I’d appreciate ideas on finding ways for me to renew my life in a way that opens my wife’s heart to go to marriage counseling. She just filed for divorce this week. She says it’s been a matter of me not validating her. We’ve both been through a lot of stress, too. I just successfully underwent surgery for prostate cancer. She was heavily medicated (probably overmedicated) for a large pat of last year when trying counseling for the first time to improve sleepfulness and some depression with which she has had a life-long battle. There’s been problems with my job, too. Unfortunately, my wife feels she cannot improve our relationship because some of the nice things she does get ingnored by me. We/ve been married 18 years and have no kids. I’m Catholic and she is Lutheran. Her counselor, pastor and mother favor divorce as a redemptive process. I am deeply distressed. We almost made it to a Retrouville marriage workshop weekend session, but she got sick at the last moment. Then, she decided she would not like to try at any more marriage counseling things even though we have never done marriage counseling. We’ve been separated for a month. I live in the house. She works in the house because her Ortho lab is located in it, but she lives in an apartment at an undisclosed place. She has a male friend who she talks to a lot, but she says this is not an affair (and I believe that it is not a physical relationship). She goes to church regularly and does a tremendous amount of volunteer work at her church.