to talk about school with my friends. I told my parents last year but they said we didn’t have a good school. But the privet school i went to in 4th grade was a good school. Maybe i just need to get over it and wait a few more years :shrug: and then i can start collage


#15

Um...is anyone else going to say it?

I'm dying to say it, but it's such an online taboo that I'm scared my computer will collapse.

But this is just too...tempting!

AHHH!

Someone say it!


#16

[quote="Cat, post:15, topic:218012"]
Um...is anyone else going to say it?

I'm dying to say it, but it's such an online taboo that I'm scared my computer will collapse.

But this is just too...tempting!

AHHH!

Someone say it!

[/quote]

No, Cat, no. don't do it!!

Anna, it sounds to me like you just need more time with homeschool friends. I know that my teens have a hard time talking with school kids because the school kids just want to talk about......school stuff!! It's hard to feel left out because you aren't there, isn't it? Of course, if you do an activity together like 4-H or sports or community theater, you can bridge the difference of not having the same schooling experience because you have the activity to talk about.

So, you need an action plan concerning getting together with more homeschooled teens. If you live in an area in which there aren't many Catholic homeschool teens, it'll be harder to do.

My teens really like being homeschooled but I really have to work at driving them around and arranging times for them to be with their friends. So, you probably should offer to help with some chores your mom has, so she can be freed up to get you around more.

And........don't forget to pray about it!!

But, do talk to your mom about possibilities of getting more frequent contact with homeschool kids.


#17

Um…is anyone else going to say it?

I’m dying to say it, but it’s such an online taboo that I’m scared my computer will collapse.

But this is just too…tempting!

AHHH!

Someone say it!

i dont understand what this means. if someone ***was ***going to say what you’re dying to say, what would they say?


#18

[quote="monicatholic, post:17, topic:218012"]
i dont understand what this means. if someone **was **going to say what you're dying to say, what would they say?

[/quote]

My guess is it's the spelling errors. But tons of "schooled" kids and their parents spell poorly, too. It isn't a homeschooling phenomenon. :shrug:


#19

yikes, then sancta, if my online spelling was anyone’s litmus test, i’d be banned from homeschooling and they’d drag all my kids back home for a recount.

i’m a pretty good speller but a pretty sloppy typist AND i can never install spell check on this page no matter how hard i try. so i’m one for three: OK speller, bad typist, bad installer.

now, back to our regularly scheduled programming…


#20

Sorry i was typing too fast and holding my brother. I guess i should pay more attention :blush:


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