Honesty on these forums?


#1

I’ve been hanging out here for a few months. On the non-catholic forum but also a few others. Because I am not a practicing Catholic, there are lots of threads I refrain from posting on, because I don’t feel it is fair to compromise anyone’s beliefs by offering a non-catholic opinion on some issues.

But lately a few threads have got me wondering about honesty and openess. When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.

Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation? Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?

Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.

cheddar…whistling, where have all the humans gone?


#2

[quote=cheddarsox]I’ve been hanging out here for a few months. On the non-catholic forum but also a few others. Because I am not a practicing Catholic, there are lots of threads I refrain from posting on, because I don’t feel it is fair to compromise anyone’s beliefs by offering a non-catholic opinion on some issues.

But lately a few threads have got me wondering about honesty and openess. When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.

Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation? Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?

Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.

cheddar…whistling, where have all the humans gone?
[/quote]

You’re wondering if Catholics here are sinners? Yes, of course. I’m a Catholic and I’m a sinner. Realize too that it’s not always necessary to confess all your past sins to talk through an issue. Remember also that part of being human is being ashamed of our faults and our sins, and so that may inhibit us from laying them out in public.


#3

I am not quite sure I get the gist of the opening post. I’m a sinner for sure, if I wasn’t I don’t know what else I’d be, dead probably. :eek:

I don’t go in for miraculous medals and scapulars, I carry a chotki in my pocket. I try to make time to pray.

I deal with a lot of temptations, I think most people would. That’s how it is for us, everyone has their own way. We are reaching for the face of God in the best way we know how and we communicate with each other here, perhaps because we cannot find each other in the communities we belong to.

So this is a self-selected group, you should expect to find some of those few who are trying harder here, and also their avid critics.


#4

I, too, am a sinner. One purpose of this site is to help each other become better catholics. We all have room for improvement. That’s why we’re here. Sometimes it does seem like we’re a bit too perfect. It’s hard to really “see” the pain behind someone’s post. Or the misery. Words aren’t always sufficient.

If I were to confess my sins here, I’d fill the whole board. And I think that would be true for the others as well. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or to put your two cents worth in.


#5

Like the others have said, we’re all sinners, and most of us know better. So when someone asks a question we give the Catholic response, even if, occasionally, we can’t live up to the standards ourselves.

That doesn’t make us hypocrits; just imperfect, and striving for perfection.


#6

[quote=cheddarsox]I’ve been hanging out here for a few months. On the non-catholic forum but also a few others. Because I am not a practicing Catholic, there are lots of threads I refrain from posting on, because I don’t feel it is fair to compromise anyone’s beliefs by offering a non-catholic opinion on some issues.

But lately a few threads have got me wondering about honesty and openess. When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.

Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation? Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?

Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.

cheddar…whistling, where have all the humans gone?
[/quote]

Sorry if some of us have dissapointed you, but I usually tell my sins to a priest—cheers.


#7

[quote=cheddarsox]…whistling, where have all the humans gone?
[/quote]

This forum is not a confessional. I have no problem laying bare most of my faults, if there is a good cause for such an action. More often, if I wish to address one person, that is what the private message function is for.


#8

I’m not accusing anyone of being a hypocrite, just wondering why so shiny a face all the time. I don’t feel people here misrepresent themselves, just very selectively perhaps.

Nor do I want/expect people to “confess” here. I hardly think it is a confession to say you don’t have a rosary hanging on your rear view mirror, but maybe fuzzy dice instead! I don’t think those things constitute sins.

The times that people do share their weak points, for the most part people are very understanding and helpful, sharing really good advice and support, as well as teachings. I guess I am just trying to get a grip on the flavor of these boards.

cheddar


#9

[quote=Christy Beth]I, too, am a sinner. One purpose of this site is to help each other become better catholics. We all have room for improvement. That’s why we’re here. Sometimes it does seem like we’re a bit too perfect. It’s hard to really “see” the pain behind someone’s post. Or the misery. Words aren’t always sufficient.

If I were to confess my sins here, I’d fill the whole board. And I think that would be true for the others as well. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or to put your two cents worth in.
[/quote]

Thanks Christy,

I am enjoying these boards.

cheddar


#10

Hi, cheddar!
I hope that your presence here is a sign of a desire not to be “luke-warm”, so to speak…

[quote=cheddarsox] Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation?
[/quote]

Used to use it all the time (when I was a non-practicing Catholic, like you!). Then the wife introduced me to NFP, and it really opened my eyes. Now, I wouldn’t touch the stuff. It’s kinda like taking a smoker to an emphysema treatment center - it really makes you take stock of what you’ve been doing with your life! If you wanna’ know more about what really smacked me upside the head about this, PM me and I’ll give you some resources.

[quote=cheddarsox]Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?
[/quote]

Yes, I have a rosary in my car - break in case of emergencies! I don’t pray it as often as I should, but I pray to the Blessed Mother every day, and to God unceasingly.

[quote=cheddarsox]Are you really all that good?
[/quote]

Nope. Far from it. I am quite in need of a Savior! You never know, however, when there may be a Saint on the other end of cyberspace…it’s probably best not to try and judge.

[quote=cheddarsox] Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others?
[/quote]

Nope. I’ll share, if it’s warrented - most of the time it’s not germane to the discussion, as we’re typically talking about absolutes and not personal experience.

God bless, and I will pray to the Blessed Mother for you!
RyanL


#11

[quote=The Barrister]Like the others have said, we’re all sinners, and most of us know better. So when someone asks a question we give the Catholic response, even if, occasionally, we can’t live up to the standards ourselves.

That doesn’t make us hypocrits; just imperfect, and striving for perfection.
[/quote]

Well said! That was great!

When someone here asks me a question, I will most likely give the “official” Catholic answer. If you ask me about birth control, I’ll give you The Church’s answer. Have I ever used it? Nope, have never had occasion to. I think you should check out the Spirituality section in particular to see people who are ‘struggling’. I have also found them in other places.


#12

Actually I was a outside the Church when I encountered these forums, they have helped me become a better Catholic.

As far as the “image” we are putting forth…
It is not like I act like a devout Catholic or put on a face just to impress people, I honestly am trying to be a better person. I am just a regular guy who is trying to live out my faith and be a witness as I really believe in it.

After being outside the Church and coming back I now really appreciate it. I don’t float around all day in a lotus position with a with my hands together, humming, a rosary around my neck, but I am trying to learn more about the faith and be a better Catholic.

You should live your life in a joyous Christian manner just because of your love for Jesus, and I am trying each day to do that.

God Bless
Scylla


#13

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posted by cheddarsox

[size=2][size=3][size=2]Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff? [/size][/size][/size]
[/size]
And here all along I thought my deep dark confession was that I do have a rosary hanging from my rearview mirror instead of the fuzzy dice!

I can’t let my Jewish friend know, she told me she would have to hurt me if I ever hung a rosary from my rearview mirror after I told her I was going back to the Catholic Church:D


#14

For what it’s worth, I have a Saint Benedict Crucifix hanging from my rear view mirror for the past 3 years or so.
A tiny picture of the Divine Mercy on the dash, and a magnetic picture of the Madonna & Child Jesus.
And as for sins, well yes I’m a sinner, but thats something between my confessor and me, and offcourse God.

Anyway it was hard enough to confess at the time without posting it up here, sorry if that sounds rude, it’s not intended that way.


#15

:crying: I have nothing hanging from my rearview mirror! :crying:


#16

OK, we are human and we have all sinned and most would admit that. We come here to discuss our faith and we are putting our best foot forward. We would help a wayward Catholic to get back on the path because we bellieve we can be forgiven all things in Christ.

Some people get banned or restricted for uncharitable comments and so there is some evidence of slipping back on what Jesus asks of us. None of us want that to happen and we try to keep our priorities in life: God first and then family.

I think that we all have our conversion stories, our walk with Christ, and our own take on this faith of ours. Welcome to the forums and please do speak up. We would be happy to explain how and why we think the way we do.

I do pray the rosary every time I drive longer than 20 minutes. On short drives I pray for the unborn and for their parents to carry them to term. I don’t like bumper stickers or things hanging from mirrors (not required by the church LOL ).


#17

cheddarsox,

I wish I still had the paper, but in college, I wrote a paper against Humanae Vitae, quoting extensively from Fr. Charles Curran. Of course, that was before he was booted from the Catholic University of America and started teaching at a Methodist college. At that time, I was confident that I was right and the Catholic Church had been wrong for the past 2000 years. Of course, in all my confidence about moral theology, I never prayed. I never went to Mass except once in a blue moon, I never went to Confession, etc.

What a prodigal son I used to be. I know more about God and His will now, and so I have pledged not to be that kind of dissident Catholic anymore.

I figure, if I’m going to be Catholic, I might as well invest my entire self, body and soul, into being Catholic. If you’re going to do something, do it well.

Once I had kids of my own, things became much more clear to me. My personal sloth, my lukewarmness and my dissent was hard to objectively defend when faced with the awesome responsibility of being a father. As you mature in faith, it dawns on you that Holy Mother Church knows what she is talking about afterall.


#18

I have a rosary on my rear-view mirror, one on my thermostat, several hanging from my bulletin board (just in case, you know), and a marble one on my piano. I also have a Native American Madonna figurine on a shelf in my living room, crucifixes in my foyer and my bedroom, large and small pics of Our Lady of Gaudalupe, and a picture of Jim Caviezel portraying Christ on my bulletin board. Whew!

I also have lots of Native American blankets on my walls and furniture, pictures with Southwest themes on the walls, pictures of my kids, various knick-knacks, and a metal wall sculpture of three saguaro cactuses (cacti?). So yes, we can mix and match the holy and the secular, although it would not be a good idea to include the profane or merely vulgar. :bigyikes: :smiley:

Am I perfect, or anywhere near that? No way. I am very much in need of a Savior, and will always be grateful for the sacrament of confession. Still, I know what the Church teaches about many things, and I am willing to defend those teachings.

Another reason this seems like we have no problems is that the forums were designed to discuss particular aspects of the Church, not necessarily just our spirituality, or lack thereof. So we come together to discuss or even argue over things that may seem unrelated to our personal faith issues.


#19

Oh boy I am far from being a perfect Catholic. I’m learning a lot of information on this board. No one is perfect, but we strive to be good Catholics as much as possible.

Yes, we have a rosary on the rear-view mirror in the car. That’s one of the first things my mom does when we get a new car. I pray everyday almsot before I go to bed. I recently learned to pray the rosary. I pray the rosary at least every two weeks more or less.


#20

I am honest.http://bestsmileys.com/tempted/3.gifNot!

I am honest.http://bestsmileys.com/tempted/3.gifNot!

I am honest.http://bestsmileys.com/tempted/3.gifNot!

Oh, the insanity of it all! :stuck_out_tongue:


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