How can I ask a private question?


How can I ask a private question?


Just ask… but you may want to put a disclaimer in the topic because there are some younger teens on the forums…


There are PM’s here, which mean Private Message.

Do not trust them entirely though.


Who do you want to answer the question?

I doubt that you want to ask an entirely “private” question, because then nobody would see it, or answer it. :wink:


God would, and maybe this poster wants us to remember that.

Wild assumption on my part, but I like to think that there had to be a purpose behind the question.

And if not, there may be now.


If you mean how to ask a private question that only one person will see and may respond to, you should use the Private Message feature. Please be aware though that not all users here may have this feature enabled.

If you mean a question for that everyone may see and answer but that preserves your anonymity, just ask it here without using your real name or location, and also make sure that information is not visible to others in your user profile.


alrite, here goes nothing:

I just want to apologize beforehand for bringing up such a controversial topic but it’s something that’s been scaring me to death for the past year. Here it goes:

About a year ago I had a very short “relationship” with the neighborhood tramp (sorry I couldn’t think of a nicer word) I knew I shouldn’t have done it, but I was just so lonely at the time and she seemed so willing.
Word had it that she had an STD or two. The furthest we ever went was a kiss (not french) but I’m still scared because I heard that you can get an STD from kissing an infected person.
No I haven’t shown any symptoms at all that would lead me to think that I’m infected but the thought that I’m a carrier haunts me beyond words. The idea that I could ever pass anything on to my future wife or kids scares me. I do question wether or not this is just an urban legend (the only source whose EVER told me its possible to transmit an STD this way is just one of my buddies) and I’ve never heard it anywhere else.

I’ve tried for the past year to just forget about it and move on but I just can’t any longer. I need to know how plausible this fear is.



I’m not really sure there are any STD’s that you can catch by kissing. Maybe possibly herpes, but I’m not even sure about that. I think the most you can “catch” is a cold.

I think the best thing you can do is calm down, see a dr. if your really worried about it to calm your fears.

Maybe praying for the “town tramp” might be a good idea too. :thumbsup:


so u think this is just an urban legend?


Go to your doctor and ask to be tested! Or, if you want to be anonymous, go to a county clinic and ask to be tested.

There are dozens of STDs, and they are transmitted in different ways. Some are easier than others. If you are worried, go get tested. A girl I grew up with got a lifelong case of herpes during her first sexual encounter from only oral sex, so some things can be passed from the mouth. And the inside of the mouth is mucus membrane just like the inside of the vagina.


A doctor can do a few simple blood tests to determine if you’ve contracted anything. It would set your mind at ease, probably more than we could. :wink: I think there might be at least one STD that could be transmitted orally, so I’d check with a physician.

EDIT: I see I was too slow. Thanks, dusky!


how could they keep that anonymous? won’t my parents find out?


Whoa, wait… how old are you? I thought I was addressing an adult!

Unfortunately, once a child passes the age of about 13, many doctors consider it their personal mission to keep everything about that child secret from the parents! Somehow I doubt you will have a problem with that.

In any case, medical records are private. However, if you use your parent’s medical insurance to pay for the tests, then they may find out about it when they get their statement or explanation of benefits from the office visit.

From what I understand, people go to county clinics and give fake names all the time to get these kinds of tests. That means paying cash or finding someone’s free clinic (if you live in an urban area, they should not be hard to find) so that no one can trace anything.

However, now that I know you are a minor, I can’t stress enough that you should probably talk to your parents about this. I am not going to say anything stupid like “they won’t be mad” but if they are any kind of decent parents, they want the best for you and have your best interests at heart. You need to let them help you.


I just got back from the UNIVERSITY health center (I’m a college student, but I still care what my parents think) and I told them my predicament. The nurse stopped, looked at me funny and burst out laughing. She told me I had absolutely nothing to worry about. She told me in all the years she had been working there she had never heard of such a case actually happening (and this woman was well in her 60s) She told me the worse that could’ve been transmitted was the cold or something like that. I asked if she was positive and she laughed again and said "After all these years? Trust me"
I walked out of that health center feeling like a million bucks :smiley:

Thank you all for the help and God Bless


Well, having had experience with many very ignorant nurses, I am not sure I would trust any one nurse’s opinion. Or doctor for that matter. You would be amazed how much of what medical personnel tell you is personal opinion cloaked in professional credentials.

Anyway, I am glad to hear you are not a minor. You and the nurse are probably right. If you never progressed beyond kissing, and according to your account, not even open-mouthed kissing, then you probably are fine. I just thought that if you were really that worried, just get the tests.

I hope you will use this experience to help you make better decisions in the future. I happen to know from my DH’s experiences how badly and for how long ill-advised youthful sexual acting out can destroy a guy’s sense of worth, hope, and value of his future. I pray you don’t fall into that.

P.S. Your parents have figured out by now that you are not perfect, and will love you even when you screw up! But I do think that as an adult, this is your private business and there is no reason to share it with them.


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