I think many people come to this point in their life. It sounds like you want to move on to a more intimate relationship with God which is a good thing.
You mention that your prayers are answered in the little things, but not in the big things. This implies that many (perhaps most?) of your prayers are prayers of petition; prayers asking God to do certain things. To become more intimate with God we need to move beyond that stage in our relationship. If prayers of petition dominate your prayer life then look to add other types of prayer like prayers of thanksgiving, prayers of contrition and prayers of adoration. I would also encourage taking time in silence to listen to God. I know this is always a struggle for me; trying to quiet my mind and not think of superfluous things is nearly impossible most times, but we cannot converse with God if we do all the talking.
Really look at how you relate to God similar to how you relate to a close friend or family member. Just as close friendships are not defined by what we do for each other, neither is our relationship with God. St Bernard of Clairvaux tells us that there are four degrees of love:
*]The first is loving yourself for your own sake. (selfish love)
*]The second is loving God for your own sake. (dependence on God)
*]The third is loving God for God’s sake. (intimacy with God)
*]The fourth is loving yourself for God’s sake. (united to God’s love)
If we apply these principles to other relationships, then we can often see how loving the other person for their own worth, independent of our own benefit, is what leads to intimacy. For most of us though I think it is more difficult to obtain those last two degrees of love with God. Part of it requires setting aside our own self doubts, hate of ourselves, and holding on to past hurts. We thirst for the love of God, but are often too afraid to go to Him out of fear of not being perfect or being rejected. God waits for us and will enfold us in his loving embrace if we simply allow him to.
Part of how we enter a more intimate relationship with him is through scripture. You cannot love someone who you don’t know. This is why reading the Bible and perhaps Lectio Divina are important. Spend time everyday reading about God so that you can better know Him. You also need to be able to cultivate a dislike of not just mortal sin, but also venial sins. If you are not already doing a nightly examination of conscience, this is a good habit to get into. Just spend time each night seeing what you did good and where you stumbled during the day. Offer an act of contrition for anything you have done wrong and offer prayers of thanksgiving for the grace that lead you to do right. Also pray to do better the next day.
It’s not always easy, I know I fail at the above more often than I succeed, but don’t count the times you fail so much as the times you do better. Some of it is simply practice. It took me a long time to let go of petty hurts and I still feel myself falling into those old habits, but I find I fall less often now (and for shorter amounts of time). Just keep telling yourself it’s a journey and pick yourself up when you fall and keep walking towards Him.